INSITE Newsletter

Welcome to the INSITE newsletter.

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Emotional Regulation

 Emotions are helpful and important. They communicate information to us about our environment and our experience. Goals of Emotional Regulation include: naming and understanding our own emotions, decrease the frequency of unpleasant emotions, decrease our vulnerability to emotions, and decrease emotional suffering.

STOP Skill

The STOP skill consists of the following sequence: Stop, Take a step back, Observe, Proceed mindfully.

Stop

When you feel that your emotions seem to be in control, stop! Don’t react. Don’t move a muscle. Just freeze especially those muscles around the mouth. Freezing for a moment helps prevent you from doing what your emotions want you to do (which is to act without thinking). Stay in control. Remember, you are the boss of your emotions. Name the emotion – put a label on it.

Take A Step Back

When you are faced with a difficult situation, it may be hard to think about how to deal with it on the spot. Give yourself some time to calm down and think. Take a step back from the situation. Get unstuck from what is going on. Take a deep breath and continue breathing deeply as long as you need and until you are in control. Do not let your emotions control what you do. It is the rare incident, indeed, wherein we need to make a split-second decision about anything. Hence, it is okay to take our time to decide how to respond.

Observe

Observe what is happening around you and within you, who is involved, and what are other people doing or saying. Listen to the Automatic Negative Thoughts (ANTs) that occur…remember those are based on an outdated Belief System that was programmed before you were seven. To make effective choices, it is important NOT to jump to conclusions. Instead, gather the relevant facts so you can understand what is going on and what options are available.

Proceed Mindfully

Ask yourself, “What do I want from this situation?” or “What are my goals?” or “What choice might make this situation better or worse?” or “What act will allow for success?” Stay calm, stay in control, and when you have some information and how that may impact your goals, you will be better prepared to deal with the situation effectively. Remember your brain needs time to think all of this through.

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Deep Shadow Work Prompts To Accept Yourself And Move Forward

Have you ever reacted to a situation or a seemingly innocuous comment and wondered why you got so worked up? You’re not the only one. According to research by Carl Jung1, what’s happening here is likely a response from your repressed shadow self.

To begin understanding the deep inner workings of how you show up in the world, many people go through the healing process of shadow work and find it transformational!

What is Shadow Work?

Shadow work consists of reflecting on your subconscious’s repressed beliefs and perceptions and pushing through the resistance to work through the issues holding you back from better mental health and integrated life.

According to research by Carl Jung, your shadow, otherwise known as your subconscious self, influences how you operate in the world and, in some cases, leaves you unaware of the deeper motives behind your actions or how you project yourself. Therefore, by facing your shadows, you gain power over them.

“It is often tragic to see how blatantly a man bungles his own life and the lives of others yet remains totally incapable of seeing how much the whole tragedy originates in himself and how he continually feeds it and keeps it going.”

—Carl Jung, Psyche, and Symbol: A Selection from the Writings of C.G. Jung

Why Do Shadow Work?

As you begin to understand your subconscious ego through shadow work, you can better overcome addictions and understand the root cause of your relational issues, among other things.

The common purpose for shadow work are:

Exploring and understanding your past traumas

Identifying and overcoming your limiting beliefs

Examining patterns of behavior in your relationships

For example, let’s say you notice that you’re triggered when someone says something seemingly harmless, like, “Wow. What a bold outfit.” Maybe you start to feel your blood pressure go up and your body temperature rise, but you may not even understand the root of why this is happening.

Once you’re able to identify how your shadow self is projecting itself into the world, you can surface the shame you feel about parts of your subconscious identity and go through the process of healing.

By going through the process of deep shadow work, you may discover that your reaction could stem from growing up and being shamed for being bold, loud, and talkative. As a result, you have since felt inferior when others point out the part of you that you have tried to subconsciously hide or reject about yourself due to shame.

What Are The Benefits of Shadow Work?

The benefits of going through the process of shadow work in psychotherapy influence your brain in such a way that it can function at a healthier level. Some of the benefits include2:

Increased self-awareness and authenticity

Improved emotional intelligence

Self-acceptance and compassion

Healthier relationships

Reduced stress and anxiety

Increased confidence

Greater creativity

Clarity around goals

Shadow work has great benefits, especially when you know how to set goals with your shadow work. Learn how to set better goals with this helpful resource

What Are Shadow Work Prompts?

Shadow work prompts are questions that help you tap into the emotions, beliefs, perceptions and sometimes dark thoughts that are repressed within your subconscious. The purpose of these questions is to help you start the process of healing and living a fully integrated life.

Use shadow work question prompts like the ones below in journaling, creative expression (art, music, dance, etc.), the context of a safe relationship, or with a professional therapist. For example, you might try a process like this:

Choose two or three shadow work question prompts to think through.

Spend five to ten minutes reflecting on the memories each prompt brings up.

Note the feelings in your body, and explore the emotions you’re experiencing.

Get out your journal or art supplies, and start writing down (or painting, playing, dancing) what comes to mind and let it all out.

Take five to ten minutes afterward to read back or look back on your work.

Pay attention to any common themes or new learnings and write them down.

At this point, a great way to close your process might be to sit in meditation.

Shadow work is a powerful tool for personal growth and transformation, but it’s not necessarily easy. However, the benefits far outweigh the difficulty and include a greater sense of well-being and life satisfaction. Before you get started, please remember to be patient and gentle with yourself!

shadow work prompts are great for when you first start out because they help you slowly get into self-reflection if it’s not something you’re used to yet.

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"De-activity" vs  Reactivity

Reactivity is an immediate response to a stressor or conflict with intense emotional reactions (usually anger) rather than regulating your emotion. "De-activity", a term coined by psychotherapist Ed Geraty LCSW-C, is a mindfulness process which, with practice, helps an individual to both decrease the immediate adrenaline rush (fight response) and bring thought into the experience. The individual then becomes a responder rather than a reactor; being able to respond to a conflict in ways that are helpful and thoughtful.

Intense reactors usually learn this behavior when they have grown up in a family where one or more parents expressed immediate intense reactions. The child learns by example.

The De-activity process is simple but NOT EASY.  It's not easy because the brain, over many years or repetitive experience, has become wired to be reactive. The good news is the concept of neuroplasticity; the ability of the brain to rewire itself with consistent practice.

Here's how the process works:

1. As soon as you feel an intense emotion (usually anger) you stop and take 5 or 6 deep breaths (this immediately begins to reduce the increase of adrenaline flowing through your body).

2. Ask yourself  "What emotion am I feeling?"  NAME it to yourself.

3. Ask yourself "What do I need to do about this emotion?"  (This brings rational thought into the experience).

4. Then follow through.. it may be doing nothing, it may be letting the person know you're feeling angry, it may be taking a break, etc.  This way you become a responder to your emotion rather than a reactor.

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Executive Function coaching is an approach designed to bolster your cognitive abilities and optimize your performance across various domains of life. By developing skills like working memory, cognitive flexibility, and self-regulation, this coaching empowers you to navigate tasks, challenges, and goals with confidence and efficiency.

Through a collaborative process, you and I identify areas for growth and develop strategies to enhance your executive function skills. Coaching equips you with the tools and techniques necessary for success whether you're aiming for academic excellence, professional advancement, or simply seeking to streamline your daily routines.

Key components of this Executive Functioning coaching include:

Assessment and Goal Setting: We begin by assessing your current executive function skills and identifying areas for improvement. Together, we set clear and achievable goals to guide our coaching journey.

Skill Development: The coaching focuses on developing essential executive function skills such as organization, planning, prioritization, time management, and self-control. Through targeted exercises and strategies, you'll strengthen these skills and enhance your overall cognitive functioning.

Strategy Implementation: You and I work collaboratively to implement effective strategies tailored to your specific challenges and goals. Whether it's creating structured routines, utilizing digital tools, or adopting mindfulness techniques, we identify and implement strategies that work best for you.

Progress Monitoring: Throughout the coaching process, we track your progress and make adjustments as needed to ensure continued growth and success. Regular check-ins and feedback sessions allow us to fine-tune our approach and address any emerging challenges.

Empowerment and Support: The coaching approach is rooted in empowerment and support. I provide encouragement, guidance, and accountability to help you stay motivated and focused on your journey towards achieving your goals.

By investing in executive function coaching, you're investing in your future success and well-being. With coaching and support, you'll unlock your full potential and navigate life's challenges with confidence and competence.

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Listen to my Spotify podcast and spend time meditating focused on a number of topics: 

https://open.spotify.com/show/12Ih8RyF5samtPrCMrAN2r?si=3db62cebd0c6489b

Do Nothing Meditation

Doing Nothing, and Doing It Well!

Most forms of mindfulness meditation require effort, whether it’s the focused attention of concentration practices or the more broad awareness encouraged by practices like Non-Duality. In fact, one of the main criticisms of mindfulness is that it can seem to vilify the idea of daydreaming and suggest that letting the mind wander naturally is a bad thing.

This is a slight misconception –mindfulness simply creates a space in which to focus on taming the mind and thinking differently, if only for a few minutes each day – but it’s true that we often place too much pressure and intention on our meditation practice.

 “Do Nothing” meditation is all about moving away from that notion.

Now, it’s worth noting early on that the words ‘Do’ and ‘Nothing’ are inherently opposites. At any one moment, you are always breathing, or moving, even in some barely identifiable way. So why is the idea of “Doing Nothing” so ingrained in both modern society and culture and in ancient meditative practices?

The Art of Doing Nothing

Do Nothing” technique insists that this type of meditation should include the suffix “with time”. In other words, this is a practice that one gradually develops a knack for in the long term. With time, you’ll develop a sensitivity for the part of you that controls attention.” But we’ll get more into the benefits of this type of meditation soon; first, let’s take you through the basics of how it actually works.

“Do Nothing” meditation represents the opposite of standard mindfulness meditation; instead of creating a state of calmness by focusing on the breath or another anchor, meditators practice simply letting their minds go wherever they like, without control or disruption.

Various terms have been coined in relation to this meditation practice, including “choiceless awareness” or “Just sitting”, which derives from the Zen practice of Shikantaza. Its principles have been employed in a number of different spiritual traditions, including the Tibetan Buddhist practice of Dzogchen (meaning “great completeness”), which encourages meditators to reach a space of emptiness or “purity” in order to understand the true nature of existence.

Another similar technique is the concept of radical acceptance, which teaches that only by accepting the things that are out of our control can we truly end suffering.

Clearly then, this is an idea that humans have been considering for a long time. But it might still sound a little airy-fairy and difficult to grasp — if that’s the case, don’t worry. Later on this blog post, we’ll take you through exactly how to create a “Do Nothing” experience for yourself. But first, let’s briefly consider the science behind this meditative method.

The Neuroscience of Doing Nothing

A lecture by American neuroscientist and psychiatrist Judson Brewer explains how humans can benefit from flow states in which we’re focusing on nothing in particular and instead wrapped up in the joy of just “being”. There’s science to back this idea up. MRI brain scans show that the activity of the PCC (posterior cingulate cortex) decreases when we let go of the feeling of doing anything.

 This means that the default mode network, which can cause stress and other negative feelings, is less active. The more it feels like things are just effortlessly happening, the more your default mode network slows down, which boosts your levels of happiness and peace of mind. This is one of the many positive effects meditation can have on human brain structure and the brainwaves we experience.

The “Do Nothing” Meditation Technique

During meditation, thoughts, memories, worries, pains, itches, and a million other distractions come up. “Do Nothing” practices encourage us to simply accept all of these things. Whether what we’re experiencing is boring, neutral, negative, or positive, the trick is to not resist any of it or judge anything as bad. Your mind can ruminate on stories, escalate into monkey chatter, or do anything else — and this is the whole technique!

According to Meditation teacher Shinzen Young, the instruction stage for this meditative practice should essentially amount to two sentences:

Let whatever happens happen.

As soon as you’re aware of an intention to control your attention, drop that intention.

The first instruction is all about allowing sensory experiences to happen, whatever they are. You could get sleepy or restless, you could get lost in monkey mind, or you could have very little clarity. All these things are okay — let them happen.

Don’t worry about where your mind goes while you’re sitting. It can go to all sorts of distractions, and that’s fine. The main thing is that you’re not making a concerted effort to meditate, focus, or concentrate in any way.

The instruction “As soon as you’re aware of an intention to control your attention, drop that intention” might sound like it’s encouraging you to monitor whether or not you have intentions; however, this isn’t the case. This is because if you’re actively trying to seek out and drop intentions, you’re actually doing two things, rather than doing one, or even nothing. Instead, this form of meditation is just about sitting and allowing the mind to wander.

It’s also okay to be unaware of your own intentions. You can’t force it; you have to wait for the awareness to be there. This could take just a few seconds, but it could also take a long time. When you do become aware of a particular intention, “do nothing” meditation asks you to drop this thought or idea, letting go of it in order to simply “be”.

How long should I practice for?

When you first try this technique, you should set aside 10-15 minutes for it. As you become more comfortable and the process becomes a little easier to get into, you can extend the period of time you spend practicing. Given the free, liberated principle that remains at the core of this form of meditation, you might not be surprised to hear that the period of time you spend practicing this technique can vary immensely depending on your individual circumstances and needs.

There’s no end goal, and you definitely don’t have to be searching for some kind of spiritual awakening or enlightenment. Crucially, there’s no “wrong” way of doing this kind of meditation. Just let go of intentions, and let go of control.

Why “try” to do nothing?

Most forms of meditation seem to focus on cultivating a state of mind that wasn’t there before you started that particular meditation method. But what about the innate capacity for inner peace and happiness that’s already inside us? Shouldn’t we be able to access awakening without even trying?

The type of meditation we’ve focused on today is all about cultivating a form of effortlessness. This can lead to flow states, in which we are entirely “in the zone”, engaged with the task at hand and able to perform it with no visible effort. Not only are these states great for creativity, open-mindedness, and general well-being, they can also help reduce feelings of irritability, impatience, frustration, and forgetfulness.

As we mentioned earlier, the “Do Nothing” technique can also help take the pressure away from meditation, which is often what gets in the way of effective practice. Our belief that we must always be doing something, completing tasks, and striving forwards, is what drives the ego. This can get in the way of us noticing or experiencing more profound states of mind.

When we let go of the need for action and instead “do nothing”, our egoic voice quietens, and the attitude change this causes can be immense.

What if it doesn’t work?

First, it cant not work because there is no goal to achieve. It’s possible that you’ll find this type of meditation hard. You could end up just sitting there, thinking about current problems and difficult experiences, considering what you’re going to have for lunch, or just getting sleepy and tired, without getting much deeper into meditation.

There are a few things you might end up doing that signal intentional thinking, and that you should try and shift away from if you become aware of them:

Actively trying to meditate

Trying to focus on something specifically

Intentionally thinking about a certain topic

Keeping track of the time or tracking events that are happening

Focusing on a certain sight or sound within your environment

If you find yourself doing one of these things, first of all, don’t beat yourself up about it! It’s totally natural for the mind to drift towards intentional thoughts and behaviors, so it takes practice to just “do nothing” instead.

One good fix you can try if this problem strikes you is to use breath awareness as a gateway into your meditation session. Spend 10 minutes or so focusing on the breath (check out this article for some advice on the best breathwork techniques out there), and hopefully, you’ll gently transition into a more natural form of “do nothing” meditation. Another thing you can try is defocusing your gaze, keeping your eyes open but allowing them to blur, and letting yourself space out a little.

Getting Something from Nothing

Many people believe that “real meditation” is simply about letting go of control and breaking away from the human need to constantly guide our own experience. Mindfulness meditation can be great for developing ways to control our chaotic minds and ground ourselves in present moment experience; however, calmness and peace can also be achieved by simply letting our minds go where they like.

You can think of your mind as an energetic dog who you’ve let off the leash at a park.

They’ll run around like crazy for a while, but if you just sit on a bench calmly waiting for them to get tired, they will eventually come back to you. In the same way, taking an effortless approach to meditation might lead to all sorts of crazy thoughts at first, but in the end, your internal monologue will hopefully settle down.

When it comes to thriving and surviving in an intense, busy, constantly interconnected world, one of the best things you can do is learn how to do nothing. Aimlessness, rest, and boredom can be great sources of inspiration and creativity, while thinking without an open mind can create tunnel vision and stop you from accomplishing your goals. Ultimately, the brain needs downtime in order to process the events of a day, store memories and experiences, recuperate, and ensure it is performing at its optimum level.

We need to look after our emotional and mental health and give our brains the rest they need; “do nothing” meditation can be a great way of making this process more natural

Frequently Asked Questions:

Is meditating just doing nothing?

The term ‘meditation’ encompasses a huge range of different practices, from various different spiritual traditions and cultural contexts. Some of these involve doing nothing, while others require intense levels of concentration. To improve your knowledge on this subject, check out our article on the six main types of meditation.

How do I train myself to do nothing?

As we’ve explored, it can be difficult to feel comfortable doing nothing. You may need to train yourself to move away from human habits of busyness and action, and mindfulness noting practices of breathing techniques can be a great way to do this. Our article on Quick Mindfulness Exercises You Can Do Anywhere can provide you with some useful ideas.

What’s the difference between mindfulness and meditation?

We’ve talked a lot in this article about how “Do Nothing” meditation differs from most mindfulness practices, and you might be a little confused about the distinctions between mindfulness and meditation. Put simply, meditation is a formal practice, while mindfulness can be a quality of mind as well as a form of meditative exercise.

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Executive Function coaching is an approach designed to bolster your cognitive abilities and optimize your performance across various domains of life. By developing skills like working memory, cognitive flexibility, and self-regulation, this coaching empowers you to navigate tasks, challenges, and goals with confidence and efficiency.

Through a collaborative process, you and I identify areas for growth and develop strategies to enhance your executive function skills. Coaching equips you with the tools and techniques necessary for success whether you're aiming for academic excellence, professional advancement, or simply seeking to streamline your daily routines.

Key components of this Executive Functioning coaching include:

Assessment and Goal Setting: We begin by assessing your current executive function skills and identifying areas for improvement. Together, we set clear and achievable goals to guide our coaching journey.

Skill Development: The coaching focuses on developing essential executive function skills such as organization, planning, prioritization, time management, and self-control. Through targeted exercises and strategies, you'll strengthen these skills and enhance your overall cognitive functioning.

Strategy Implementation: You and I work collaboratively to implement effective strategies tailored to your specific challenges and goals. Whether it's creating structured routines, utilizing digital tools, or adopting mindfulness techniques, we identify and implement strategies that work best for you.

Progress Monitoring: Throughout the coaching process, we track your progress and make adjustments as needed to ensure continued growth and success. Regular check-ins and feedback sessions allow us to fine-tune our approach and address any emerging challenges.

Empowerment and Support: The coaching approach is rooted in empowerment and support. I provide encouragement, guidance, and accountability to help you stay motivated and focused on your journey towards achieving your goals.

By investing in executive function coaching, you're investing in your future success and well-being. With coaching and support, you'll unlock your full potential and navigate life's challenges with confidence and competence.


View my educational YouTube videos

The Deficiency Story

https://youtu.be/qckmO1hUT7s?si=V5bTN5-QEWvRxuQQ

Spiritual Emergencies

https://youtu.be/WLzklqr2ljo

Mindfulness-based Cognitive Therapy

https://youtu.be/indqhRJsHK0

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There are many resources, handouts, etc on my website resource page 

https://sites.google.com/view/insiteintegrativeservicesllc/resources-and-handouts?authuser=0

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                                                               Couples  Fair Fighting Rules

 

Rules or guidelines for fighting fair may help you come away from an argument or conflict with a better understanding of yourself, the other person, and both of your goals and needs. Rules include things like being open, staying focused, and sharing your emotions.

 

Here are sixteen rules for fair fighting

 

1. Stay Focused On the Issue at Hand

 

When an issue is escalating, try to keep your discussion streamlined. Doing so minimizes the likelihood that you will bring non-related issues into the conversation, which can only lead to further distress and irritation. By not bringing up past hurts and conflicts, you give yourself a better chance at resolving the current issue and moving forward with your future.

 

2. Talk Openly About the Problem

 

Shutting down, not fully engaging with the other person, and not devoting sufficient time to the matter won’t lead to a resolution. Make sure you give each other enough time and space to talk through the problem so everyone feels heard, respected, valued, and supported.

 

3. Share Your Feelings & Emotions

 

Are you angry? Sad? Scared? Frustrated? Lonely? Tell the other person how you are feeling. This promotes emotional intimacy and bonding. Showing vulnerability will keep you from becoming closed off from one another.

 

4. Listen to Each Other Without Interrupting & Pay Attention to Body Language

 

Listening to each other without interruption allows both people to get their points across clearly and demonstrates mutual appreciation. Also, notice the other person’s facial expressions, gestures, tone of voice, speed of speech, and body positioning. Similarly, pay attention to your own body language in a tense situation.

 

5. Respect the Other Person’s Perspective

 

Even if you don’t agree with the other person, respect their thoughts, opinions, feelings, and ideas about how to move forward. Getting outside of your own mindset will help you see things from another point of view and can help you both take that first step toward positive change.

 

6. Reach a Compromise or Problem-solve to Find a Solution Together

 

You both might start to dig your heels into the ground about being “right.” Remember, there is no right or wrong, and insisting there is only further drives a wedge between you. Focus on reaching a mutually agreed upon compromise or solution that you can both feel good about.

 

7. Be Open About Your Needs, Expectations, Hopes, & Goals

 

Try being open about what you need in the relationship, your expectations, and your hopes and goals for the future (e.g., living situation, travel, family composition, career aspirations, financial goals, retirement, etc.). These are all things that you will want to get on the same page about to reduce the likelihood of future arguments and misunderstandings.

 

8. Focus On Issues That Are a Priority For You Both & Leave the Rest

 

Let go of matters that aren’t a huge priority for you; instead, devote more time to the core concerns that you both feel need to be addressed.

 

9. Be Mindful of the Time You Choose to Discuss a Problem

 

Starting an important discussion at the end of the day or early in the morning may not be the best idea. Consider discussing the problem at a time of day when you both feel like you can discuss the matter without too much interruption, a time when your focus, attention, and energy levels are ideal.

 

10. Take a Break if Needed to Calm Down & Commit to Resuming Later

 

Go to a different room or space in the home to give yourself space to relax. Make a plan to return to the discussion when you both feel more at ease. This could be later the same day or perhaps another day or evening after you have some time to think about the issue. To fully resolve the issue, you must devote a sufficient amount of time.

 

11. Don’t Stonewall Your Partner

 

Stonewalling, shutting down and refusing to talk to your partner, is a really harsh way of existing in conflict. Shutting your partner out sends a message that you do not value their opinion and in a time of conflict, that can do much more damage and make the conflict worse. It’s important to refrain from stonewalling as it also leaves your partner feeling isolated and alone in conflict, which doesn’t help anyone.

 

12. Set Clear Boundaries: Do Not Yell, Degrade, Threaten, or Curse

 

Raising your voice, threatening to leave or end the relationship, or swearing at the other person can only cause further divide and distress. Depending on the severity of the issue, responding this way can eventually lead to a point of no return. It is best to set healthy boundaries, stay calm, and focus on the key issue at hand to avoid the risk of saying something you’ll regret.

 

13. Take Responsibility For Your Role In the Disagreement

 

This helps maintain accountability and allows you both to see where your own biases, struggles, and expectations come into play. By owning your challenges, it shows that you recognize that you may also need to make some adjustments. Both people need to work on the areas where they would like to improve.

 

14. Manage Feelings of Resentment

 

Holding grudges and resentment can be detrimental to your relationship. Try to proactively deal with the issue and then move on. Circling back to past issues and challenges can have a negative effect on your relationship.

 

15. Don’t Make Assumptions

 

Sometimes, we try to fill in the gaps based on what we assume the other person is thinking or feeling. However, our assumptions stem from our own personal experiences, beliefs, and values, which may greatly differ from someone else’s. Rather than making assumptions or trying to “mind read,” which can further increase our frustration and anger, ask the other person about their viewpoints, concerns, and needs.

 

16. Move On After Resolving a Problem

 

Try not to dwell on the issue once you’ve reached a resolution. Moving on from it allows you and the other person to focus on your future relationship goals while also growing and deepening your connection.

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Emotional Flooding and Techniques to Manage the Flooding

Emotional flooding, also known as emotional overwhelm, refers to a state in which an individual becomes inundated by intense emotions that feel difficult to manage or control. It can occur in response to various situations, such as traumatic events, highly stressful circumstances, or even during moments of extreme joy.

When someone experiences emotional flooding, they may feel a range of intense emotions all at once, which can make it challenging to think clearly or make rational decisions. This can lead to a heightened state of arousal, where the person might feel physically tense, have a racing heart, experience difficulty breathing, or even have a sense of panic.

Emotional flooding often occurs in response to triggering events or situations that tap into deeper emotional issues or past traumas. People may also experience emotional flooding during conflicts, grief, major life changes, or moments of vulnerability.

To cope with emotional flooding, some strategies include:

Deep Breathing: Focusing on slow, deep breaths can help regulate the nervous system and calm the body's physiological response to overwhelming emotions.(see more below)

Mindfulness and Grounding Techniques: Engaging in mindfulness practices or grounding exercises can help bring one's attention back to the present moment and reduce the intensity of emotions.

Physical Activity: Engaging in physical activities like walking, jogging, or yoga can help release pent-up energy and stress.

Talking to Someone: Sharing feelings with a supportive friend, family member, or therapist can provide an outlet for emotions and offer perspective.

Journaling: Writing down thoughts and feelings can help process and release overwhelming emotions.

Taking Breaks: Stepping away from the triggering situation or environment can give one time to cool down and regain composure.

It's important to remember that experiencing emotional flooding from time to time is a normal human response, but if it consistently interferes with your daily functioning or well-being, seeking professional help is recommended.

Deep Breathing: Focus on your breath. Take slow, deep breaths in through your nose and out through your mouth. Pay attention to the sensation of the breath entering and leaving your body. This can help regulate your nervous system and create a sense of calm.

Body Scan: Start from the top of your head and gradually move your attention down through your body, noticing any areas of tension, discomfort, or sensations. This helps you connect with your body and ground yourself in the present moment.

Labeling Emotions: As you experience intense emotions, give them names. Say to yourself, "I am feeling anger," "I am feeling sadness," etc. This simple act of labeling can create a bit of distance between you and the emotion.

5-4-3-2-1 Grounding Technique: Identify five things you can see, four things you can touch, three things you can hear, two things you can smell, and one thing you can taste. This technique helps redirect your focus away from overwhelming emotions and into your immediate surroundings.

Mindful Observation: Choose an object in your environment and observe it closely. Pay attention to its colors, textures, shapes, and any details you might not have noticed before. This practice helps you shift your attention away from your emotions.

Thought or Urge Surfing: Imagine your thoughts and emotions as waves in the ocean. As they rise, acknowledge them without trying to control or suppress them. Watch them as they peak and eventually subside, like waves crashing on the shore.

Grounding in the Senses: Engage your senses by focusing on the sensations around you. Notice the feeling of your feet on the ground, the temperature of the air, the sounds in your environment, and any scents or tastes you can detect.

Mindful Walking: Take a slow walk and pay attention to the sensation of your feet touching the ground. Notice the rhythm of your steps and any sensations in your body as you move.

Breathing Space: Take a few moments to pause and focus on your breath. Then, expand your awareness to your body and any sensations you're experiencing. Finally, widen your focus to your thoughts and emotions without getting caught up in them.

Loving-Kindness Meditation: Send feelings of love, compassion, and kindness to yourself and others. This can help create a sense of emotional balance and connection.

Remember that mindfulness is a skill that takes practice, so be patient with yourself as you incorporate these techniques into your daily routine. Regular practice can help you build resilience and improve your ability to manage emotional flooding effectively.

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Ed Geraty LCSW-C, LICSW