TO BE ABLE TO - language techniques in your writing to describe what is happening rather than plainly saying what is happening
what is show don't tell?
‘Telling’ is quick but boring.
‘Show’ to convince your reader. It is more engaging.
Be specific – focusing on one person or object gives us an instant picture.
The best way to do show, don't tell is to use language techniques and never use the name of the topic you want to show.
Task 1 - Mind Map - copy this mind map with me
Examples of Language Techniques
Task 2 - Short Films that use Show, Don't Tell
We are going to watch two videos and consider what they are telling us by considering what they are showing.
reach
This video told us that -
By showing us -
johnny express
This video told us that -
By showing us -
task 3 - using language techniques to show and not tell
Write one sentence using a simile to describe the scene where the robot disconnected from the power cord. You cannot use the words unplugged or disconnected.
Examples -
Write one or more sentences using imagery to describe the scene where Johnny was destroying the city by walking. You cannot use the words destroyed, walked or stepped.
Examples -
Write one or more sentences using a imagery to describe the scene where the robot realises it is alive by looking at its hands. You cannot use the words looked or realised.
Examples -
Write one or more sentences using onomatopoeia to describe the scene where the alien is running away from the can. You cannot use the words destroyed, screamed or yelled.
Examples -
Write one sentence using a metaphor to describe the scene where the robot is pulling the power source along to get to the window. You cannot use the words unplugged or disconnected.
Examples -
Write one or more sentences using imagery to describe the setting of inside Johnny's space ship You cannot use the words messy or rubbish.
Examples -
task 4 - writing challange
Your task is to write me a four sentence short story on one of the following topics:
THE CHALLENGE IS YOU CANNOT SAY the forbidden word that goes with your topic.
That means you are going to have to use Show, Don't Tell and language techniques to tell your story.
The topics
A cow that can fly
(For this topic, you can't use the word fly)
a surfer than comes face to face with a mermaid
(For this topic, you can't use the word mermaid)
a football player kicking a field goal in extra time to win the game
(For this topic, you can't use the word kick)
A tree that dances when you play music near it
(For this topic, you can't use the word dance)
WE WILL SHARE OUR SHORT STORIES USING THE SPINNING WHEEL
Lesson 2
Step 5 - Show, Don't Tell continued
to know - show, don't tell
to be able to - use descriptive writing to show instead of tell using the four steps of show, don't tell
why do we use show, don't tell?
How to write with emotions using show, don't tell
Write down the steps, the instructions and the examples.
Step 1
Write what you want readers to know (tell):
I would have stayed on the pier forever if I could.
Step 2
Write a list of what that feeling you want them to experience is:
Comfort, nostalgic, sad in a good way, missing, longing, relaxing
Step 3
Take your list and write ways a person would express those emotions
Nostalgic - aching, remembering
Longing - letting go, craving, relinquishing
Relaxing - melted, easy, flowing, exhaling
Step 4
Take your list and rewrite your telling sentence to show readers what you want them to feel:
I melted into the beach at the end of the pier, watching the sun wink through treetops as it relinquished itself into the night. My breath flowed fluidly once again.
Task 1 - how did mr bean feel?
While we are watching the video, write down the emotions Mr Bean felt during the exam. We will share at the end.
using show, don't tell with emotion
Step 1 - In one sentence, what did the author of this text want to tell the audience?
Emotions Mr bean felt How that emotion can be expressed
(Step 2) (Step 3)
Take the idea from your step 1 sentence and write four sentences showing the reader how mr bean felt during the exam. Be ready to share. make sure to use show, don't tell and show what he felt instead of saying it.
(Step 4)
Task 2 - Use the four steps of show, don't tell to rewrite these telling sentences to make them more descriptive
I love going to the circus, it's my favourite time of year when the circus comes to town.
It was the hottest day of summer and the airconditioning in our car wasn't working.
I was in a dark field, surrounded by strange aliens walking towards me.
The library was completely silent was the teacher moved around the room.
Be ready to share your answers, we will be using the spinning wheel.