HOW TO HELP A FRIEND

FIND THE WORDS

Before starting a conversation with someone you are concerned about, be prepared. Have a list of crisis resources on hand. Practice what you will say and plan the conversation for a time when you won't be in a hurry and can spend time with the person. Not sure where to start? Try one of these opening lines to make starting the conversation easier.

• "Seems like something's up. Do you wanna talk about what's going on?"

• "I've noticed you've been down lately. What's going on?"

• "Hey, we haven't talked in awhile. How are you?"

• "Seems like you haven't been yourself lately. What's up?"

• "Have you been thinking about ending your life?"

Mention the signs that prompted you to ask about suicide. This makes it clear that you are not asking "out of the blue". Talking about suicide does NOT put the idea in someone's head and usually they are relieved. Listen to their feelings. Make sure they know how important they are to you. Don't promise secrecy. The person may say they don't want you to tell anyone that they are suicidal. Say this instead:

• "I care about you too much to keep a secret like this. You need help and I am here to help you get it."

You may be concerned that they will be upset with you, but when someone's life is at risk, it is more important to ensure their safety.