Since 8th grade, I smiled almost every day. I laughed almost every day. I said I was fine every day. It was something I learned to do, so no one would ask me questions.  I was and am extremely self-conscious of my body and what others thought of me. I kept every snide remark, every joke, every comment inside my heart and let it float around in my head until eventually I began to believe them all. I have never hated anything or anyone as much as I've hated myself. I wouldn't know how to express the thoughts in my head and I feared doing it because it just made them more real. But it reached its climax this year. At the Fall Retreat, I was hit with the full force of what I was feeling and somehow, he had taken notice of my demeanor and asked me how I was feeling. 

Some part me told me I could trust him but I also know that could never be able to say any of my thoughts out loud. I wrote to him my first letter and it was also the first time I was ever honest with someone else how I felt. I didn't think he would have accepted my form of communication but he did. And eventually I talked to him in person about it and he was patient with me. I was extremely uncomfortable with him at first and there were periods of silence where I would struggle to have my response flow past my lips. I couldn't even look him in the eyes. But he never pushed and he never pried. I eventually ended up where I would write and he would talk out loud and then it would just continue from there. And that honestly made me place my trust and my faith in him. He explained to me how I shouldn't let others define me and that the way I view myself is quite different from the way others viewed me. We would do this every couple of weeks and I don't think I've ever left the same way I entered his office. Something that he gave me that no one else did was hope. He continued to show me a world outside of the one I had painted for myself and how to stand up on my own. At this point I'm still learning to crawl. He taught me that people show love in different ways and that even though it makes me feel unloved, it’s not their intent and sometimes it’s just all they know. I came to learn about what makes me feel loved and through my behavior how I show others my love for them.  

He became not only a mentor but a friend and brother to me. He encouraged me when I felt like I wasn't good enough. I liked the fact that I could tell him something random and he'd remember. Or he'd show interest when I tell him about my day and things that excite me, makes me happy, sad, mad and everything else. Or even when it’s silent, the silence has always been comfortable. And he is always honest and open. Whether I came to him with a deep or a funny question, he always took time to answer me and I know I can be keeping him from his work at times but he still made time for me. He created a safe space for me and I don't think that I could ever repay him enough for that. He really is a gem and it makes me sad that I'm only getting to know him in my last years at Bard. 

I am writing on behalf of Jeffery Moss. Originally hired to work in our admissions office, Jeffery’s passion for social justice and youth development has propelled him into counseling and leadership roles at Bard High School Early College, while he continues to excel in his admissions position.

In line with the admissions work, Jeffery was tasked with a mission to recruit high achieving students for our early college program from schools with the lowest college readiness rates.  While most colleagues in the past have embraced this type of recruitment work, Jeffery took the assignment to a whole new level.  He embraced this goal and looked at our program holistically.  He wondered, “How can we support these students once they enroll in our school?  What kind of culture do we currently have here at BHSEC?”  Jeffery viewed our culture from a systemic lens and then developed a robust Diversity Initiative program that our students now fondly refer to as the D.I. 

Jeffery’s goals were lofty.  He advertised to attract students into this organization. Once he formed a substantially sized group, he planned thoughtful retreats, trained students and introduced language such as “ally” and “microaggressions” to the student body.  He organized a school-wide sit-in aimed at discussing our school culture, race, and privilege.  He taught our D.I. students how to speak to larger audiences, carry themselves in conversations, and find their voices through a professional development series. Jeffery also empowered students to plan their own events that would focus on social justice and community building. Lastly, he introduced Ally Week to our campus where each day of the week is devoted toward bringing the students and staff together through a variety of events: a town hall to the introduce the idea of safe zones, celebrations of culture through food and performance, jazz and civil rights, Derailment Bingo, engaging our students in discussions about admissions etc.  None of these descriptions can possibly convey the energy and the enthusiasm that these programs have inspired across age levels. 

Having worked in the counseling field for nearly 20 years, I have not yet encountered someone like Jeffery who is as fearless and motivated as he is sensitive and compassionate.  Recently, we surveyed our high school students to assess their coping strategies and in this survey we asked if students have an adult in the building who they can turn to when distressed. Although Jeffery is not an official guidance counselor, his name was mentioned repeatedly.  Clearly, he has incited their trust through his warm disposition.

I know he will be an extraordinary counselor who makes a big impact on our school at a systemic and personal level and couldn’t recommend anyone more highly.