Last May, after learning that most new managers get no training on key skills, I reached out and interviewed forty experienced people managers to ask them what they wish they had known when they first started managing people.  Over the last year I’ve been taking what I’ve learned from those interviews, and making a series of articles for new managers, or people thinking about becoming a people manager.  This article is the last one in that series, and it’s about resilience in the face of constant change.

When I first started managing people, I had this very naïve view of how it would go.  I was going to build a team of skilled people who all work well together, establish great processes, and then we were just going to execute.  I had worked on teams that felt like that, but never in the position of a manager.

It wasn’t long before reality slapped me in the face.  One of my more competent team members quit – and right after I’d given them a special performance bonus.  My first self-centred reaction was to feel hurt.  Had I done something wrong?  How could they mess up our great team dynamic?  As it turns out, this person’s decision had nothing to do with me.  They loved their job.  But their dream opportunity had opened up at another company, and they went for it.  While I was happy for them (once I got a grip), I was also knocked for a loop.  I had to scramble to find,  interview and hire a replacement, backfill the work gaps and re-establish new team norms.

I was not the only junior manager to feel like these situations were a setback.  Other managers that I interviewed shared similar stories:

“I held onto a belief early on in my management career that I should be able to know and predict all the time [what’s going on with your staff].  Like, if you're a good manager, you know before people decide to leave.  Since people do leave, I took that as a sign that I must not be doing it right.”

Of course, my vision that I could get my team to some kind of ideal state and keep them there was ridiculous.  Things were always changing, and larger teams means more change.  People moved between projects, people went on maternity leave, people had long-term illnesses, mergers brought new people in, there were interpersonal squabbles and office romances and senior execs with bright ideas and people who just wanted to do something different with their lives.

Over time I came to understand that dealing with this constant change was not keeping me from doing my job – it was my job.  Keeping my teams healthy, engaged and productive in the face of the whirlwind, both internal and external, is what management is all about.  Seeing these kinds of change events as setbacks or exceptions rather than the normal flow of things created a lot of unnecessary stress.

Once of my interviewees said this:

“I try to tell people on my team now, especially whenever something happens that's outside of their control, or where they made a poor choice, or there's an interpersonal conflict – I just tell them that for the most part it's all recoverable. You will have another project and you'll grow.  Hopefully you have taken what you learned from the project you didn't think was a success, and you do better next time.

…

When people truly internalize that most things are recoverable, then it can bring a sense of playfulness into the work. Or experimentation. I tried this, here's what I learned from it. I would do it a little differently next time. So it just doesn't feel like it's so harsh. It feels like it's more of a journey.”

Knowing that change is a constant makes it clear why it is so important for leaders and teams to be resilient.  You’re going to get knocked back by circumstances regularly, and you need to be able to get back up again.  Some people think of resilience as a kind of fixed innate personal quality, but I take a much more practical approach.  Resilience is something you can build.  By making investments in yourself and your team when things are going well, you can be prepared when things go south and recover more easily -- and even take advantage of the unexpected to grow.

Here are some questions to ask yourself:

• Is your team always swamped with critical work?  How might you build some slack into the schedule to create the capacity to respond to change?

• Are you trying to foster a learning culture and psychological safety on your teams?

• Is there any one person on the team who is mission-critical?  If so, can you duplicate their key skills and knowledge through co-working, mentoring, or hiring?  (This includes YOU – can your team operate without you for a while?  If not, how might you prepare them to do so?  See also this article on micromanagment.)

• Have you established regular rituals or processes for your team to discuss situations and mistakes, learn from them, and respond by changing their work processes?  (e.g. regular retrospectives)

• What are you doing to create and sustain a pool of potential talent that can come into the team when other people leave?  (e.g. with an internship program, by attending hiring events, or just staying in casual touch with promising people you find and meet over time)

• How might you streamline your hiring and onboarding processes to keep gaps as short as possible?

• What rituals might you establish to help welcome new team members, make them feel they belong, and (when the time comes) say goodbye?

• Are you doing succession planning for everyone on your team so you are ready if something happens?

• How do you help your team members prepare for the next steps in their careers, and grow new talent for the company ready to be promoted when a senior position opens?

• Do you have work peers that you can count on for advice or a space to vent when needed?

• Do you have mentors to help you grow your own capability and widen your perspective?

• Have you found effective ways to minimize your own stress?  (Exercise, mindfulness practices, improved diet, improved sleep hygiene, are all things that help some people.)

These are not the only ways to build resilience, of course.  It’s a great topic to bring up at your team and peer retrospectives to see what else you might do that will work for your particular team.

I’d like once again to thank the forty experienced people managers who volunteered their time to share their thoughts and experiences so that I could create these free resources for new managers.

If you are a new people manager – or thinking of becoming one – I hope this series of articles has been of some use to you on your journey, and I wish you the best luck and success.  As a manager, your actions will have a significant impact on the well-being of your staff, whether you like it or not.  Choose well.

More from John  (or follow his RSS Feed )

Management Misconceptions - Everything television told you about being a manager is wrong

Psychological Safety Gaps - How leaders are getting it wrong

Toxic Legacy - Why losing your toxic employees is only the first step

Micromanagement and Psychological Safety - How a toxic management style impacts team health

The Authentic Team - The problem with bringing your whole self to work

Five Feedback Fails - When your feedback style needs feedback