Your relationship with your ex-boyfriend is over and you want to make sure he knows exactly what he's been missing. Whether or not you want to get back together with him, you want to remind him that you are a good catch and something is missing.

Consider who he is as a person and who you are as a person, and show him what he's lacking. Focusing on yourself rather than him is the best approach to show him what he's missing. So keep your distance from it, make positive changes in your own life, and grasp the potential for new experiences.

1. Keep your distance. He can't decide when and if you speak again. Of course, you have to respect his limits or his requests, but if he left it open, you choose when and how to talk again, whether by phone, text, or email. It may be difficult at first, but with practice, it will be easier to keep your distance.

• Your control over the initial communications shows him that he no longer has unlimited access to you.

• Go at least a month after your breakup before talking again.

• For example, if you used to text her the day of a doctor's appointment to remind her to leave, don't do it now. He will have to trust his schedule, not you.

• Or, don't call to tell them your favorite movie is on TV. Instead, pop some popcorn and enjoy your show.

2. Accept positive changes. After the breakup, it's time to reinvent yourself a bit. For you, not for your ex or anyone else. You deserve a fresh start. Maybe you've been interested in joining a club or taking up a hobby - now is a perfect time.

Or maybe you'd like to connect with someone you've lost contact with - now's a perfect time. Whatever you choose, give yourself permission to change, to be even better than yesterday, and do it for yourself and no one else.

• Your ex will see positive changes in you and notice that you move on and grow without him. I hope he will be happy for you and will certainly regret not being part of it.

3. Define your relationship. It's important that you clearly understand what your relationship is and isn't. You are together or you are not. It can be hard to keep your word, but you need to tell him that you're either together or done for.

There is no on and off option and you won't stick around for him to come back whenever he wants.

• It's about asserting control over yourself and your emotional health.

• You can tell her, “Now that we've broken up, we need to figure out what our relationship is and how we're going to interact with each other, if at all. There can be no ambiguity here and I need closure.

1. Exercise. Exercise really nourishes the body, mind, and heart. Whether you like exercising at first or not, keep going. Make exercise a new habit. Your body will get stronger, your brain will work better, and you will feed your heart.

• Many gyms now offer monthly memberships, which means you get all the benefits of a gym without a long contract to bog you down.

2. Be social. Go out, be social and enjoy your life. Use this opportunity to reconnect with people and activities that bring you joy.

It is also an opportunity to discover new social activities that you have wanted to look into. He'll probably hear about your new social life, or he'll even see pictures online, and he'll see that you're living your life without him.

• see your friends

• Go eat

• Go to the theater

• Go to festivals - make it a day trip

• Join a Meetup group

• Join a hobby club

• Don't go overboard with pictures of you dating, as it could make it look like you've lost control over your breakup.

3. Practice positive thinking. There is an idea that you attract what you think about, and if you think positive thoughts, you will attract positive energy into your life.

Also, by practicing positive thinking, you will learn how to calm all those negative and doubtful thoughts that tend to crop up when you least expect them. Positive thinking is a habit that takes work but is worth it.

• Start small. Think of negative thoughts that you tend to have and how you could make them positive. Then, the next time you have a negative idea, push it out of your mind and replace it with a good one.

• For example, you might have a recurring thought that you're just not as talented as everyone else and that you'll never succeed. Counter this negative discourse. You're just expressing your dread and concern, not stating a fact. Instead of letting your fears and worries spread, correct your fearful thinking.

• For example, you might say, “Everyone has a talent. I just have to find mine. And, “There are many ways to be successful. I have already succeeded in many aspects of my life. Every day, I'll look for new methods to succeed, and I'll keep looking for ways to improve. "

4. Focus on your strengths. You have assets to work with, and you should capitalize on them. Focusing on what you do well will encourage you to continue to thrive and succeed. Your success is yours and it's something no one can take away from you.

You build your strength by harnessing your own talents, and like everything, the more you do it, the better off you will become. And your continuing development will simply open up more doors to personal development and advancement.

• You could consider your professional strengths, your personal talents, or even your artistic abilities. Combine your strengths to develop something truly unique for you.

• For example, you have enjoyed baking as a hobby for years. You love to make homemade treats and share them with your loved ones. Consider starting a blog where you showcase your baking skills and recipes.

• Or maybe you're good at organizing and juggling complex tasks. You are the person people turn to at work to solve problems, especially when they seem too big to handle. You can use these skills and start your own business as a personal assistant or even a life coach.

• Maybe you absolutely love animals and would like to spend more time with them. You have an almost empathetic connection with them. Take that special talent and volunteer at an animal rehabilitation sanctuary or your local zoo.

5. Get to know yourself. You might ask yourself “what now?” after a breakup. You are so used to sharing experiences with another person that you may have lost touch with yourself.

Getting to know yourself and figuring out who you are, your likes and dislikes, and even what you think about religious and political issues are key to moving forward. When you move on, he'll see what's missing.

• Start simple and make a list. Make a list of things you like to do for fun, adventures you'd like to take, dream vacations, and hobbies. Make as many lists as needed. Considering yourself and writing down your thoughts will help you get to know yourself better.

• Or you can meditate, formally or less formally, by simply closing your eyes, breathing calmly, and allowing yourself to sit quietly. Acknowledge and calm your thoughts so that you are alone with yourself without distractions.

1. Make new friends. Whether you lost a few friends during the breakup or not, it's a good idea to make new friends after the breakup. This doesn't mean that you should get rid of your current friends, but that you should expand your social circle.

Making new acquaintances will expose you to new experiences while also allowing you to grow apart from your ex. If you don't share the same social circle, he won't always be able to watch over you either, giving you some room to heal.

• The digital age has really opened up options for meeting people. You can participate on message boards or join local Facebook or MeetUp communities.

• These groups can be about shared interests (books, movie genres, or even music), or about geography (city, state, neighborhood), or even shared experiences (parenthood, divorce, veterans).

• Also, your local bookstores and cafes will likely have groups that meet regularly for a common interest or goal.

• If you go to school, your high school or college will have social, sports, and academic clubs you can join.

2. Treat yourself. You deserve to treat yourself to something you normally wouldn't splurge on. Go ahead - get a little pampered, or go exploring, go on a date with yourself, or maybe get that handbag you've been eyeing for a long time. Think of one or two things you would really like and give yourself a gift.

• Try going alone on a trip or vacation. Take the time to explore a new place or discover something new on your own.

• Take care of yourself with self-care gifts. Now might be the time to buy that massage package or those new pots and pans you've been reviewing.

• Go out - go to a bookstore, or dinner, or even a movie.

3. Be kind to yourself. You know it's important to be kind to others because it helps someone else and also makes you feel better. But, especially now, you must remember to be kind to yourself. You take care of others and now is the time to take care of yourself. He will regret missing your kindness.

• Stop and have a coffee on the way to work.

• Go get that new outfit, game, or sports gear.

• Compliment yourself - find something every day that you congratulate yourself on.

• Be patient with yourself.

4. Enjoy. You want him to regret losing you, but the most important goal should be your own happiness. Go out and have fun! Don't worry about his feelings. You can't control how he feels. But you can have fun - hanging out with friends, playing miniature golf, swimming, camping - just go out and have fun.

5. Create new habits. It's a little different from changing your routine. Creating new habits means developing new positive behaviors that become almost second nature with repetition.

The new habits you develop should be created for the sole purpose of improving your life or making you happier. After all, your happiness is great for you and attractive for others.

• Your habits might be learning-based, like learning two new foreign language vocabulary words every morning or spending 20 minutes reading the news.

• Your habits can also be more physical, like doing two minutes of sit-ups and push-ups every morning.

• Or they can be spiritually based, such as reading a religious text for half an hour each evening.

• Always be authentic and true to yourself. If you feel like you have to fake it with your boyfriend, chances are he's not the one for you. Find someone who would love you just the way you are.

• Act only in a way that makes you feel comfortable with yourself. You don't have to do anything for him or with him if you don't really want to or don't feel ready to do it.