Safety

These writings are a sample of the Personal Safety Questions from the Nar-Anon Fourth Step Inventory Workbook ©

Sometimes we are so acclimated to a situation that we do not realize our lives have become unmanageable. Using this checklist can raise awareness. This is a personal worksheet. There are no right or wrong answers.

It may be helpful to share what we find with a trusted person such as a sponsor, fellow member, therapist, or other professional. We share only what we are ready to share.

• Verbal - Did I feel intimidated by yelling or angry voices?

• Physical - Has anyone hit me?

• Weapon - Has a weapon been displayed to intimidate me?

• Verbal - Have I or my loved one verbally threatened to leave?

• Physical - Have I started planning in case I need to leave?

• Weapon - Have I applied for a restraining or protective order?

• Verbal - Did I feel manipulated by my loved one's words?

• Physical - Was I pressured or manipulated to do something against my will?

• Weapon - Was I manipulated by threats with a weapon?

© Copyright Nar-Anon Family Groups Headquarters, Inc.

This is an extract from the Beware page in the Nar-Anon Progress Not Perfection Journal ©

Regarding Violence: It is our responsibility to keep ourselves and our children physically and legally safe.

Physically Safe: Although we often hear it said in the program to not make any decisions until you have been in the program for at least six months, this does not apply if a situation is abusive or violent.

Legally Safe: Covering up drug activity of others... can have serious legal consequences for ourselves and our custody of our minor children.

© Copyright Nar-Anon Family Groups Headquarters, Inc.

This is an extract from the Boundaries and Consequences pamphlet ©

Boundaries on physical, verbal, or mental abuse are not negotiable. We deserve to be treated with respect and dignity. We honor ourselves by not allowing others to mistreat us. Boundaries are helpful in all our relationships.

It is essential we communicate our boundaries and their consequences calmly and clearly. A healthy boundary is set without anger or resentment and is always communicated to others who may be affected by our decisions. Discussing our boundaries with them may help create unity. This may make it easier to set a boundary with confidence, knowing we will not be alone if conflicts arise. If possible, communication should happen when the addict is in a receptive frame of mind and not under the influence of drugs.

Have I clearly stated the consequences for overstepping my boundary? Non-fulfillment of a stated consequence is usually viewed by the addict as a sign of weakness and a signal to continue breaking the boundary. Applying the Twelve Steps of Nar-Anon and setting boundaries is likely to result in an improvement to our lives and relationships

© Copyright Nar-Anon Family Groups Headquarters, Inc.

These writings are a sample of the Do's and Don'ts section in An Open Letter to My Family pamphlet ©

Do: Note the effect the addict has on each member of the family.

Don’t: Nag, argue, lecture or recall past mistakes.

Don’t: Overlook the growth opportunities of a crisis.

Don’t: Underestimate the importance of release with love.

© Copyright Nar-Anon Family Groups Headquarters, Inc.

See the Personal Safety checklist in the 4th Step Workbook - A collection of Inventories

See the Beware page in the introduction to the Progress not Perfection Journal

Read the Boundaries and Consequences pamphlet and read it again

See the Do's and Don'ts section in the An Open Letter to My Family pamphlet

Check the online version of the 20 Questions - Is Nar-Anon for Me?