Cheesiest Holmes Lines

Even in good Holmes adaptations there can be some cheesey dialogue. In the straight-to-DVD Holmes adaptations it can be hard to escape the bad lines.

Either way, there's something specially enjoyable about poorly written lines. Whether it's an awkward simile, an clumsy piece of exposition or an unsubtle hint, they bring a special joy.

It is the DRC's goal to collate a list of as many of these poor lines as possible. And then enjoy them.

Originally we had in mind TV or Film productions, but if you find cheese in books, articles, comics or any other media, feel free to submit that too!

Once we have a sizable list, we'll have some sort of knockout competition or vote to put them all in order of cheesiness.

I've no idea when that will be - maybe in a month, maybe a year. Whatever seems right.

The list can be found HERE and I will add to it as suggestions come in.

To submit your discoveries please email them to me at

Remember to include which adaptation they came from, roughly where (eg "Chapter 3" or "30 minutes in") and the name you'd like the find credited to.

I've also set my Twitter account up so you can Direct Message me even if we aren't following each other. I am @BaronVonBork.

Or you can tweet the line with the hashtag #CheeseyHolmes

If a Holmes makes you cringe, please let me know!