Housing and Utilities

Temporary or Emergency Housing

You need an address to do almost anything, from applying for jobs to getting needed documents, and, of course, for shelter. So if you are moving, finding a place to stay is a priority. Often it is easier to find temporary housing—a place where you can stay for a while until you settle basic questions like where you will work or study and how much money you have to live on.

If you can plan ahead, try to arrange a place to stay before you leave. If you

you may not be able to plan ahead where you will stay.

Here are some options for temporary housing.

Staying with Family or Friends

A friend or family member who can take you in for even a night or two is a major resource. Family and friends may understand more than you realize about what happened to you and — even though harsh words might have been exchanged between you — may be glad to help now that you have left the group.

Ex-members have found that even families who explicitly cut them off would have been ready to help had they known of the need. In that situation, try a phone call. You might say something like this:

“Hi, [name of person]. This is [your name]. I want you to know that I’ve left [or “I’m planning to leave”] [name of the group]. I need a place to stay; and I wondered if, despite everything, you could take me in for a couple of nights?”

Keep to the point and try to get your news out immediately (before your family member has a chance to hang up). Explanations and apologies can wait—preferably until you see her in person, but certainly until you know what kind of reception you will get.

If you are with friends or family members, you will have a breathing space to think about the next steps. It’s important to discuss with your hosts just how long you might need to stay, and whether that length of stay is OK with them. You might want to prepare for this conversation by asking yourself:

It’s important to be as realistic as you can. But “realistic” doesn’t mean “pessimistic.” It means picking the most likely possibility, not the best or worst. For example, if the Social Security office tells you that your card will come in two to six weeks, but these days it usually takes four weeks, figure that you will get your card in four to six weeks.

Your hosts will want to be supportive. Encourage them to be realistic, too. Sleeping on the sofa for a few nights is not the same as moving in for three months. Everybody needs to think and talk about it.

You may be better off if you

Fitting in. It’s a good idea to talk things over with your hosts and find out what will make your stay as easy as possible for all of you. For instance,

You probably won’t cover all the issues in one conversation; but if you set the tone of openness and honesty right at the start, it will be easier to raise issues later during your stay.

Chores. In the group, you may have spent your entire day doing menial household duties—cleaning, cooking, laundry—for others. Or, as a former member of an elite segment of the group, you may be accustomed to having others do all these chores. In mainstream society, everyone is expected to pitch in. This makes the chores less dreary all round and also reflects the mainstream view that such chores are not demeaning. No matter how long or short your stay, it is important to assist your hosts with a reasonable share of routine tasks like

What is a reasonable share of household chores? Each household has its own habits and ways of doing things. You might start by noticing what these are.

You can fit yourself into this pattern by offering to help, and by paying attention to responses to your offers. This doesn’t mean that you should take on everything you can possibly do. You can look for

You may notice chores that go undone, such as cleaning the garage or washing the car, because no one else has the time to do them. (It’s important, in this case, to check first. If the family members don’t care about this particular task, they may not appreciate your doing it.) Other considerations are the amount of time and effort you put into this activity.

Men may not do housework where you came from; but in mainstream America, most do, especially house guests. Men do traditional chores such as

But they also

Your hosts will welcome your assistance.

Sharing the costs. You can show that you’re mindful of the costs of the hospitality:

Emergency Shelters

Emergency shelters are free sleeping places that local governments or private charities provide. Checking into a “homeless” shelter may seem demeaning, or even frightening, but it’s usually preferable to sleeping on the street. Although some shelters are better run than others, many offer support services to help you get back on your feet in addition to a place to sleep and shower. Some shelters take all comers; others are more selective and provide services only to specific groups, such as women with children.

Most shelters offer

Some shelters offer breakfast or other meals. Those that do not can tell you where to find soup kitchens that provide meals for homeless people.

There are different kinds of shelters:

To find shelters in your area, google “Emergency shelter,” plus the name of your city or county.

The shelter may be far from comfortable. But you will have a place to sleep and an address you can use to get a photo ID (you will need to get a form from the shelter staff), and to apply for a job or other assistance, such as food stamps or transitional housing.

Domestic Violence Shelters

If you are a victim of domestic violence, you are eligible for a shelter especially designed to assist you.

To find a domestic violence shelter in your area, google “domestic violence shelter,” plus your state or city. You will find a contact number, but not an address.  The National Domestic Violence Hotline is here to help you navigate.  The number is (800) 799-SAFE.

Transitional Housing

Transitional housing is longer-term, low- or no-cost temporary housing, where you can stay for several months until you are able to afford your own place. Support staff at an emergency shelter or a day program can help you find transitional housing. Some transitional housing programs will accept people who have been staying with family or friends. Others will not.

In a transitional housing program:

Religious organizations sponsor or support many transitional housing programs. A few housing programs have religious restrictions or requirements, such as participating in a prayer service. Most don’t, but you may want to ask about those things before you enter a program.

Hostels

Hostels are very inexpensive, but usually safe and clean overnight accommodations intended primarily for travelers.

Hotels and Motels

If you have a job, you may be able to go directly to a motel or hotel. Motels and hotels range in quality from out-of-sight luxurious and expensive to suspiciously cheap and possibly dangerous.

Some offer weekly or monthly rates, usually a better deal than daily rates. Many offer basic kitchen facilities, such as refrigerator, microwave oven, and cooktop burners, along with a few dishes and pots.

When choosing a hotel or motel, you will need to make some quick decisions about the quality and safety of the place. Here are a few points to keep in mind:

Most hotels and motels expect you to pay by credit or debit card. If you don’t have either of those, be prepared to pay cash in advance.  Most hotels and motels also expect for you to have government issued identification. 

Rental Basics For clear and useful information about renting a house or apartment, check out the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development web site, which links to information ranging from whether or not you are eligible for government-assisted housing, to the laws in your state about tenants’ rights and responsibilities, to “Tips every tenant should know.”

Following are some important things to think about when you are looking for housing.

Location of housing

You must be able to get from your home to your job, school, or other necessary place.

Safety

How safe is the neighborhood? Are the streets clean and well lit? Are there people walking about in the neighborhood?  Do people from your “old life,” who might make it harder to build a new life, live in the neighborhood?

Price

A rough rule is that you should not pay more than one-third of your monthly income for housing.

Under no circumstances should you pay so much for rent that you cannot afford to get to and from work.

Keep in mind that prices tend to go up. Try to avoid paying the utmost you can afford (unless you have good reason to think that next year you will be earning more), so you will have the resources to pay for higher rent or utility bills as prices rise.

See Money and Budgeting for a fuller discussion about managing your income and expenses.

Finding a Place

Once you have decided how much you can afford, and have identified neighborhoods you might live in, you can search online, in print, and on foot.

A combination of these methods will give you the best idea about where you want to live and whether or not you can afford it.

Leases and Rental Agreements

In addition to the price, you need to have clear, written information about other important terms and conditions of your rental.

Your responsibilities

The owner or agent will expect you to provide

Rent is usually due promptly on the date agreed to, and is usually paid in advance. You will not receive a bill, and it is your responsibility to remember to pay on time.

A basic agreement should include

In addition, the agreement may include miscellaneous items, such as rules about

If you are sharing with a friend or renting one room in a small apartment, you may feel uncomfortable about the formality of asking for all this in writing. At the least,

Cautions and precautions

You are entitled to ask questions and get answers before you sign. Be suspicious of anyone who tries to make you feel stupid or ignorant for asking a question, or tries to rush you into signing. Anyone

needs to explain this last-minute change very clearly—and you need to think very carefully about whether you want to make a deal with this person at all.

Before you sign anything, read the whole document carefully.

Keep copies of every document related to your housing, from the rental agreement to the receipts for your deposit and rental payments.

Types of Housing

Depending on your income, work obligations, and personal preferences, you may find several different types of housing in the area you are interested in.

Rooms and Shared Housing

The cheapest housing available is usually a rented room.

Renting a furnished room or sharing a house or apartment meets the basic need for an address and a place to sleep. If you are not ready to make a long-term decision about where to live, you can probably find a month-to-month rental. And you will need either little or no furniture. The disadvantages are

Apartments and Houses

A house or apartment will have its own kitchen and bathroom, more privacy, and usually, more space.

If you move to an apartment or house, you will probably need to furnish it. This can be a big demand on your time, money, and energy. There are some ideas for setting up a household inexpensively at Finding Essential Furniture and Equipment.

Housing Assistance

Housing can be quite expensive in some areas. Even though you have a job, you may find that housing in your area costs more than you can afford. This section describes some ways of getting assistance with housing costs

Rent for this type of housing is based on your ability to pay.

The federal housing authority is the U.S. Department of Housing and Urban Development. You usually must go to the local public housing authority to start the process. You can find your local public housing office online by selecting the state in which you live.

Public Housing

Public housing was established to provide decent and safe rental housing for eligible low-income families, the elderly, and persons with disabilities. Your local housing authority will determine whether you are eligible and how many rooms you need according to state or local regulations. The application process is lengthy, and there is usually a waiting list—sometimes years—once you are accepted.

HUD sets income limits for eligibility that vary from region to region, based on the median income in the county or metropolitan area where you live. The median income is the number in the middle of the range of incomes, meaning that an equal number of people earn both more and less. For example,

If there are 100 people in the area,

and 50 of them earn more than $40,000 a year,

while 50 of them earn less than $40,000 per year

the median income for that area is $40,000.

If your income is 80% of the median, you are in the “lower income” bracket.

If your income is 50%—that is, half—of the median, HUD considers your income to be “very low.”

When you apply for public housing, you will probably be asked for this information:

Be prepared to show documents—birth certificates, tax returns, and so on, that support your statements. You can find more information about public housing here.

Housing Choice Vouchers (Section 8 Housing)

Under this program, you apply through your local public housing authority for a certificate of eligibility, and then you find your own housing on the private market. Any landlord who meets the requirements may rent to you. The government will pay the landlord a share of the rent directly, and you pay the rest.

The income requirements for vouchers are much like those for public housing, and the application process is also similar. So is the waiting list, although it is more sensitive to market forces than public housing. For instance,

You can get more information about Section 8 housing here.

Privately Owned Subsidized Housing

The government also gives direct subsidies to apartment owners who then lower the rents they charge to low-income families and individuals, persons with disabilities, and senior citizens. Eligibility for this housing also depends on having a low enough income.

The process is a little different than other forms of subsidized housing. Go to this Web site, plug in the state where you wish to apply, and with a couple of clicks you will have a list of apartment owners who participate in this program.

Utilities

If you rent, costs of some or all of the basic utilities may be included in the rental price. You will need to budget for utilities that are not included.

Water, Electricity, Gas, Heating, and Air Conditioning

Water, electricity, and gas are basic services that make your home livable and comfortable. Depending on what part of the country you live in, heating and air conditioning may be important.

If you are renting an apartment,

If you are renting a house, you will probably be responsible for all these utilities.

Costs of water, electricity, and gas depend on how much you use.

In addition to the basics, telephone service, Internet access, and cable or satellite TV are considered utilities.

Telephone

Phone charges are not generally covered in rental payments. Since people are expected to be reachable by phone, you will have to consider how to connect to telephone service. If you have a computer and want to access the Internet from home, you will also want to arrange for Internet service. There are many options for both telephone and Internet service, and a wide range of prices. Depending on your needs, you can choose from among the following:

Internet Access

Internet access is available in multiple ways:

In general, you pay more for higher Internet connection speeds. For more information about Internet service providers, you can look here.

Television

In urban areas, you can use an inexpensive antenna to get broadcast TV free over the airwaves from major networks: ABC, CBS, NBC, Fox, and public television stations. In rural areas, or to get a multitude of other television channels, you must subscribe to a provider for a monthly fee.

The cost of these services varies, and the different companies offer different packages, ranging from “basic” to total. There may also be a charge for installing the service, and there is usually a time commitment, ranging from three months to a year or more.

If you sign up for a service with an unusually good deal, remember to check all the fine print (even if you need a magnifying glass to do so). There may be an unpleasant surprise a few months down the line in the form of reduced services and/or increased costs.

Some landlords pay cable or satellite TV costs. Usually, these landlords live in the building and are paying for their own TV; as a result, they incur small, if any, additional costs for additional outlets in the same building.

Finding Essential Furniture and Equipment

A start-up collection of essential furniture and equipment is a one-time cost that you need to include in your beginning housing budget. Costs will vary, depending on where you live and how many people are in your household. Here are some ideas about the basic furniture and equipment you might need, and some suggestions about how to start your new household inexpensively.

What You Might Need

That’s it. Chests of drawers, a desk, additional lamps (provided there are some built-in fixtures), TVs, and microwaves are nice, but they can wait a bit. As your resources of time, energy, and money increase, you can add rugs, sofas, and other amenities.

Where to Get Things

Shelving and storage. Boxes turned on their sides are good for storing clothing and linens. Supermarkets open hundreds of cardboard cartons every day.

You can also buy durable plastic storage boxes in all shapes and sizes. “Milk crates”— also turned on their sides—may serve as bookcases, or for shelving other heavy items like pots and pans.

A slightly more costly shelving option is to purchase bricks and boards from a local lumber store. You can choose from a variety of lengths of board and use bricks to create shelves of varying heights.

Furniture can be extremely expensive, but there are ways to spend less:

It’s very easy to misrepresent the size or condition of furniture over the phone or the Internet. Be sure you see any used furniture or equipment before you purchase it.

You may have to arrange for delivery of used furniture. Inquire about anything large before you buy it. You may have a truck or van (or friends with a truck or van who can help you). If not, you can check with the seller, who may know of someone who will deliver for a fee.

Equipment. It’s preferable to buy equipment new or from a reputable thrift store, unless you can get hand-me-downs from friends and family members.

For your kitchen, to get started you’ll need

Inexpensive pots, pans, and other kitchen equipment are available at most supermarkets. You also can find inexpensive sets of dishes and eating tools at local department or variety stores.

Often, family members can spare a few towels or sheets. Unless you know where they come from, it’s advisable to buy new linens—sheets, pillowcases, towels, and blankets—since some pests may survive laundering. You can find inexpensive linen in department stores, and, more rarely, through online auction or bargain sites.