Loneliness

Contents

Overview

Loneliness is a subjective, unwelcome feeling of lack or loss of companionship. It happens when we have a mismatch between the quantity and quality of social relationships that we have, and those that we want. It can affect anyone at any point in their life, whether they are physically alone or with others. Loneliness is not just physical isolation. It can also be emotional, where one does not feel understood or appreciated despite being with others.

Psychology of Loneliness

Social Needs


Humans are by design social creatures who require connection and interaction to live well in society. When these needs are not met, it can lead to feelings of loneliness. According to Maslow's Hierarchy of Needs, belongingness is an essential step in reaching everything you are capable of being.


Perceived Isolation


Contrary to actual isolation, perceived isolation is when you feel disconnected despite having only a few social contacts. This mismatch between desired and actual social interaction can contribute significantly to feelings of loneliness.

Coping Strategies

Cultivating Social Skills


One way to address loneliness is to enhance your social skills. Communication is key to forming and maintaining relationships. 


By improving the ability to express thoughts and emotions, and to listen and respond to others, you can create deeper and more meaningful connections with those around you.


Mindfulness and Acceptance


Practicing mindfulness means staying present and fully engaging with the current moment. It allows for the acceptance of your lonely feelings without judgment, creating a space to understand and address the underlying issues.


Acknowledging your feelings of loneliness without self-criticism can pave the way for emotional healing. It's about accepting that loneliness is a natural human emotion that can be managed and alleviated.

Building Meaningful Connections

Seeking Shared Interests


One of the most effective ways to connect with others is through shared interests or activities. Joining clubs, groups, or online forums where you can meet like-minded people provides the basis for building meaningful relationships.


Volunteering and Altruism


Engaging in volunteer work can create a sense of purpose and contribute to your sense of belonging. Altruistic actions can facilitate connections with others and reduce feelings of isolation.

Loneliness in the Digital Age

Social Media: A Double-Edged Sword


While social media can provide a platform for staying connected, it can also contribute to feelings of inadequacy and isolation when it replaces authentic, face-to-face interactions. It's important to find a healthy balance and use social media to enhance, not replace, real-world socialising.

Technology as a Tool for Connection

Online Communities


Online communities can offer spaces for those who share common interests to convene and converse. They can act as a bridge to forming friendships that may also exist offline.


Video Calls and Virtual Meetings


In situations where physical presence is not possible, video calls and virtual meetings can help maintain relationships. These tools allow for visual and verbal

communication, which can deepen personal connections.

Self-Care and Reflection

Self-Compassion and Growth


Self-compassion involves treating yourself with the same kindness you would offer a friend. It encourages personal growth and resilience, and adjusting self-talk from negative to positive can have profound effects on your emotional well-being.

Reflecting on Personal Desires


Taking time to reflect upon what one truly seeks in relationships is crucial. This self-reflection can influence social pursuits and relationship investments, ensuring they align with personal values and desires.