Your resource for CARE Parenting
(Conscious, Attuned, Responsive and Empathetic)
(We appreciate your patience while this website is under re-construction with a new web host. Am trying to make the links work and to align things so they'll look right on cell phones AND on PCs.
"Secure Babies Strong Children Successful Adults"
About Me
Why I decided to create Parenting for a Caring World:
I want to reduce some of the preventable suffering in the world, especially when it is our innocent and vulnerable babies that are affected. Science has confirmed what our hearts have always known: babies suffer when left to cry alone, not just in the moment but in the long term. The damage to their brains, anti-anxiety systems and trust in their caregivers makes them prone to depression, addictions, anxiety, anti-social behavior, fatigue and other physical and psychological problems.
I would much rather prevent problems than do the often futile and exponentially harder work of attempting to fix them later. And I believe that where children are concerned, an ounce of prevention is not worth a pound of cure; it’s worth a thousand pounds of cure.
I want to get good, research-based information into the hands of all parents, parents-to-be, professionals, researchers and the general public. The infant “independence-training” techniques recommended for decades by so-called experts have created insecure, emotionally malnourished children who have problems of various kinds as they become teens and adults. While other factors also contribute to our society's serious problems, we must acknowledge that our insensitivity to our babies' needs and feelings has played a part in creating the following realities:
The leading cause of disability in people aged 15 to 44 in the U.S. is clinical depression...Untreated addiction costs America $400 billion per year....Every day in America, 4 children are killed through abuse and neglect and 192 children are arrested for violent crimes...Suicide is the third leading cause of death among young people (ages 10 to 24)...About 28 percent of students ages 12 through 18 in the U.S. reported they were bullied at school during the 2008-2009 school year....In 2008, an estimated 31 million people aged twelve or older in the U.S. reported driving under the influence of alcohol at least once in the previous year....Just a few of the appalling statistics...
Treating our babies and young children with empathy and respect is one significant way we can create a more caring world and help protect our children from becoming either perpetrators or victims, from premature death, from abusive relationships, from addictions and other serious problems.
I have a Master of Arts degree from DePaul University; my focus areas were Holistic Child Development, Parenting Education and Counseling. I studied research findings from many fields about infant-rearing practices so I could report here which are harmful and which meet the emotional/relationship and other needs of infants and young children.
I have taught students from the preschool level to the university level and beyond, teaching adult professionals. Subjects have included Reading, Spanish, Phonics, Greek Roots of English words, College Success and ESOL (English for Speakers of Other Languages). I also have a great deal of experience in the fields of counseling and parenting education/support. I have taught parenting classes, facilitated many breastfeeding support group meetings, and counseled new mothers as well as people suffering from anxiety, relationship issues and so on. I have facilitated therapeutic play for children. In 2001 and 2002, I wrote a weekly research-based parenting column for my county’s main newspaper. For years I promoted “baby-wearing” by selling baby slings to promote parent-baby togetherness and optimum baby development, while freeing the parents’ hands for work. I am a Certified Educator of Infant Massage, which means I can teach parents and other caregivers Infant Massage. I am a Certified Instructor of Baby Sign Language, which means I help parents learn basic signs and respectful and responsive ways of communicating with their babies.
The wonderful and challenging experiences of giving birth and then breastfeeding and raising my son transformed my life. Nothing prepared me for the reality of caring for my own baby 24/7, though I had taken care of other people’s babies and read many books and articles. I had been exposed all my life to what has been the dominant infant-rearing philosophy in America for many decades: independence-training. To avoid raising spoiled, clingy, manipulative children we were supposed to teach them to be “independent” from the day they were born. Fortunately, I found a support group that promoted a respectful, responsive and relationship-oriented parenting philosophy. I am still a member of that wonderful organization whose philosophy guided me as I raised my son and led me into the field of infant advocacy and parent support/education. I now have two wonderful grandchildren whose pictures are below.
I am committed to promoting peaceful conflict resolution and harmony among all people. One very important way to promote peace and harmony in our society and in the world is to lay the foundation in the early years of every human being’s life. We must show babies that the greatest happiness truly comes from our relationships with other humans, not with things. This can be done by “being there” for them, not just when it’s convenient but when they need us. This involves consistently showing them respect, warmth and empathy.
My son with
my ex-husband
and me
© McCarthy 2011