Framing your message

Frame your message for the reader's purpose.
What does your reader need to know and do as the result of your message?

Example:
Request for middle-school teacher to prepare homework for student who has missed school.
The draft is written from the writer's point of view. How does the revised message address the reader's purpose?

Draft

Hello Ms. Socol,

Michael missed most of Wednesday, Thursday, and will likely miss Friday due to illness (looks like the flu--headache, stomach ache, fever, chills, and soreness). I would like to pick up any work that he has missed. We could come by Oakwood on Friday to get any assignments that he could complete over the weekend so that he will be prepared for Monday (hopefully well and ready for school).

Constance

Rewrite for reader purpose.

    1. What is the reader's purpose: Where is it stated? To find the reader's purpose, consider how the information affects him or her. What is the writer asking of the teacher?

    2. Where should this information appear in the message?

    3. How should it be stated?

Revised

Hello Ms. Socol,

I have a favor to ask: Would you collect Michael's homework for us? Michael missed most of Wednesday, Thursday, and will likely miss Friday due to illness. May we pick up any work that he has missed as well as homework for these days? We could come by Oakwood on Friday to get any assignments that he could complete over the weekend so that he will be prepared for Monday (hopefully well and ready for school).

Please let us know if this is something you can do for us.

Constance

Tips for framing your message:

    1. Identify any action you want the reader to take. (The reader's news/purpose.)

    2. Put the news (bottom line) up front.

    3. State desired action as a direct request.

    4. In longer messages, repeat and/or set off requests.

    5. Use design to emphasize the "news."