Audition 2026 Monologues

Audition Monologues – SummerSing 2026

*Choose one of the following monologues to learn and ALSO do the “Surfer Dude” line at the end.

The Dangers of Disneyland

I would like to take a moment to talk to all of you about the dangers of taking your parents to Disneyland. 

First off, we are all here with a big group, and who wants to be discovered by a classmate when your mom is wearing Mickey Ears, and asking your little brother how to write a text message…  then of course, there is your dad’s fascination with roller coasters. This could go one of 2 ways, either really fun if he likes all the same rides you do… or if your dad is like mine, then you should avoid them altogether.  My dad made me wait in line for the highest… the fastest, and most exciting ride at Disney… Space Mountain… the line was forever, then we climb into a car that zips off… I started to question my dad about the 4 corndogs he had wolfed down while waiting in line… then it happened… thank goodness Space Mountain is in the dark so no one knew who did it. 

If you go… I suggest sitting in the front!

I’m Not My Brother; I'm Me

My brother, Mark, is three years older than I am. He tends to be on the rowdy side and got into trouble for stealing another school's mascot and trying to overthrow the student council. It isn't easy to follow a guy like that. People expect me to be like him, whether I am or not. On my first day in Mr. Swenson's chemistry class, he took me aside after class and informed me that he would absolutely not tolerate any experiments with the Bunsen burners other than those which were class assignments. He made it quite clear that if he caught me so much as looking at a Bunsen burner, I could expect immediate detention and would spend it scraping gum off the bottoms of the tables in the library.

I could only blink and nod at him. At that point, I didn't even know what a Bunsen burner was and I certainly didn't know that Mark had once set off a series of minor explosions which resulted in the fire department sending two trucks to school and Mr. Swenson being reprimanded by the principal

Everyone speak in your best “Surfer Dude” voice:

“Banzai, beach buddies!  We’re on our way to Pharoah’s Point and are in need of sustenance.

Ya got any?  Gnarly!”