A Shadow By Any Other Name
Within a forest of deep, thick, bloodriver woods stands
a gargantuan redwood among the grove,
Within a forest of deep, thick, bloodriver woods stands
a gargantuan redwood among the grove,
Which seats my Mind Palace of wood and iron and stone,
Where I alone in my hearthchamber,
Lit only by the fire of my core,
Paced about the singed floor until
inklings of my memories began whispering.
Cooing urges like windsong to me from their shelves and cabinets
became abundantly clear,
“Go right ahead." They said.
"Face the mirror.”
I hesitated,
Yet I gazed with intent ponderings into my mirror,
Past the charcoal-stained frame
that smells of pine needles and tears,
Interrogating my Shadow’s brightly hazel eyes to ask,
the wolfish beast which dwells within,
Has more than ample ears to hear what I have to say.
"Who...?
Who are you, really?
Kindly answer me swiftly."
"I am you.
The you who sleeps in the shadows of your wake.
The you who wakes fully at night, favoring full moons."
What is it you want?
I want what you want.
What your body, your mind, and your very soul crave.
Have you forgotten I am your Instincts?
Within me is much of your fight and passion behind fangs
raving for what you sorely lack.
I have not forgotten, yet I wonder.
I wonder why you won’t remain tame.
We’ve bared our fangs far too much lately.
"You cannot fully dictate me,
As neither can I fully dictate you.
You know the companionship you seek;
A proper mate to protect, care for and lay with at night.
One that won’t betray you and bleed you as she did."
"She’s dead to me."
"Not to me."
"Why must you be so difficult since she left?"
"Because you remember and I respond in kind."
"How do I leash you, so you won’t run rampant?"
"Leash me? You know you sometimes need me to act freely."
"This is true, and yet, you still need to be restrained other times."
"She could do it, so you think you can’t do the same alone."
"You’re fortunate that I don’t tighten the lock on your enclosure.
You'd be let out more if you weren't constantly scratching at the walls."
"Please, you wouldn’t do it if you could. You know you can’t resist forever.
It’s been easier to forgive her than yourself, because of what’s occurred.
Despite everything she’s done that you didn’t deserve, you don’t truly desire to hate her,
therefore, you default to fear
Fear that I’ll burst forth in such a way that others will see us as a monster."
"How would they not?"
"You know better than I, Wolfie. It is... as always, your choice."