Knots burger pub

Knots Burger Bar

So there I was, minding my own business, scrolling through the local news, when I stumbled upon a nugget of delicious destiny: Knots Burger Bar was donating $1 from every Deluxe burger sold to local food assistance programs all November long. Cue the dramatic gasp. I’d been meaning to try this place anyway, so off I went—because who can resist a good burger for a good cause? Naturally, I ordered the Deluxe. I had to. How could I… knot? (Yes, I went there.)

Before we go any further, let’s clear something up: Knots is a dive bar. But not the “uh-oh, should I sit on this?” kind. No, this is the warm, quirky, lovable kind of dive where you instantly know you’re about to have a memorable time—and probably some memorable food.

Appearance – 3 pts

At first glance, the burger looked a little “meh.” But appearances, my friends, are big, juicy liars. The moment I took a bite, all doubts evaporated like steam off a hot grill.

Bun – 6 pts

A simple white bread bun that held strong all the way to the final chomp. No sog, no collapse. A dependable carb companion.

Meat – 27 pts

Oh. The. Meat.
This was a spiritual experience. A divine char on the outside, juicy bliss on the inside, and flavor for days. I saw the burger heavens open and they were pleased.

Cheese – 13 pts

A humble melt of American cheese that nearly stole the entire show. It whispered its presence in every single bite, like a cheesy guardian angel.

Veggies – 10 pts

Lettuce, tomato, grilled onions, pickles—the whole garden party.

• Lettuce? Snappy and proud.

• Tomato? Present but shy.

• Grilled onions? Blink and you miss ’em.

• Pickles? Barely a cameo.

Dressing – 8 pts

Classic ketchup and mayo working together to give the bun just the right amount of slip ’n slide. A saucy little adventure.

Messiness – 4 pts

Every bite decorated my face with a portrait of burger bliss—juices, sauces, the whole glorious mess. No regrets.

Burgerness – 9 pts

Whatever mystical quality makes a burger a burger, this one had it. Charred, juicy, simple, heartfelt. A hamburger made with love and maybe a little magic.

Final Score: 80 Patty Points

Knots Burger Bar proves a beautiful truth: sometimes, you’ve gotta wander into a dive to find burger paradise. And this place? Absolutely worth untangling your day for. You won’t be disappointed.