phony friends

by Lindsey Ehrlich, Reporter/Web Designer

Opinion

Sometimes, I think I am talking to phones rather than humans. Honestly, I could be fooled. I might as well duct tape people’s phones to my face so they’ll look at me for more than two seconds. It seems as though no matter where I am, there is always a phone pinging for its owner or someone hunched over their screen, chatting online with friends. Though I have seen it countless times, it still hurts just the same. I am not proposing we revert back to the stone age and babble like baboons with grunts and screams. I am simply asking the people of this world to put down their phones and enjoy each other’s company.

I’ve encountered this issue many times myself, which is partly why I take so much interest in it. One memory that still lingers is when my friend and I were walking home, talking and laughing as friends do. There was a break in the dialogue, and right as I was about to spark new conversation, she pulled out her earbuds to listen to some of her favorite songs. She made a short comment about not having any time to listen to music. I was hurt but said nothing. To me, she was silently saying my company was so bland that she needed to retreat to her phone to find entertainment. The rest of the walk was awkward for me, and we exchanged no words after that. We have talked twice since then.

On a separate occasion, I sat with two or three friends in the lunchroom, chatting over sandwiches and sliced fruit. One of their phones rang with the alert of a new Instagram follower or a new text from Mom. In an instant, the faces I was looking at turned to hair as they all craned their necks to scroll through their new follower’s Instagram page or read the fine print of the grocery list Mom had sent them. Subject to peer pressure, I followed suit and decided just to swipe left and right between my home screen and my apps until one of them returned to the conversation.

Two words. Crazy. Eights. Maybe I am just salty because I have an Android, but it seems a little exclusive to me when people create group chats to play Crazy Eights, and I’m left sitting there with nothing to do. “Buy an iPhone,” you might say. That is not the point. Audrey Kreick ‘23 shares her experience with the popular game Crazy Eights: “We were at the library, and everyone was on their phone playing games. I had no one to talk to because they were all glued to their screens. Then, I offered to play Uno with them, but they declined and continued playing Crazy Eights.” Like I said, two words. Crazy. Eights.

I cannot say I am guilt-free. I have been the perpetrator just as many times as I have been the victim. I remember being excited about receiving my first phone. Soon after I got it, I went to a sleepover at a friend’s house for their birthday. The gathering was small. I bobbed my head to music piping through my dollar store earbuds as we drew pictures, played games, and talked the night away. My music taste was questionable, but that is beside the point. It feels different to be the perpetrator than to be the victim. It feels “cool” to flex your newest technology upgrade on the people who merely want to chat. The people who deal with it are definitely not thinking about how cool your phone is.

Just as there is etiquette at the dinner table, there is etiquette in any social setting. The British royals take etiquette to an extreme level, insisting on holding their forks face-down and only touching a knife with their right hand. There is no need for strict rules like these; I will only ask for one thing. People: stop giving attention to your phones during conversations. It only creates tension and awkwardness for the other person. You want your friends to feel valued when they are with you, right? Then, give them the attention they deserve.

DISCLAIMER: The opinions, beliefs, and viewpoints expressed by the various authors in this paper do not necessarily reflect the opinions, beliefs, and viewpoints of Kamiak High School or The Gauntlet.