Making your ex fall in love with you again may seem like an impossible task, but it is possible.

To achieve this, you have to think about what's messed up the relationship in the first place, then find ways to show the best version of yourself.

Also, you will need to talk to your ex about your feelings and what you intend to do with them at some point.

1. Keep your distance. While you decide if you want to resume the relationship, you should not be in contact with your ex.

It's important to have no contact so you can deal with your emotions, process the breakup, and prepare to take the next step.

Even if you decide that you want to get back with this person, you will need time for yourself and, in the same way, also her.

Don't text or reply to her until you feel like you've had enough time to process the breakup. This can be difficult, but it's for the best.

2. Determine if your ex is available. Before you try to determine if getting back together with your ex is the right decision, you need to find out if he is available.

If it's been a while since you broke up, then chances are she's dating someone else. In this case, you may be better off looking into a relationship with someone else.

• Don't try to get together with your ex if he sees someone else. Just pursue your own interests, hang out with other people, and be patient.

3. Consider why you want to get back together with your ex. Even if the relationship was great, sometimes it's better to forget about an ex or a relationship. Before you try to get back together with her, consider the reasons why you want to.

• Some good reasons to get back together include: your schedules weren't in sync the first time you were together, you needed more time to get over a previous relationship, or you've developed a new point of view about what your ex brought to your life.

• Some bad reasons for trying to get back together with your ex include the following: you're afraid of being alone (of course, you're lonely after ending a relationship, but that doesn't mean you should get back together), you miss the familiarity (again, there's no problem with this feeling, but that doesn't mean you should get back together with your ex) or you're jealous of their new relationship (again, a completely understandable feeling, but not a good basis for trying to get back together).

• You should turn to a trusted friend, family member, or therapist to help you consider your reasons for wanting to get back together with your ex. They will help you put mediocre reasons aside and get on with your life.

4. Determine if the relationship was healthy and if it's worth reviving. In addition to considering your reasons for wanting to get back together with your ex, you should also consider the overall relationship to determine if it's worth reviving. If you broke up because the relationship was bad for either of you, then you should take some more time to consider whether the relationship is worth reviving.

• For example, if you used to fight a lot and didn't enjoy spending time together, then it's probably not worth reviving the relationship.

5. Make a list of pros and cons in case you have questions. If you have a lot of mixed feelings about why you want to get back together with your ex and whether it's worth getting back into the relationship, To assist you in making a decision, make a list of advantages and disadvantages.

Be honest with yourself as you do it and don't leave anything out because you think it's insignificant. Add as much as you can to get a good perspective on the relationship and make the decision.

1. Focus on yourself. Even if you are absolutely sure that you want to get back together with your ex, it is important that you take some time to focus on yourself first. Use the extra time you have to improve as a person, and it may be easier to get back together with your ex as a result. Some things you can do to focus on yourself include:

• take up a new hobby

• Improve your health with a new exercise and diet regimen

• Begin a notebook in which you can write down your ideas and feelings.

• Spend more time with your friends

2. Act casual. If you want to get back together with your ex, it's important not to show desperation. Therefore, it is essential that this person does not know immediately that you are interested in getting back with that person. Otherwise, you may scare her off and ruin your chances of reviving the relationship.

Give yourself plenty of time before contacting your ex again. If you meet by accident, act casual. Do not let him discover your interest in resuming the relationship.

3. Reestablish contact. Send your ex a text message to reconnect with him. Text messages are ideal because they are more casual than phone calls or emails. Also, texting is less likely to be shared or discussed, so it's a more private form of communication with your ex.

• Keep the message light and casual. Saying something dramatic like "I can't live without you" isn't a good idea. Tell him about anything amusing that happened to you or something that made you think of him.

• Make sure you are sober when you resume contact with your ex. Drunk texting can be a recipe for disaster.

4. Get together for coffee or lunch. The best time to get back together with an ex is during the day because it will seem less serious than a late-night reunion.

Ask your ex if he would like to meet you for coffee or lunch. This will give you a chance to catch up, break the ice, and help you decide if you should continue to pursue reconciliation.

• Don't say anything about getting back together during the first meeting. Just have a nice, fun chat, and leave it at that for now.

• Make sure you look great the first time you get together again. Looking your best will help you feel confident and make it more likely that your ex will want to get back together with you.

5. Remind your ex of the happy times. Rekindling an old flame might be as simple as talking about wonderful recollections. By reminding your ex of the happy times you shared, you'll allow him to see the good things in your relationship and make him more likely to get back together with you.

Keep in mind that you'll also have to talk about the bad parts of the relationship at some point, but enjoy talking about the happy memories at first.

6. Show your best resources. As you try to make your ex fall in love with you again, you should consider the things that attracted him to you in the first place and find ways to expose them.

For example, if your ex was attracted to your sense of humor, he looks for ways to make you laugh. If she's always been impressed by your cooking skills, he's looking for a way to casually mention something you recently cooked.

7. Be patient. Although it may be difficult, you need to be very patient when talking to your ex again. If your ex doesn't respond to your first text, don't keep sending them to try and get him to text back. Just wait for him to answer you. If he doesn't, then he tries again in a few days.

8. Watch for signs of interest. If your ex hasn't responded to any of your texts or has a cold demeanor at other times when you've chatted, then it's safe to assume that getting together isn't an option right now. But if his attitude is welcoming, friendly, and excited to hear from you, then you probably have a chance.

Just make sure you don't have too many expectations, even if the signs seem very positive. Your ex may just be nice.

1. Express what you have in mind. You'll have to tell your ex how you feel and what you want to do about it at some point. Having this conversation can be awkward, but if your ex hasn't mentioned getting back together, then you can. Be sure to make clear your willingness to work on some things and your interest in getting back together.

Try saying something like, "I think in this time we've been apart I've really matured and I'd like to give our relationship another chance, are you interested?"

2. You should be prepared to talk about the negative aspects of the first time you were together. It is inevitable that they discuss the reasons why they broke up the first time. Your ex may be skeptical of your maturity and willingness to change, so this is something you'll need to reaffirm.

Make sure you're prepared to talk about what you've done or will do to make sure the relationship doesn't run into the same problems this time.

3. Commit to change. If you say you will work on some things or promise to change in some way, be prepared to do the things you promised. If you don't, then the relationship can end again very soon. Make sure that you and your partner are clear about the aspects of the relationship that you need to work on and that you carry it out.

4. Anticipate rejection. In some cases, reconciliation is simply not possible. If your ex doesn't want to try one more time, he respects his honesty with you and doesn't pressure or harass him to come back. Chances are, you both need more time or the relationship isn't worth reviving.

• If you feel like your approach is too intense, it probably is. Just calm down a bit and relax.

• Try not to be pushy. Make him think that you're not looking for his attention, but that you care.

• One thing to remember when trying to get back together with your ex is that if it doesn't work out or if he doesn't want to get back with you, you shouldn't try to force him. Remember that you deserve to be with someone who wants to be with you and you should not insist on someone who does not want it.