The unfeeling, uncaring steel neath my hand
Warms ever so slightly because
I've poured out the warmth of my life while I stand
Remembering who I once was.
I wish that my handprint of warmth may remain
To be there for those passing by,
This symbol of hope could be just what sustains
Their will to continue the fight.
So please little handprint burn warm and burn bright,
Alone on this handrail of steel.
Be there for the person who needs you tonight
And give them the love that I feel.
(Oct. 22, 2025)
Do you ever see the beauty in the drear?
Searching for a hope amongst the fear?
Analyze your face within the mirror
To find the joy?
Are you one who always looks for deeper meaning?
Thinking thoughts all dusty that require cleaning?
Forces all around are always intervening
In your daily life?
Thinkers, thunkers,
Drinkers, drunkards,
All our days are swiftly numbered.
Have you ever walked a road that’s never traveled?
Spent your time locked in the corner, safe and castled?
Taken story after story and unraveled
The parts like you?
Are the cracks along the wall a map for learning?
Staring off into the woods, heart full of yearning?
Find yourself upon the throne, your stomach churning
With anxious thoughts?
Thinkers, thunkers,
Drinkers, drunkards,
All our days are swiftly numbered.
Fallen leaves and centipedes and breezy, freshened air,
Sprouting weeds among the eaves, a bike that needs repair,
Robins sing while on the wing with cardinals’ swift reply—
See the beauty in the drear before at last you die.
(Feb. 16, 2026)
Day 0
Cowboy church and orange slices,
Fluctuating fueling prices.
Conversations half a dream,
Scuff-ed glasses blocking sunbeams.
Speedily we roll along while
Calling out our favorite songs.
Down 55 we make our trail
To start our NOLA music tale.
Day 1
Lying in this comfy bed,
New music spinning in my head.
It’s 3am I cannot sleep—
This jazz infection runs too deep.
The wail of saxes while around
Me dance some Jews who pound the ground
And whirl and lift up in the air
Whoever ends up in the chair.
A whiff of smoke and off we go
To dance and prance at a new show.
The drinks are never flowing free,
So sneak I in a drop for me.
Then soft the night, it gently closes
Another drink I now proposes
To knock me back and then act as
My antidote to restless jazz.
Day 2
Rubbing, boomy rumble of the wheels up through my feet,
The lights go off at random as we groan along the street,
The murmur of the tourists and the glares of residents,
And a sign that says, “Fuck ICE” and also “Fuck the president,”
A dribble-drop of whiskey feels real risky in this crowd
but the sneaky sipping slips unnoticed for it’s too damn loud.
The sharp staccato rapping of the windows slamming shut,
And the slidey wooden seat is grinding painful on my butt—
But the trip was fully worth it for the meal and drinks and fun,
And the day has only started and the night is still to come.
Day 3
Viper bite in dwindling light,
‘Talian night; it feels alright.
Testing buttons,
Big green hat,
Muffulettas,
Saw a cat.
Too much rum it’s so much fun
With tasteful drums and rapid strums.
Steel guitar,
Cigarettes,
At the bar,
No regrets.
Heavy box while walking blocks,
Sharing docs and talking talks.
Crows that caw,
Bells that ring,
Town grandpa,
Duo sings.
Many feels with tasty meals,
Making deals near drunken spiels.
Tired feet,
Lolling head,
Darkened streets,
Time for bed.
Day 4
A disrespectful distance from the "Church Quiet Zone" we stand and play our tunes.
I wail and scream and blast the songs of our ancestors, eliciting dollars from the mostly indifferent passersby.
"Tango?" I am asked while noodling around a complicated chart, and when I oblige she walks away regardless.
Pennies for the puppy, dollars for the dudes who strum and continue the tradition of this city.
From the quiet corridor behind us comes a yelp of recognition when I start a familiar tune on the horn
but he wanders away to the square, the yell is the only payment I'll get from him.
In a blink the shift is over, we skulk in the scant shade from the sun above, burning us in the sweltering December heat.
Day 5
The names in the night swirling around me, soaked in smoke from joyful bitter tongues.
They travel from handshakes up my arm and out the top of my head, so I leave my hat on to keep them safe—
that and the incessant mumbles of, "What's your insta?"
The salty chords we whack out into the streets lure the stumbling masses to our haven of craven fools, huddled together on both sides, seeking and giving nourishment for the soul.
For scrips and scraps do we play, begging and crying for our dollars from the blurry eyed 20-somethings clogging the path.
But loyalty amongst thieves is thick and so it be among this raggleband of rundown, unsleeping players,
all striving for another sip, another puff, another day.
Raggleband, taggleband, on we play,
The life of the party has passed away.
Our life is the streets and the streets be we
So raggleband, taggleband, out till three.
Day 6
In the quiet of a late night party city we walk, sidewalks crowded with hushed tours. BLAM BAP BOOM—and the second line arrives around a corner: bride and groom leading the march of uniformed, state-sanctioned troublemakers. The lead trumpet wails and shrieks over the cacophonic mess of bones and sousas, soaring into the stratosphere to celebrate this holy union. HONK and TOOT go the bass brass, rocking the cobblestones and nearly blasting my hat away down the street.
Quiet is what I need, so like a fool I lead the leaders, dashing ahead to get in front of the mass of suited merrymakers, hankies waving as if in a hurricane. A few blocks down they thankfully turn away, and the quiet returns to the street, creeping out of the shadows to wrap us in a blanket of relief.
Oh when the saints go marching in,
Those noisy saints go marching in,
Oh Lord exclude me from that number
So I can hear my thoughts again.
Day 7
Today there was a god.
Normally, there is no god, but today one was made in my head for an hour or two.
A blessing of this magnitude begs for want of a god to cause it, and so shall one be made.
I name you HMM, after the names the beast bears.
This name shall exist for today, and tomorrow will become just another word to say while thinking.
HMM hath blessed me today, and this hymn shall be its reward.
“Oh HMM of great coincidence,
I grant you now significance.
Your name be high,
Not just a sigh,
But mighty, with distinctiveness.
Great HMM, I thank you for this gift.
Unselfish hands revered and swift,
Mine own shall glide
And play with pride
To thank you for your thrift.
To designate a place for me
And move us pieces so we’d be
In time to meet
Out on the street;
I thank you now with glee.”
HMM shall be gone by tomorrow, my prayers and thanksgiving given today to honor it
shall be dismissed as though a leaf on the wind.
Day 8
An inversion of our sally down the Mississippi finds the swamps once hidden in the darkness now cloaked by the fog of morning, as if ashamed of the wild cavorting of the night previous. Looming in the mists rise broken pillars and supports, leading to nowhere—or perhaps somewhere long sunken in the pale waters—a path to a dead path. But the bridge ahead points me back home, safely above the waters of shame and regret, while also being a bridge back to the Big Easy, to the life it offers me.
Can I stay my course, or will the wisps out in the gloom call to me sweetly and lure me away from the road?
“Will’o’wisp, will’o’wisp, what could you say
That would make me start to doubt the way?
Some of my heart now lives in part
In NOLA by the bay.”
The wisps are my friends and they call to me
To stay forever ‘neath the big oak tree.
Their call is strong and in their song
I hear a future, oh, so free!
I must continue down the bridge; there are no turnarounds until I am out of the swamp, and it is too late to turn back today.
The song will continue in my soul until I return, triumphant and joyous.
Does time go marching on or does it sinuously slither?
Is it like a flash-in-the-pan, or do you watch a person wither
Over decades, over centuries as places rise and fall?
Time is flowing down a river; now it’s creeping to a crawl.
Is it blue when it goes faster like the scientists remark,
And is it red when you are waiting on a plane to disembark?
Does it wax and wane like moonshine when you drink a bit too much?
Can time almost stop completely when you’re really out of touch?
Can it traipse along down Lover’s Lane in unassuming bliss,
Passing couples sharing moments, stopping time just for a kiss?
What a wonder, what a marvel, this dimension we call fourth—
Is it just as arbitrary as a needle pointing north?
It makes sense when we assign it meaning; thus to each their own.
Time is just this constant thing that cannot be all-known.
I’ll grab time by the collar and I’ll wrench it to the floor!
“Carpe diem!” I will scream and hold it down forevermore,
For taking time into my hands and seizing every second
Will let me live in harmony and with my future reckon.
So does it matter if time waltzes down along the aisle?
I’ve got more life, it seems I’ll have the time to think awhile.
It’s writhing in my palm as I now have it in my hand,
The hourglass in my grasp: I’m holding back the sands
Of time by pausing everything and taking in the now:
I’ve seized the day, I’ll make the most of time; this is my vow.
(Nov. 17, 2025)
Solid shapes,
concrete shapes,
shapes both square and round,
Quiet place,
muffled place,
place of muted sound.
Underneath the screaming street,
the dirty rocks are piled neat,
there's something human in the beat
here not quite underground.
Melted ice,
brittle ice,
ICE performs a sweep.
Discarded clothes,
shredded clothes,
close their eyes and weep.
Shaking now with fury blazing,
watching neighbors slowly crazing,
finding apathy amazing—
watch their conscience die asleep.
(Mar. 18, 2026)
Taking my cat on a walk in the dark
Learning a lesson or two.
This seven pound cat ain’t a dog in the park
Observing the world all anew.
We wander together around in the lawn
Poking around in a shrub,
The moon shining brightly illumines her yawn
And up on my leg now she rubs.
She wants to go hide in the dust ‘neath the house
Watching me deep in the gloom.
A sudden commotion! She’s spotted a mouse!
And back to the house now she zooms!
(Nov. 5, 2025)
Tire tread
Tired head
Zipping on my way to bed
White clouds
White tail
Of a rabbit on the trail
Nevermind
Stop sign
Got to pause or pay a fine
Dumb cop
At the stop
Waiting for the shoe to drop
Little wave
On my way
Heading home to hit the hay
Up the stairs
On my chair
Cat is simply waiting there
Hop in bed
Tired head
Dream about the tracks I tread
(Nov. 27, 2025)
Marching home through the cozy, chill air of a December evening,
My soles playing paradiddles in the fresh snow.
“Pa, pa-ra-did-dle-did-dle, pa, pa-ra-did-dle-did-dle.”
Hands ungloved, keeping time in a rhythmic swing,
The tips of my boots make a cymbal crash
As they drag across the peak of a snow bank.
“Pssh, pssh, — pssh.”
I perform heavy flams in deeper drifts,
Steady as a postman in any kind of weather,
“Flam, flam, flam, flam.”
I am the drum major, the player, the crowd,
Alone on this silent night.
When I pause all I hear is the tickling of snowflakes
Melting swiftly on my hat and hood, keeping me company,
Becoming yet another little drum line, erratic and yet charming.
But here comes the big band! Bold band! Brash band!
Of boots stomping home in the dark windy night.
Let the cymbals crash and the bass steps boom,
And my soles play paradiddles soft and light
As I march through the snow all quiet and white.
“Pa-ra-did-dle, flam-pssh, pa-pssh-flam.
Pa-ra-pa-ra-did-dle-flam, pssh-flam-flam!”
(Dec. 2, 2025)
The walking-sweat like a drizzled vinaigrette
Adorns my brow and mingles
With the drip-drip-drap on my stocking cap
From the trees and the weeping shingles.
The lies of man are an evil plan
To cause me to be heated.
All trust has snapped with the weather maps,
My faith has been mistreated.
Soup in the air like an evening prayer,
My life is draining slowly.
With my every breath I am nearing death—
Air this humid is unholy.
(Apr. 2, 2026)
Why is it that the most lonely places are the most beautiful?
Is it the lack of people that draws the eye to things normally not seen?
Wandering to a faraway spot and pausing and listening
Is one of life’s great joys
And yet
I wish it would be just as good with a friend.
Perhaps that is what I long for in a partner
Someone who can amplify the tranquility
Providing context for the image burned into my mind
So when I think of you, all that appears is beauty and placidity.
how piteous the moon
hanged, as though in front of an executioner's gray wall
alone, the last of her kin, hunted down by the greed of those who once worshipped her
she hangs, alone, defiant though humbled.
her track slipped by, unnoticed by those who never raise their eyes from their lamps, until it seemed to cease and she was
extinguished.
(Dec. 11, 2024)
I wear my resting pants on days when
Life is just too much to bear without them
And yet it takes a lot to rest
With my resting pants upon my legs.
There are no breaks for minds like mine, my
Thoughts come through despite my weak protesting
But seeing rests when I look down
Helps me calm my overanxious mind.
The music plays forever in here
Silence might be golden as they’re saying
But I will never know true peace
Knowing too that rest is for the dead.
Is it placebo, is it fake when
Wearing resting pants can calm my worries
So what if it is all a joke
Life is bearable due to my pants.
(Feb 19, 2025)
After a long night of going from bar to bar, the tired couple rests.
Little do they know their night has only just begun.
A simple lie-down becomes a struggle as her body betrays her and a child is born
Atop her rustic blanket.
Blood and tears adorn the ground,
Life and spirit here are found.
Hands on lips to still her cry,
A newborn son who's doomed to die.
Now decades have passed and the son is partying himself,
Spending time with the men and women of the night.
She follows him to see that he is safe, that he is well among them,
Huddled in her blanket.
Blood and tears now mixed as wine,
Life and spirit intertwine.
Hands to lips to feed them all,
Her progeny now heeds his call.
She watches as he sways in the wind, gasping for breath.
His friends are cowards, hiding from the crackdowns and the beatings and the torture.
Only one remains, silently weeping into her shoulder, wiping his nose
On her blanket.
Her son is dead and in his place,
A lifeless husk, a broken face.
Spear point thrusts into his side,
Blood and tears is how he died.
After a long night of going from bar to bar, the tired couple rests.
Little do they know their night has only just begun.
A simple lie-down becomes a cuddle and her body betrays her feelings and they begin
Atop the mother’s blanket.
Blood and tears adorn the bed,
Life and spirit here are fed.
Different hands on different lips,
And muffled moaning slowly slips.
Now hours have passed and the new son is partying,
Spending this time with this woman in the night.
The mother watches from the shadows to see that he is safe
In the blanket.
Blood and tears now mixed in smoke,
Life and spirit gasp and choke.
Hands to lips to hit the vape,
As both appreciate their shapes.
She watches as they lie, panting and exhausted.
Now friends or lovers, both basking in the glow of each other’s smiles and caresses.
The mother remains, smothered to the side, weeping blood but forced to smile
As the blanket.
Her son is dead and in his place,
A peaceful soul and joyful face.
Spear point thrusts and pierces true,
Blood and tears are born anew.
(Jan 12, 2026)
These shifting colors of my lamp sing a story of quiet longing; the blues and greens fading into hotter hues and sheens, hesitantly sighing a sadness this light alone can tell.
A tale of shamefully standing by while the world watches on, ignorant to the cries of the street below.
Sing, o lamp, a sad song of colors, a dirge to the skies and the land and the stars.
Tell, o burning orb of fickle shades, what lies I tell in this coffin, this home of deceit and impotence.
Unimportant may you seem, o lamp, but your staying light guides my tongue and my bearings, both here and here.
Blue brings darkness come to light and sight; the simplest color makes the mind see and yet unsee,
pretending there’s more beyond first glance.
Pink provides stark relief; the shadows of my grave are sharper, harsher, more brutal.
Green merely hides the true colors of the room around it; dulling the sight, blending thoughts and beliefs,
deafening the sighs of the weary until they melt away.
Red is darkness personified; there is no escape, it comes and deluminates with no pity, no mercy.
Orange begets normality; nothing changes except the perspective, the subtle varying of banality in this place is
nothing to take note of, nothing to notice.
Purple does not exist; it is death itself, burning eyes and walls alike.
For death may be near, I keep my lamp lit, burning day and night to guide my mind, my self, me.
I pray, o lamp, for just one reprieve, a simple pause from your relentless beams.
I pray for a time when darkness may be welcomed into these chambers.
Cease, and bring peace to me on this deathbed that I may rest beyond all nightmares.
(April 27, 2025)
Crispy chicken, boba tea
Things I thought too good for me
Richities far out of reach
As far away as Bondi Beach
Take a bite and bite the cost
A life worth living’s never lost
Although I may be poor as dirt
There’s ways for me to stop the hurt
Like buying tasty food tonight
To rest and eat in dusky light
Take a bite and bite the cost
A life worth living’s never lost
Guilt from being left behind
Shame from always being declined
Feelings I’ve now moved beyond
Or so I say; myself I’ve conned
Take a bite and bite the cost
A life worth living’s never lost
But let me chill and eat my meal
My boba tea will slowly heal
These open wounds upon my soul
My crispy chicken fills that hole
Take a bite and bite the cost
A life worth living’s never lost
(May 23, 2025)
The sky is a-light with a sodium hue
The barenaked trees are a-framing the view
Alone twixt the dead do I sit and I chew
My Taco John’s.
It seems far too late to hear crickets and frogs,
The summer persisted, it drags and it slogs,
Now finally, autumn arrives with its fogs
And morning frost.
A headstone is sinking down into the grave
Beside me and tells me it's too late to save
The money I spent on my impulsive crave—
The nacho cheese.
The leaves should be covering all of the dead,
But cleanliness is what's desired instead.
I hate the brown grass and I'm shaking my head—
Return to dust.
Alone do I sit and I think about these
Most trivial thoughts about lights and the trees
While munching my junk food, potatoes and cheese—
My Taco John’s.
(October 10, 2025)
Her fingers shone and sparkled with a lovely crimson hue
As she clicked and clacked her needles, keeping Charlotte in her view.
She shares her favorite hobby on this little rendezvous;
Ruby rings and spinnerets and half a glass of wine.
Charlotte’s hands began to wander up her winding hair,
Inching closer, ever closer to the weaver, quick and fair.
The intoxicating perfume on her nape was quite the snare;
Ruby rings and spinnerets and half a glass of wine.
Now the needles long forgotten on a pile of twisted thread,
As the spinner weaves a blanket over Charlotte on the bed,
Her wrists lashed tight to bedposts, legs now splayed across the spread;
Ruby rings and spinnerets and half a glass of wine.
When her meal was over, on the balcony apart,
The Spider took a drag upon a fag and viewed her art.
Poor dainty Charlotte, smitten with a dashed and broken heart;
Ruby rings and spinnerets and half a glass of wine.
She dove into her dismal den to click and clack again,
Weaving images of darkness, being bound again by chains,
Finding solace in the sin that she commits to dull the pain—
Cigarettes, barbiturates, a drink most saccharine;
Ruby rings and spinnerets and half a glass of wine.
(November 25th, 2025)
My peers mostly seek out a sexual love
I seem then to have an unusual love.
Physical form is not what I desire
But I still have aspects of usual love.
I express distaste for gratification
My bedmate bemoaning this is cruel love.
Platonic, aesthetic forms of attraction
Blend seamlessly with intellectual love.
Somehow this all is a novel idea
Too many dismiss an asexual love.
Love and then sex being tied to each other
Makes a burdensome inexact dual love.
But I, Joe Sandy, have come to accept this
My special unique unusual love.
(April 30, 2025)
I rest my head upon a pipe
Lying on the ground
While venting all my fears and gripes
And sorrows which abound
O wondrous woman beaming bright
Your radiance makes me bawl
You bathe me in your precious light
As on the ground I sprawl
I whisper all my faults and vice
And every little sin
I see your face; only a slice
With just a cheeky grin
O wondrous woman beaming bright
Your smile makes me cry
You bathe me in your precious light
A silent lullaby
Just half of you is far enough
For me to know your love
I cannot lie, I cannot bluff
You see all from above
O wondrous woman beaming bright
Your visage makes me weep
You bathe me in your precious light
And lull me into sleep
(May 6, 2025)
I’ve lain in bed for half the day
My body weak; my brain like hay
There’s chores to do and bills to pay—
And I cannot do it.
I’ve had a drink and fed my cat
But stumbled back to bed and that
Is where I am, just lying flat—
No, I cannot do it.
My stench is louder than my voice
But getting up is painful now
The time is ticking; make a choice—
A shower’s what I need, somehow.
The call of slumber hits my head
I sprawl across my comfy bed
Just like my cat my limbs are spread—
Still, I cannot do it.
I lie awake all in a haze
From dust adrift from northern blaze
The light comes in by lazy rays—
But I cannot do it.
So here I lie, both half asleep
And half awake, yet never resting,
My one day off now feels so cheap
Despite my broken self protesting.
The world demands I move again
To get tasks done by the day’s end
But being strong means playing pretend—
That I can do it.
(July 15, 2025)
Bless me Father, for I have sinned
I've let my past go in the wind.
And the blood of the lamb washes all my sins away,
Your life on the scales outweighs
My sin.
Bless me Father, for I have sinned.
Barty was the one they skinned.
My heart was raw, as Barty's ruptured flesh,
As my life was made afresh
Within.
But Father, now you feel my pain!
The blood of Christ now from you drains.
My handiwork has set me free
From chains that you had forced on me.
On confessional floor the blood is pooling,
Pulse is gone, the body cooling.
I grace your lips with a goodbye kiss
My body shuddering in bliss
A moment I could never miss
Taste your soul in the abyss—
Goodbye, Father.
Bless me Father, for I have sinned.
My past is gone now on the wind.
And this vengeance sweet has slaked my bloody thirst.
In baptism am I immersed,
Born anew.
Free from my sins at last,
I leave you dead
To rot in my past.
(October 3, 2025)
I just want to sleep
and drift away down a stream
of red and orange leaves, breathing
in the silky-smooth maple until I drown
forever in beautiful bliss. Just let me breathe
in the crunchy brown hickory until I choke, until
I cough my heart out. I want to lie, just lie forever
with the rustling of the leaves to comfort me, to hold
me in their cold embrace until I can't move anymore.
Take this feeling of comfort and fill me with it, through
and through. But I can't just lie, I must walk the paths
along this pristine campus, avoiding the leaves and the
streams I long for. Always inside, breathing in air, rather
than leaves. I wish that I could just breathe in the leaves
till there's nothing left of me. And perhaps I want someone
there. Someone to breathe the leaves with me. There's so
little time, we all rush so fast and there's no time to stop
and just lie. I wish there was some way I could stop and
breathe the leaves with someone. What do I have to show
for 20 years of life? Lies and deception, tricks and guile.
There's no rational reason for me to be around here. I
should be home, breathing the leaves. I run the same
damn races each and every day, wearing myself thinner
and thinner until I too shall become a leaf and die, laying
on the ground, waiting for someone to come and step
on me, until I shrivel and grind away into dust that
shall be forgotten. Why does this even have to
happen? Why must I shrivel? Is it for some
greater purpose? To feed the minds and
souls of others with myself? I am not
ready for that. I just wish to lie
and breathe the leaves of maple,
oak and hickory. Smell the death
around me, and revel in it. Just
breathe, breathe, breathe.
That's what I can't do,
sitting here, surrounded
by air. I can't breathe
properly; I need the
leaves. A stream
of flowing leaves
with stately trees
on either side,
dripping into
the flow
while I
dream.
(December 2019)
Love and care in large amounts
Heaped upon me from afar
But only some of all this counts
It really matters who you are
Twenty four is not that old
And yet I'm feeling older than
Dragons atop their piles of gold
My hourglass is losing sand
But I still have some ticking time
Perhaps far more or less than you
And yet I sit and make these rhymes
Me sharing thoughts both false and true.
I hope to live for nine more years
And then another day
Or maybe two or even three
If I can find my way
But in these very precious nine
I have so much to do
And I will treasure all the time
That I can share with y'all
(November 6th, 2023)