3 AM to 3PM
Saturday, September 28, 2024
Steam
2 Hour Play Session
In the game Gone Home, you play as the older sister Katie, who has just come home from a European trip to find that her sister, Sam, is not at home/has appeared to have run away. You go through the old, rather large house to discover what happened and why Sam has run away. The game tells a story of discovery, of sexuality, of struggle with oneself, and so on.
One of the first things I noticed about the atmosphere is that it had a little bit of an eerie feeling, the house felt almost too empty- it creaked and groaned as any old house would, but the storm and occasional thunder made it have more spooky vibes than I had expected.
The house, which you soon learn that many refer to as the "Psycho House", has many secret doorways and compartments that you find later on with the help of Sam's notes and audio clips that you collected as you move forward, it was a lot of fun too to learn that the house was haunted by their Uncle, who went "crazy" over some conspiracies. And it seemed as if their dad was somewhat following in the uncle's footsteps, as seen by books he was trying and possibly failing, to sell.
One of the first rooms you get to enter is Sam's room, which shows her strong personality and the things she values- you get to see she liked to game, she liked some punk/rock girl bands (you find cassettes around the house and can play them) you also get to see that at first, she struggled to find friends at school, till she met a punkish girl named Lonnie. She talks about Lonnie, and how she feels more comfortable around her than she ever has with anyone else. The two girls frequently exchanged notes, visited each other, etc, you see the two also went on some ghost hunts around the house, and at some point, Sam helped dye Lonnie's hair.
Something else I noticed was that the parents seemed to be, struggling in their marriage. Some notes and cards that I came across gave the intention of it appearing like they were both struggling to find love/intimacy in their relationship. A flyer that I came across had marriage counseling on it, and then I came across a letter addressed to the mom about a new guy at work- almost as if an affair could've or might've happened. They also seemed to be a bit stricter with Sam at some points.
I got to see that Sam wanted to be a writer, having a rather strong personality in some assignments you come across from school and the short stories you find around the house, you also get to see that Lonnie wants to be in the army, which Sam notes is a little odd because of Lonnie's punk rock nature and aversion to authority. You find out later on that Lonnie seemed to have a struggling childhood, being a child of divorce and talking about her crazy mom.
As you continue through, you get to experience the progression of Sam and Lonnie's relationship to the point where Sam does confirm they are secretly dating, talking about how there are these moments where it's just the two of them, but also talking about how kids at school are probably going to notice, and when Sam's parents find out they go into denial and tell her its "just a phase."
Towards the end of the game you find out that Lonnie is going to basic soon, and that means the two will be separated, and it seems to tear Sam apart as she doesn't want to be apart from Lonnie. Eventually, you do discover why Sam ran away- after going through the attic in Sam's red room, where you find pictures of Sam and Lonnie and even the two matching pendants with their initials engraved in them, you find out that Lonnie had called Sam and told her she doesn't want to be away from her, and that the two can grab her car and just drive and drive.
(Sam's bedroom.)
(One of the many cassette tapes.)
(The attic, where the red room is.)
(The parent's bedroom, where one of the secret pathways is located.)
Throughout this game, not only do you get to experience the spooky vibes of an old mansion- but you also get to experience a story told through notes, audio clips, and imagery. The story is one that I wouldn't call unheard of, but one that should be given a listen to as it tells the story of identity, sexuality, and finding the courage to be true to yourself. We see that in the way Sam decides to go with Lonnie and run away together, as we do learn that Lonnie's mother probably isn't the most supportive and it seems Sam's parents are in denial about who Sam loves.
You learn that Sam seemed to struggle with the adjustment of school, and how her classmates perceived her as the girl who lived in the "Psycho House", finding that maybe she was even bullied for it when you come across a crumpled paper in a trashcan while exploring the house. But that seems to change when she meets Lonnie, who seems to be outgoing and a go-getter in a sense, she and Lonnie hit it off well and Sam describes it as feeling very comfortable with her, unlike the times she's spent with others girls or Daniel, the "default friend." We get to see as Sam probably starts to feel a bit more adventurous and takes some risks- like lying to her parents so she can go with Lonnie to see a band and spend the night at a friend of hers house, or perhaps getting into a bit more trouble by trying to help Lonnie out when she got in trouble with the school, all because Lonnie tried to defend Sam by vandalizing a locker after Sam's had been vandalized. But even if from Sam's parent's perspective, their child seems to be getting into more trouble all because she met that one girl, for Sam it seems like she was finally finding a place for herself, finding out who she was and who she wanted to be. We see throughout the little snippets we see that she has feelings for Lonnie, and that is only confirmed when the two finally kiss. Of course, now comes the struggles of keeping such a relationship a secret, and how we learn a little more about Lonnie- and how her home life was or is. We know she calls her mother a crazy Christian, and how she has always wanted to be in the army- we soon find out that Lonnie is supposed to leave for basic sooner rather than later, and it seems to cause distress in Sam, as she wishes she could follow Lonnie. The two had talked about how Lonnie would've eventually needed to go to basic that Sam got the rather amazing scholarship to a creative writing school, and that they would eventually need to part ways. But as we learn, Lonnie couldn't go through with it- she had gotten off the bus that was going to basic and called Sam, saying that the two should run away together. Of course, there were probably a few factors into why Sam decided to run away with Lonnie- probably because she loved her and her parents seemed to be in heavy denial about their daughter's sexuality. But Sam seems to have finally found her identity, herself, learning with Lonnie in a way. Sam seemed to have always known she was this way for a long time, and it seemed it only took a little push in the right direction for her to really reveal it, not only to herself but to others.
While I can't necessarily relate to Sam in the sense of sexuality, I can relate to the sense of identity, and how hard that can be sometimes. How hard it can be to find it and also accept it, especially if people around you aren't supportive or don't believe you. I found myself able to empathize with Sam and Lonnie, as the two had their own separate but similar struggles. This story is a well-told one and one that should be heard, as it does touch upon subjects that some people might be struggling to come to terms with or even just to show someone they are not alone in this endeavor.
Some questions I had throughout playing:
If Sam's parents had a different reaction to her coming out, how differently could the story have gone?
If Lonnie had never talked to Sam, where would she be now?
Did Sam see the struggle her parents were going through with their marriage? Or did they keep it under wraps?
Did they free their Uncle or did they just invite a demon in? (a bit of a silly one I will admit but I am curious if that house is more haunted now)
Does my view on sexuality affect how I perceive the people around me?
How often is it that we forget how our dismissive or inattentiveness can affect the people around us?
Putting myself in Sam's shoes, would I have reacted to her parents differently? Would I have decided to run away?