Highlights of 2019

JANUARY: The year got off to a rocky start around the ol' homestead, with two crises narrowly averted. A New Year's Day attempt at beignets resulted in Kyle almost burning down the house. Seriously, it was fortunate our guest roster happened to feature a legitimate fireman, because the grease fire was sizable. (Per Kyle, "I remembered you were not supposed to put water on it, but I had no idea what you were supposed to do." For those following along at home, the correct answer is 'smother it.')

Just a few days later, while returning Christmas decorations to an isolated basement storage room, we discovered an unexpected house guest. Billy the Bat was first misidentified by a ShopVac-wielding Kyle as an errant piece of insulation. As soon as Kyle realized it was in fact a dead bat, he ran out of the room screaming like a little girl. As our resident dead animal remover, Katie stepped in to knock down the suspended carcass. Imagine our surprise when the carcass awoke from its winter slumber and bared his fangs in an insolent manner. At this point, we both ran out of the room screaming like little girls. A heroic, and shockingly gloveless, woman from animal control evicted Billy in a coffee can. And, several days later, we were particularly relieved to hear that his rabies test came back negative. Fortunately for Pierce, that meant no mandatory quarantine. Unfortunately for Billy, it meant no longer having a head attached to his body. R.I.P. Billy.