3 Tools Your Gifted Child Can Use to Manage Stress

by: Pamela M. Peters

1. Physiological Sigh

This respiratory technique is considered the fastest form to control stress. The logic behind it is simple: When people exhale for more time and more vigorously than they inhale (twice the amount is the ideal rate), their bodies will lower their stress, Ask children to:

• Inhale twice the length of time than they exhale. They may choose how long it takes since the rate 1:2 is constant.  For example, one child may breathe in for 2 seconds and breathe out for 4 seconds, Another may prefer to breathe in for 3 seconds and breathe out for 6 seconds.

• Exhale more strongly than inhale, This simply means that children should inhale lightly and exhale vigorously,

• Focus on expanding their bellies (rather than their chests) when they breathe, using diaphragmatic breathing

• Practice it for just a few minutes until they master it

• Apply the physiological sigh in situations when children feel they are tense in their everyday lives (when they are playing video games, studying, etc.).  Normally, one to three physiological sighs will be enough.

After at-home practice, transfer this respiratory pattern to exams and other stressful school situations.

2. Thought Control in Four Steps

Some children get anxious and have negative thoughts when in situations like taking an exam or making an oral presentation. In these scenarios, the main goal is to stop the "bad" thoughts so that they might focus on the tasks they want to, without freezing, panicking, or losing concentration.

This quick 4-step approach may help children reduce anxiety and cope with stress at school:

• First, ask your children to identify and stop any negative thoughts (for instance, stop thinking of grades or people's judgment).

• Next, tell them to use the physiological sigh twice or three times (the type of respiration described previously).

• Third, direct your children to think about something that makes them relaxed, or look at something that makes them tranquil, which is not related to the negative thought (for example, a tranquil place they like to visit).

• Finally, direct them to get back to the task they were doing before starting the thought-control exercise (for example, keep working on a difficult homework assignment).

Hint: Be sure to help your child practice this technique at home before transferring it to school situations that involve their performance (e.g., tests and exams).

3. Schultz Autogenic Training

This classic relaxation tool takes 10 minutes per session. Children can do this exercise independently once they learn the steps.

• Before starting, keep external stimuli to a minimum.  Children should wear comfortable clothing.

• Have the children sit or lie comfortably. For example, they can sit in an armchair with their head, back, and extremities supported. They may lie down with their head supported, and legs seven inches apart (toes pointed outward). Their arms should be positioned at their sides (without touching their body).

• Direct the children to scan their bodies with their minds to ensure their position is tension-free.

• Direct the children to close their eyes.

• Tell the children to take a few slow, deep, and relaxing breaths, sending mental instructions for relaxation to the different parts of their bodies, from feet to head.

• Direct the children to inhale and focus the respiration on their feet. They should imagine they are sending the air to their feet and that their feet are getting warmer.

• Ask them to take a deep breath. Once they breathe out, tell them to send a mental command to their feet to relax, using their "mind's voice."

• After the children do the last two steps with their feet, ask them to repeat both steps with their legs, torso, arms, hands, shoulders, neck, and head.

• When students finish mentally relaxing their whole bodies, ask them to open their eyes.

Guide the children through this exercise with a low-volume, calm voice.