Your resource for CARE Parenting
(Conscious, Attuned, Responsive and Empathetic)
(We appreciate your patience while this website is under re-construction with a new web host. Am trying to make the links work and to align things so they'll look right on cell phones AND on PCs.
"Secure Babies Strong Children Successful Adults"
Professionals Speak
Ability to self-soothe
"An infant is not neurologically or developmentally capable of calming or soothing himself to sleep in ways that are healthy. The part of the brain that allows him to begin the process of learning to regulate his own emotions...isn’t well developed until he is two and a half to three years of age.” Parents are "the emotional regulators” for babies and young children. - from "Attached at the Heart" by B. Nicholson and L. Parker
Addictions - often an attempt to finally feel nurtured
"Opiates made me feel safe and warm, cared for [and] soothed."
- Marc Lewis, PhD. Drug addict for 10 years (LSD, heroin, meth, crack, etc.) Later became a neuroscientist.
(Note from PCW: In his book, "Memoirs of an Addicted Brain," Lewis describes his distant relationship with his parents as a teen and as an adult. They were not warm or loving people, so presumably their relationships with him in infancy and childhood were no better.)
Damage caused by "crying it out"
"Brain-imaging studies have shown that prolonged, uncomforted crying causes toxic stress chemicals to wash over the brain, opioids to be withdrawn and pain circuits in the brain to be activated. Over time, babies’ anti-anxiety systems can become altered, which increases their risk for depression and anxiety disorders. Babies’ brains can become wired for bodily hyperarousal, which can result in high blood pressure, poor sleep, panic attacks, chronic fatigue, headaches, eating and digestive disorders and/or other problems. " - from "The Science of Parenting" by psychotherapist M. Sunderland
Importance of social capital/social connectedness
"Public health researchers….have established beyond reasonable doubt that social connectedness is one of the most powerful determinants of our well-being.” - Robert D. Putnam, author of "Bowling Alone," Harvard professor
Risks of solitary sleep
“Three or four studies show quite conclusively that putting babies to sleep in a room by themselves at three to six months of age doubles their chances of dying from SIDS.” - Co-sleeping researcher Dr. James McKenna, quoted in "Attached at the Heart" by B. Nicholson and L. Parker
Spanking, hitting, slapping, etc.
"A meta-analysis of many studies found a correlation between parental corporal punishment and increased child aggression, delinquency and antisocial behavior, increased adult aggression, criminality and antisocial behavior, increased risk of abusing own child or spouse, among other undesirable behaviors and conditions. " - from "Attached at the Heart" by B. Nicholson and L. Parker
© McCarthy 2011