The most important first date safety tips are simple: meet in a busy public place, get yourself there and home, tell a friend where you'll be, and keep an eye on your drink. A quick video call beforehand helps confirm who you're meeting. If anything feels off, you can leave at any time.
None of this means expecting the worst. Most dates are just dates. These habits make it easier to relax, because the basics are already covered. And if something bad does happen, it is the fault of the person who did it, not you.
Video chat first. A short video call is an easy way to check that someone matches their photos and that you enjoy talking. If a match keeps finding reasons to avoid a call or a meeting, take note. The Federal Trade Commission (FTC) warns that romance scammers often say they can't meet in person.
Do a little research. South Australia Police suggests finding out how your dating app verifies identities and doing a reverse image search on your date's profile photo to check it's genuine.
Keep personal details private. The same advice warns against oversharing about yourself, your family or your friends on a first date. Your home address and workplace can wait.
Charge your phone. Leave home with a full battery so you can call, text or get a ride.
This is one of the easiest first date safety tips to follow. South Australia Police suggests sharing your date's details with someone you trust, including:
Where and when you're meeting, plus any change of plans
The name your date is using and a profile picture
When to expect to hear from you
It also suggests sharing your live location with friends or family, and asking a friend to call at a set time so you have an easy "out" if you want one.
Example text to a friend: "Coffee with Sam at Riverside Cafe, 2 to 4 today. Profile pic attached. I'll text you by 4:30. If you don't hear from me, call."
Busy and well lit. Pick a public place with other people around, like a cafe, market or museum.
Short and simple. South Australia Police calls a cafe meetup ideal for a first meeting.
Somewhere you know. A familiar spot means you know the area and how to get home. If your date is traveling to meet you, the same advice suggests they come to you and stay in a hotel, not with you.
Not at home. Skip meeting at either person's home, and don't invite them back to yours afterward.
Arrange your own transport both ways, whether that's your own car, transit, a rideshare or a friend. Don't rely on your date for a ride, and don't let them drive you home. That way you can leave whenever you want without needing anyone's help.
Keep an eye on your drink. "Drink spiking can happen to anyone," South Australia Police notes. If you lose sight of your drink, order a fresh one.
Stay clear-headed. Drink only as much as still lets you think and react clearly, or skip alcohol entirely.
Know that a drink is not a yes. loveisrespect explains that flirting, or accepting a ride, gift or drink, doesn't mean someone has agreed to anything. Pressure, guilt-tripping or anger at a "no" are red flags.
Trust your instincts. "If something doesn't feel right, then it's probably not," the police advice says. "It's OK to leave."
Easy exit lines: "I'm going to head out. Take care." Or: "I don't think we're a match, but thanks for meeting me." You don't owe anyone a long reason. If you feel unsafe, ask staff for help, and in an emergency call 911 in the US.
The UK government's spiking guidance lists signs such as confusion or disorientation, nausea or vomiting, hallucinations or paranoia, poor coordination or blurred vision, trouble communicating, and memory loss or blackouts.
Get medical help fast. Call emergency services (911 in the US, 999 in the UK) and ask staff or people you trust to help.
Look after a friend. If it happens to someone you're with, get them help, stay with them and see them home once they're well enough.
Report it early. The same guidance notes that some drugs leave the body within about 12 hours, so reporting quickly helps. Reporting later is still worth it.
Some "matches" aren't looking for a date at all. The FTC says romance scammers often:
Want to move quickly off the dating app to email, calls or messages
Say they can't meet in person, often because they live or work overseas
Ask for money for emergencies, travel or fees, or offer to help you invest in cryptocurrency
Want payment by wire transfer, gift cards, payment apps or crypto
The FTC's rule is clear: never send money or gifts to someone you haven't met in person. You can report scams at ReportFraud.ftc.gov.
Video call done
Busy public place chosen
Friend knows who, where and when
Own way there and home
Phone charged
Drink in sight
Exit line ready
It's a good idea. A short call helps confirm the person is who they say they are and makes meeting in person feel less awkward.
Yes. Share who you're meeting, where and when, and agree on a time you'll check in.
No. A polite goodbye is enough. Your safety and comfort come first.
Leave, ask venue staff for help or call a friend. If you're in immediate danger, call 911. If someone you're dating threatens, hurts or controls you, the National Domestic Violence Hotline is available at 1-800-799-7233 or thehotline.org.
SecondYes: Second Date Planner is for adults who have already met and want to plan the next date. It is not a dating app, so there are no profiles, matching or strangers, and it needs no account. Its invitations are private links, but anyone with a link can open it, so share it only with the person you're inviting.
Get SecondYes free on the App Store