Merritt Opening Song: #44 Morning Has Broken Title: Margaret’s Trial
Scripture: Isaiah 38:14, I cried like a swift or thrush, I moaned like a mourning dove. My eyes grew weak as I looked to the heavens. I am troubled; O Lord, come to my aid!"
Three students were attending their first class on emotional extremes. Professor asked, "What is the opposite of joy?" "Sadness," replied a student. "And the opposite of depression?" “Elation," said a woman. The professor said to a young man from Texas, "What is the opposite of woe?"
The young man replied, "Sir, I believe that would be giddy-up."
March is a time people feel depressed after long months of winter. People place orders for sunshine due to grey clouds. Some feel low or losing control of life, anxiety, panic. Our thoughts impact our body. We isolate, disconnect from others, which is a trap. We don’t want to feel like this. Yet depression is triggered by trauma; social, mental, emotional, or physical trauma especially experienced young.
Margaret in her forties suffered depression. When she was a child, she got decent grades, was happy, until one soul-scarring day. Miss Garner, her bitter, harsh teacher, when 9 year old Margaret raced in from recess late again, Ms. Garner was furious! Margaret was told to face the class. Ms. Garner ranted, “Margaret has been a bad girl! We have to teach her a lesson. We will force her to see how selfish she is. I want each of you to write something bad about Margaret on the blackboard. May this make her a better person!” Margaret stood frozen as one by one they wrote life-smothering words. “Margaret is stupid! selfish! fat! Margaret is a dummy!” 25 scribblings of “badness” was written on her very soul. When she got home, she crawled into bed, sick, tried to cry pain away, but pain never left her 40 years!
I thought Christians shouldn't be depressed. When I had suicidal thoughts, I called on God and went for help. I found in MY case, depression means there is someone I need to forgive. I may need to forgive myself. If you've ever been on receiving end of abuse, forgiveness isn’t simply saying, "I forgive what they did," and pretending it never happened. A myth about forgiveness is it’s easy. To really forgive from the heart, put the hurt in God’s hands, and let go feelings of revenge and resentment is actually superhuman.
When you bear consequences of someone's hurt, it is hard work! If I borrowed a pencil from you and lost it, you’d easily forgive. But if I drove drunk, hit you, paralyzed you from waist down, your whole life is affected. Real forgiveness is when we refuse to give in to bitterness, and leave justice in God's hands. To the world it is illogical, but it's the prescription God offers to heal hurt.
SONG: I’M FORGIVEN
Forgiveness is not reconciliation. Reconcile is restoring friendship, to check an account against another in accuracy. How do you restore harmony with someone who wronged you for life? Margaret was slumped in a psychologist’s office cringing in shadow of those 25 sentences. Margaret had become what students had written. Her teacher knew “Sticks and stones may break my bones but words will never hurt me” is a lie! What people say DOES matter!
God requires me to forgive the business partner who cheats me; He doesn’t require I stay in business with him; to forgive someone who raped or beat me up, but not go back again to be raped. If they REALLY want the relationship, they repent and stop abusing. If your friend thinks there’s nothing wrong in spreading lies about you, they’ll do it again. Forgiveness depends on me; reconciliation depends on both of us. If one part of the us won't stop abusing the other, you can’t have a relationship, though we forgive.
The human mind is amazing engineering, but it doesn’t just forget hurt. Try not to think about snow; first thing to pop in your mind is snow. We do not deny or forget pain. If I stole $1000, “I repent I will never do it again, please forgive me," do I get to KEEP the $1000? What is my repentance if I keep the money? If I don't return what I stole, repentance is hollow, meaningless. When Zacchaeus repented of stealing, he paid it back. People can be forgiven, yet still go to prison facing consequence of breaking the law. The law demands punishment, restitution though the Victim of the crime may forgive the criminal.
Repentance is necessary to accept forgiveness, but not to grant forgiveness. Forgiveness cuts the emotional rope tying us to the offender. We release them from the debt they owe us, so WE can move on with OUR lives. Letting go of a rattlesnake might help the snake, but it benefits you much more. Don’t let the past undermine us; use forgiveness to move on.
Leo Schreven’s death has showed me, we need to stop stigma and shame about mental illness. He told the story of how his family was invaded at gunpoint by criminals. When the mind becomes ill, it acts out trauma. You wouldn’t say to a Christian, it’s a sin to have a broken leg! It’s not a sin to have an injured mind. Proverbs 18:14, The spirit of a man will sustain him in sickness; but a wounded spirit WHO can bear? Not even the strongest of us!
In the bible, Elijah, Jeremiah, Hezekiah, Job and Hannah suffered severe depression, downcast, troubled, in despair, broken-hearted, suicidal thoughts. Moses, Naomi, Solomon, Nehemiah, Zacharias, John the Baptist in prison had symptoms of depression. David and his men reached Ziklag, they found it destroyed by fire, their wives and children taken captive. David and his men wept aloud until they had NO strength left to weep. Paul had great trauma. “In Macedonia, we had no rest, but were harassed at every turn- conflicts outside, fears within. But God, who comforts the downcast, comforted us by the coming of Titus, and not only by his coming but also by comfort you had given him,” 2Corinthians 7:5-7.
SONG: SOMETIMES HE CALMS THE STORM/ LITTLE FLOWERS
One of England's finest preachers, Charles Spurgeon was plunged into severe depression. A lawyer suffered such deep depression his friends kept all knives and razors out of his reach. That lawyer became President Abraham Lincoln. Ministers who suffer from depression are ashamed to seek help because they live in the public eye, unless we remove stigma from depression. Jonah ran from God. "Throw me into the sea. I know this terrible storm is all MY fault." Then Jonah 4:3, “Now, O Lord, take away my life, for it is better for me to die than to live." God saved prophet Jonah twice from suicidal thoughts. Jesus, in Gethsemane, sweat drops of blood. Does Jesus understand our agony?
We’re taught, “Look right; how we look is everything.” Magazines and TV give this illusion. It's easy to have the world’s mindset. 1Samuel 16:7, But the Lord said to Samuel, "Do not consider his appearance or his height. The Lord does NOT look at the things man looks at." Performance stress also leads to depression. God can see if our acts of service, giving, hospitality, church going, or leadership come from a heart wanting to please HIM or from obligation, duty or fear what people will say. Our spirituality is not based on our standing in church. We can’t add to salvation; we can’t make God love us more than He already does, or less. Our long pulpit prayer doesn’t make us better than one who doesn't pray out loud. Love is NOT where the first to the finish line wins.
Unspoken rules are ones you find out about after you've broken them. Take the unspoken rule "Thou shalt not question the teaching." No one says these rules aloud but you sense the "can't talk" rule. You should be able to ask leaders why they made the decision they did. Submit to each other doesn’t mean agreeing with everything any leader does. We don’t leave our brains at the door to let others think for us.
Lack of balance can cause depression. Regular sleep, eating our veggies, exercise, having someone you can count on, are necessary for everyone. They aren't just good for you, they ease depression. Christians need balance between facts and feeling, between what we read in the bible, and how we personally know God. There’s two extremes. Cold interpretation puts knowledge over a close relationship with God and denies He is active in our day. The other extreme is going by feelings. We must use the Bible as yardstick to measure experiences.
A woman went to the well at noon, because she was isolating from people who judged and shunned her. Jesus went specifically to meet her. He broke Jewish custom since Jews despised the mixed race of Samaritans. He asked her for water which made Him ceremonially unclean by drinking from her jar. This shocked the woman out of her low spirit. Jesus said He could give her living water. He revealed she had been through five husbands and the sixth man wouldn’t commit to her. Jesus was saying, “You looked for love in every place, but I created you and love you with everlasting love that flows forever in eternal life.” All her shame, guilt and fear aside, she ran to tell people, “Come see a Man who told me all I ever did.” Can you imagine THIS from the same woman who feared people judged her past? The Samaritans came; for 2 days Jesus taught them. They declared, “He is indeed Savior of the world.”
SONG: UNDER THE INFLUENCE OF MERCY
Paranoid thinking says the world is out to get you, siege mentality of "us against them." It makes leaving abuse harder. Doctors know someone isn't depressed if they can answer, “Is this something you should put up with, or something you need to walk away from?” Depressed people put up with emotional or spiritual abuse. Experts found 3 factors that produce depression in a church. "We Alone are Right," using scare tactics like hellfire, and trying to keep people in line. Saying we are the only true and right one is spiritual abuse. Find people who know HOW to love and are accepting. Claim God’s Word over yourself every day. “For God has not given me the spirit of fear; but of power, love, and of a sound mind.” God’s Love is endorphins to uplift the spirit.
After decades of depression and anxiety, Margaret took two years till she felt ready to move on. Counselor said, “Describe what you remember they wrote.” It was easy because Margaret remembered every detail for every day of 40 years. When she was done, Margaret cried. Counselor said, “You left out one person.”
“I did not! I have been living with this story 40 years! I know every student by heart.”
“No, Margaret, you forgot Someone. See, He’s sitting in back of the classroom. He’s walking to your teacher. He is erasing every sentence. They are gone! Margaret, they are gone! Now He’s writing new sentences on your board. Do you know Him yet? Look! Margaret is loved, beautiful, gentle, kind, strong, caring, patient, worthwhile. Margaret has great courage.” Jesus has written this same for YOU.
Psalm 27, “Lord, You are my light and my salvation, whom shall I fear? You are the strength of my life. When the wicked, even my enemies came upon me to eat me up, they stumbled and fell. Even if a host of people encamp about me, my heart will not fear: even if war should rise against me, in this I will be confident. I desire that I may dwell in Your house to behold Your beauty. In times of trouble, I know You will hide me in Your pavilion: I know You hear me when I cry; I know of Your tender mercy.” On the cross Jesus paid the price for our healing. We don’t beat ourselves up, we don’t have to hide our feelings, we don’t have to feel bad. We accept God’s love and know Jesus proved He understands the hurting heart! Jesus says, “Hold on, My child, this Earth’s long winter will soon be over.”
SONG: THEN CAME THE MORNING