Rituals of the Nacirema

A - F

Colorful Outcasts

Nacirema people, who are located north of Mexico, believe the only way to be accepted and loved is to be perfect so they spend hours coating their faces in sacred color and conducting painful ceremonies, and this really intrigues me. Why do the Nacirema find natural human features a horror and a disgrace to god and resort to doing anything in their power to conceal them?

This strange concept in the Nacirema culture is called Puekam, Puekam is performed in many ways commonly by women, but usually they will take bundles of a variety of different sacred strings and spend up to 10 hours covering every natural marking on their faces and replacing them with bright spiritual colors. They will apply these colors to their eyes, nose and mouth making them appear significantly larger and spend hours perfecting their technique, this is in Nacirema culture considered beautiful and if not performed you will be considered an outcast and be shut out from society.

The Nacirema have another form of fashion I find very strange. They will choose to inject shiny spikes all over their head and ears especially as they grow older, this appears to be a form of fashion for mostly women, but I cannot be certain. This ritual is performed by special priests in a large rectangular shrine, the priest will quickly and valiantly stab you to inject the shiny needle. I had the wonderful opportunity to speak with some Nacirema and ask them a few questions. I asked them the reason for this strange routine and they responded along the lines of, “I am ugly” they say if they stop this routine “Judgemental people will judge”.

It appears that this society is bent of the aspect of being perfect to the extent that they will shut people out for their slight imperfections so in order to hide the horror of the human face from the world as well as god they have resorted to spending hours coating their faces in sacred color and conducting painful ceremonies.

It is strange how the Nacirema has managed to keep this up even after many, many years of suffering and self doubt.

~ Harper B.

Battle of the Sacred Squares

The Nacirema choose to play certain ritualized games that favor their ritual practice more than their recreational rituals. They choose to do this so they can increase their status in their ritual like culture to display their act of citizenship.

During this sacred ritual practice they first display their tribes in the sacred squares. They then line up the majestic orbs which shine under the sun, but not in the dark on the sacred divide between these two tribes. Then the quiet, mysterious person in a black cloth with white stripes calls out a signal and they immediately seem to start this practice. When it starts the two tribes race to be the first to the sacred orbs. Certain members on each tribe let out a squeal with their feet on the floor then grunt, and throw the sacred orb as hard as they can at the other tribe. When someone gets hit by the sacred orb, which everyone fears, the sideline god comes and places them in a line outside of their square. If someone were to catch one of the sacred orbs thrown at them then the sideline god would reward them by bringing one of their tribe mates back into the square. As this event is largely watched by the fan bases of both tribes they have hired a service of elite tribe members to pick up the mystical orbs and bring them back into the square as needed.

This practice then goes on for quite a long time as the tribesmen who do this ritual never like to give up and mainly want to win for their image. I have interviewed some Nacirema who are very experienced in this ritual and they stated that “ The main purpose of this ritual especially at a high level is for prowess more than recreational “fun” and enjoyment”. The tribes like to play the game in a very similar way moving, jumping, grunting, and throwing. They also stated that they hoped the game would not change as their biggest fear was the game being unbalanced not becoming unenjoyable.

Overall we went over how the Nacirema prioritized certain things more than others, specifically playing very very seriously. I will most likely never know how they have not gotten any more serious outside of the ritual as they were trying way too hard when they were playing...

~ Owen B.

Sacred Performance

The Nacirema believe you should pretend to be something you're not, and present that to people. The ritual has no exact name, but is something that is commonly talked about. Today I will be letting you in on a sacred Nacirema tradition that has been going on for hundreds of years.

I was very blessed to have the Nacirema allow me to look upon the process of preparing for the ritual. They prepared for months. At least 4-8 times during every cycle of the moon, the troupers all gather, to practice the ritual in small sections. Everyone is very fixated on having every little thing faultless. They put themselves through very tough physical exertion. During the process of training for the ritual, the participants flail their bodys around, in direct and specific motions, guided by a mentor of a much older age.

And by the end of just one proceeding, their voices are meak, and strained from heaps of chanting. During the time of the ritual, the room it is executed in, is almost pitch black. They come onto an elevated platform and begin speaking in strange ways. The troupers wear elaborate garments, and thick paint on their faces. These rituals can last for hours, and only a few hundred people are allowed to attend at a time. To attend these exclusive rituals, you must present a gift to the overseer of the ritual. When you arrive to the ceremony, you must wait for 5 - 10 minutes before it starts. This way the people performing the ritual have a few moments to get to their starting spot.

The whole proceeding can take up to 1-2 hours, or occasionally even longer. Most people who have the gift of observing this sacred tradition enjoy the experience over all, but some hate going to the ritual. The people who were successful in observing the ritual, brag to those who did not attend.

Through the hundreds of years that the Nacirema have executed this ritual, it has advanced extremely. I hope one day you are all fortuitous to see a proceeding of this memorable ritual.

~ Konstantina B.

Being Respected

The Nacirema believe that being respected by their elders is essential to living and a very effective way to gain respect is by translating an unknown and lost language. This mysterious language was invented by very intelligent specimens that had existed long ago.

I was able to observe how and where the Nacirema did this ritual. Every home has a special place where the Nacirema translate this ancient language. Each Nacirema translates this mysterious language by using a sacred carving tool. This sacred carving tool is a powerful item that can carve and imprint symbols on the Sheet of the Lost Languages. Once a member of the Nacirema is finished translating a certain amount of symbols, they give their sheet to the Elders. The Elders have a deep understanding of this ancient language and the Elders plan to train Nacirema to become just like themselves. After they give their sheet to the Elders, the Elders check their work with The Scroll of Knowledge. If making mistakes or errors on translating the language becomes a trend, they will be dishonored and scorned for the rest of their life. If the Nacirema makes a mistake before they give their Sheet of Lost Languages, they can use a magical item called the Vanisher which will obliterate mistakes or errors.

Doing this ritual also has other benefits too. This ritual can help prepare even bigger rituals called seziuq, stnemssessa and stset. Seziuqs, stnemssessas, and stsets are the ultimate way to gain respect because translating this specific part of this ancient language is especially difficult.

This ritual proves that the Nacirema are very hardworking people; they gain respect from their elders by translating an ancient language. A final wondering I have about this ritual is, how could the Nacirema continue this ritual for so long without voting against doing it?

~ Arran C.

Tiny Mythical Sphere

Each year the nacirema gather 2 of the best humans to fight, to decide whos the best tiny mythical sphere bouncing ritual king. They first flip a piece of ancient copper, one side has a carving of the leader and the other has a symbol of the town . The two champions guess carving and whoever gets it correct gets to start with the tiny sphere. The first champion bounces the sphere on the dirt. They threw the sphere up and leaped to smack it with a wood black tool over the long piece of hardened oil. The champion swung the wood black tool but couldn't quite reach the tiny mythical sphere.

Then kids do child work and they sprint into the court and throw the mythical tiny sphere’s at the champions. Then the first champion gets to have the sphere again. They throw the mythical tiny sphere up into the air and smash the sphere over the long piece of oil. The other champion reaches over with the wood tool and hits it back over the oil piece. This is called gniyllar. The weird sphere game keeps on going until one of the leaders gets decimated.

The nacirema believed if they didn't do this ritual their laziness would stay. This ancient ritual helped a lot of people cure their laziness. How have the nacirema kept this ritual going on throughout the generations?

~ Jack C.

Tribal Stuffing Ceremonies

The Nacirema force their children to stuff themselves to heal after doing hard labor.

About 2 to 3 times every day, the Nacirema Perform a tradition to reunite with their family members. They set round pieces of magic stone and sharp sticks of iron and chromium. They then pick up the sharp sticks and stab their items in their round magic stone over and over again. They then place all of the things in their mouth. To some Nacirema peoples this is torture while to others it is cause to great happiness. After placing all of the items in their mouth, they are forced to swallow. The Nacirema believe that this helps you through the suffering of long days. When they are done, they place all the round stones and iron and chromium sticks in a dark pit and conceal it.

As you can see, The Nacirema have many wonderful and many torturous traditions such as swallowing items after repeatedly stabbing them with sharp sticks. The Nacirema have been doing this for centuries and many people complain but if they skip it, the next day they will have terrible pain. How can the Nacirema stand doing this torture every day!

~ Marc D.

Magical Carriages

The Nacirema are an abnormal culture living in the land just Northwest of the Lucayan tribe of the Bahamas.. I believe that the carriages that have inhabited the land are being used for laziness and convenience. The carriages are also tamed by their owners and very easy to use, and activate, and take anywhere. A tool that is very simple and easy to use.

Most people of the Nacirema land possess at least one of these carriages, although some have more or less. These carriages are acquired by trading special lime fabrics that are carefully hand-made, to the carriage breeder. After trading with the breeder, the new owner navigates the young carriage to it's new accommodation where it will eat, rest, and charge up for the next day.

There are many positive attributes of these carriages. I was invited by the Nacirema chief himself to see the magical internal features that this carriage has to offer. The first feature that it displays is a mysteriously cold presence that blows through small cracks. It also has shiftable human supporters, a disk that controls the carriage, rotating circles at the base of the carriages, and an interactive, clear separator made of flaming hot yellow balls the width of your hair that can emit special sounds that the Nacirema love to blast really loudly through spaces in the carriage. Although the best feature of this carriage is by far the way it drinks venomous liquids and turns it into energy. The Nacirema called this- oh wait- no I can't pronounce it. It’s a very complex word and very hard to pronounce.

There are many people to help take care of the carriage. There is the carriage doctor which can fix the carriage's injuries and problems that the carriage will face throughout its lifetime, a broadcasting station that can cast magical signals to upgrade the carriage, and food stations placed everywhere in the Nacirema land in case the carriage gets hungry or tired.

Even with all the features of these incredible carriages, the Nacirema tend to rely on carriages way too much. Most humans are weaker, lazier, and don't work their bodies enough all because of carriages’ conveniences. I wonder what their life would be like if carriages didn't exist and how much healthier the Nacirema would be without them.

~ Lucas D.

Direction-Changing Cubes

The Nacirema put lots of time and thought into their spiritual potions but even then they believe them to be not special enough and need a whole OTHER component that changes the potion. They believe these special potions can cool you down and help your vital red fluid. The vital fluid helps your blood flow.

All the time, the Nacirema drink a special liquid to burn their throat and torture themselves. They use it to help themselves and have to follow this routine or else, they will die. Although the potion is already very special, they must use another special technique to enhance it further. They also add a special element to the holy liquid they drink. They either eat it right away and make a bone-crunching noise, or they put it in a specially sacred pool of liquid.

If they eat it, then they will get increased vital red fluid circulation and it will activate your nerves. The only bad thing that they believe will happen on rare occasions if they have not fulfilled the full ritual or if they have not practiced the ritual enough. Also, they believe that if you do not do the ritual at all, then blood and rats will take over your body and you will be murdered someday. If the Nacirema dilute their special component and drink all of it, then the ceremony will be fulfilled and they get to repeat the same process forever.

Also, apart from only dying, then they will not feel satisfied with themselves and if they feel that way, then they will crumble to dust right away, which means that their body and soul cannot be retrieved from the dead.

So overall, the materials that they use in the potions are important to their health. They can use this elixir to restore and reinstitute what is missing for themselves. The Naciremas are very loyal to their culture and that is why they have managed so long with this ritual(also, part of the reason is because they don’t want to die).

~ Maximus C.

Tree Sap

The primitive Nacirema live south of the Cree tribe. The Nacirema spent a lot of time chewing tree sap to help with their unsophisticated lives. While studying the Nacirema they did a weird ritual, they would chew the sap for 10 to 15 minutes and they would throw it away into almost bottomless pits that are in all the rooms of their cottages. The tree sap is from a very special mystical tree called the Sapodilla. When they chew the sap it provides others nearby with wonderful smells. The sap makes any of the tribe members angry if they find it on one of their many handmade feetwarmers. These holy people believe that without their sacred sap they would become fat and fall into sleep. The sap only has one major problem, the fact that it gets stuck to some of the elder's teeth. These people chew the weird substance so as not to chew the ends of circular magical carving tools. People who don’t chew the magical sap are cursed and they inflate until they fall into endless sleep. This shows that the Nacirema know only that the tree sap they chew constantly is the only thing keeping their lives from being destroyed by nervous habits. The Nacirema are convinced that the tree sap they collect is very important to having a blessed life and fit body. It is such a wonder that the Nacirema have survived for so long by forcing their teeth to chew all the time.

~ Leo A.

The Orb of the Nacirema

The nacirema are a mysterious people that take part in strange rituals. These exotic rituals require much skill and strength of running to win.

This arena is round, has dirt and grass in it and has bystanders watching as if it's a coliseum. In the dirt part of the arena 4 white slabs need to be touched by the run-man to get a point. Next to the first mysterious slab there is a black clad man barking out orders. Also behind the stick-man there is another knight clad in black that yells orders out. In front of the stick-man there is a thrower, who throws the ritual orb.

Once the ritual orb is hit by the stick man he has to run as fast as possible before this exotic orb is thrown and caught at the 1st slab by a guard wearing an exotic leather garment. Although there is grass behind that guard where there stand 3 other guards waiting for the orb to be sticked far enough for them to get it. The stick is made of an exotic wood that is only used for this ritual. These two tribes need to both wear ritual garments to be able to participate in this ritual.

The nacirema are worried that if they don't participate in this ritual they will not be able to entertain others and themselves with this ritual. Some sounds they make are louder than the black knights sounds, the sounds the guards make have been translated roughly to run-man! Run-man! And, mine! Mine! So these strange words alert the other guards of the run-man. The ritual orb controls everything although it is extremely mysterious in its workings and choices.

I have witnessed this ritual, and even participated in it and I must say the nacirema are very mysterious in how this ritual works. I wonder how they have managed to do this for many years on end entertaining millions in the process. I hope to learn more about this ritual in the future and how the nacirema might change this ritual in the future.

~ Franco F.

Face Water Ritual

The Nacirema are a civilization above the Tarahumara people of Mexico. Everyday the Nacirema conduct a holy ritual, in which they use holy water, cleaned by holy people. Then they use a special substance which they use to clean their face, The reason the do this ritual is because the Nacirema think that the face is dirty and they must clean it everyday.

What I have found about the Nacirema, and this special ritual, is that they do it every day. They also have variations of doing it, like using a sharp blade to cut off facial hair with excotic cream. What they do is they splash special holy water. Then they use something like a soap or a cream, and lather it on their face. When I asked them why they do it, they said it's because “I am dirty”. They worry that they will become all dirty, and that nobody will like them, even their parents. They also may repeat this habit multiple times a day.

The Nacirema do a special ritual everyday, with holy water, and special creams and ointments. I wonder how the Nacirema have survived this long with this ritual.

~ Makoto A.

Ancient Foot Playing

The Nacirema are an ancient civilization that has lasted for many years and are still around today. Living west of the Europeans, and North of the Mexicans the Nacirema have many very strange and odd traditions. In this article I will talk about one of their very strange traditions which is about two warring tribes fighting with each other.

The Nacirema like to play an ancient game that they made up. Since the Nacirema’s territory is so big they have many different gruesome tribes that love to fight and gather to watch their tribe leader order them around to use their feet to move an ancient ball of rubber. Every week these tribes that live very far away from each other gather in big giant buildings where the people from the tribes cheer on the people in war. The tribe leader tells the people in war when to start this very hard battle. But before the tribes gather in the giant metal building the tribe people in war have to wear special clothes which is considered their warring armour. On the front of their warring armour is their number which they were assigned. But while they are battling they don’t just battle on hard ground, they battle on a giant field of grass with seats stacking up all around the grass field. The warring tribe people who watch push each other and squish into each other in these seats that are stacked on top of eachother. The Nacirema also have at the end of the giant field of grass a giant net hooked onto some ancient metal frame that the Nacirema made. Once the war begins the tribe people on the field fight each other to get the ancient ball of rubber. In some kind of mystical time limit the Nacirema have to use there feet to get the ancient rubber ball into the ancient metal frame with a net.

Just thinking about how the Nacirema have lasted this long just makes me wonder how they have survived so long with their very weird, and strange wars with an ancient rubber ball. It is also very strange how the Nacirema have had this tradition last so long and how this tradition originated.So, from what I have observed from the Nacirema proves that they are a very ancient and strange culture. If you ever want to visit the Nacirema make sure to visit the warring tribes.

~ Lynx C.

Playing with the Light

The Nacirema children believe that life is hard and use certain rituals to cure their boredom and stress.

These rituals normally include a parent or guardian lighting a fire inside a transparent box, though the size and shape vary depending on the quality of the box. These lanterns aren't available to the lowest ranking families but aren't incredibly expensive. These rituals can last for hours normally depending on if or when others want to leave. Since they last so long the light can be dangerous to their eyes. Not a lot of people conduct these rituals alone though it isn't impossible to find. These rituals are usually done to cure stress from the children or just to have fun, but there are some that just want to do something with their friends. This is very uncommon though.

The nacirema children find peace and fun in this ritual where there isn't in their lives. It helps relieve stress from their duties. How have the nacirema survived through the torment of their eyes and addiction to this ritual for so long?

~ Sawyer D.

Chemical Cravings

Naciremas believe that mixes of cow legs, yeast, chemicals, carbohydrates can fulfill them so they practice rituals to get this substance they crave.

I walked into loud holy square because my gut was wanting mixes of cow legs, yeast, chemicals, carbohydrates, oil and flour to fulfill me.

I heard babbles from the people wearing drapes and the civilians who travelled all the journey to receive this mouth watering mixture.Im sure all the people in the holy square had the same inside fear that they would get starved and ill and have to go to the Medicine man.

As I stepped in, three tall men with the same color drapes approached me. They hand me a piece of wood with engraving on it. I gazed through and ordered, I gave my earnings in exchange for the mouthwatering mix of chemicals. The aroma came through the wood shaped square, with my cow legs,yeast,chemicals, carbohydrates,oil and flour.

I noticed a statue. I watched as a civilian put his chalis over the statue, bean infused sugarcane comes out. I walked over to the statue and grabbed a chalis as I was about to get my bean infused sugarcane. A man with a drape came to me the same one that gave me my chemicals i was craving. “Hey you must pay for a chalis if you want bean infused sugarcane.” I only had very little earnings left to pay. I get my earnings from staring at a bright iron block for 7 hours. I need a chalis I gave my little earnings I had.I filled up the chalis and bubbles formed at the top.I was ecstatic!

Most Naciremas crave this mixture to satisfy. The Nacermas have been craving this mixture and doing this ritual for so long. Would you like this mixture?

~ Kasey F.

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