Letter 010 - 1945 - End of War - Michael Sadler

20^th May, 2009

Dear Jeremy,

Life at Rhodes University was good. I enjoyed the learning and the social activities. There were open lectures on Science and Literature which I attended. I enjoyed visiting the Music Department which was in a little old historic house where a young lecturer played records and talked about the composers and the music. I also sang in a small choir for a time.

We met frequently in each other’s rooms for coffee parties with much chatter and gossip to entertain ourselves. One vacation I learn't to play bridge.

It was 1945 and we listened to the radio in the Common Room as the British and American Armies advanced across Europe culminating in the eventual defeat of Mussolini and the Italian Army and Hitler and the German Army.There were great celebrations when peace was finally declared.

Like all good Anglicans I attended a Thanksgiving Service in the Cathedral. I did not enjoy the triumphal sermon given by the Bishop but thought humbly that now a great responsibility was ours to keep the peace and act fairly towards the vanquished and so prevent a repetition of the results of the First World War. I believed much of which had been instrumental in causing Germany to rise again with such hatred were the terms of the peace agreement.

Life at Rhodes changed dramatically as returned soldiers either resumed their studies or signed up for courses. We were very busy in the library with the influx of so many new students.

Kitty Paterson, one of the student librarians was all excited as her cousin, Ian, was coming to visit her with a friend. We leaned out of the window and watched her leap into his arms. I looked at his friend standing by and thought ‘Why can’t I meet someone nice like that?’ but Kitty had taken another friend, Pam Galpin, down to meet him and they became friends for a while. I learned later that was Michael Sadler.

Though I knew his name I did not get to know Michael until June 1946 when he needed help finding books in the library. I said that I had heard about him and accused him of having been at Rhodes before but he assured me had not. Then I remembered having heard his name that first day at Rhodes while having tea with Mary Paterson.

We got talking, as people do, and he invited me to go to Kaif (the student café) with him when the library closed. After that, somehow, whenever I was on duty, Michael was there to see me home or take me to Kaif – it was Milo we drank in those days. It was not long before we were going to the cinema together or having a mixed grill at Campbells in town.

I invited him to a Student Christian Association camp at Stone’s Hill, and it was here that he showed me that he liked me by squeezing my hand and whispering in my ear. Perhaps it was the romance of the forest around the the camp that did it.

Whenever Michael came to see me he used to throw stones on my window on the third floor or whistle ‘The Whistler and his Dog’ as he always had a little puppy he had adopted peeping out the top of his army jacket. He was not supposed to do any of this but sedately knock at the front door and ask an Inkette to fetch me – but he continued to do it.

Looking back it must have been a whirlwind romance as one evening returning from the cinema I was taken aback when Michael asked me to marry him. I was 19 going on 20 and had planned to be a career woman and talked about platonic friendships to all the boys I met. I did not mean to upset him but replied I would have to think about it. It was important to me that he would get on with my family so I invited him home one weekend. Needless to say Michael got on very well with my parents and my brothers, Gerald and Bazil. So, the next time he asked me, I said ‘Yes’. We were officially engaged during the Christmas holidays when he bought me an opal ring which cost £10. I said I did not want a diamond as I knew he could not afford it and anyway the Opal is my birthstone and I was not a very conventional person.

I remember one very happy day when my Father lent us his car and we spent the day at the Gulu River walking on the beach and swimming in the sea. We were deliriously happy and very much in love.

I do not have to tell you what I loved about Michael you all know his fine qualities of caring, gentleness, compassion, integrity and love was the eternal theme of his life.

And I did admire his clear-cut profile…so handsome.

As Michael's study grant had all been spent he applied for a post in Basutoland and was appointed to Mohaleshoek as a Revenue Officer. He came down several times to Rhodes to visit me. On one occasion was my 21^st birthday he took me to a hotel for a celebratory dinner. He gave me a gold coloured dressing table set. My Mother gave me a leather dressing case and my Father sent me a silver 21 brooch which has been handed to each of you on your 21st birthdays.

We were married on 3^rd January, 1948 – you all know how that date was arrived at - how I was imprisoned on a farm gate until I named the day.

I have not found this letter easy to write as you know how difficult I find it to express my personal feelings, unlike your father, but I did it…..

Love you, Mum

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