Pace is an important part of fiction writing, and it's especially important for action and suspense. If each paragraph describes thirty seconds of action, the audience will get bored by the end of the page. It's the writer's job to build interest before something notable happens, or to have the notable action happen suddenly or unexpectedly.
In music, there are changes in tempo, dynamics, and feeling through the course of a song, and the same general ideas can be used in fiction, and particularly in storytelling.
Sometimes it's a good idea to describe the scene before the action starts. If you write a short paragraph talking about the buildings or trees or color of the sky, the story pauses for a little while, which makes subsequent actions feel more vibrant. At the same time, the reader is better able to picture the situation.
Here's an example from the beginning of The Tale of Peter Rabbit by Beatrix Potter (1902).
Once upon a time there were four little Rabbits, and their names were— Flopsy, Mopsy, Cotton-tail, and Peter.
They lived with their Mother in a sand-bank, underneath the root of a very big fir tree.
“Now, my dears,” said old Mrs. Rabbit one morning, “you may go into the fields or down the lane, but don’t go into Mr. McGregor’s garden: your Father had an accident there; he was put in a pie by Mrs. McGregor.”
This is a children’s story, so the introduction is simple: the people, the place, and a preview to the journey that will soon commence.
Here's an example from the beginning of 2BR02B by Kurt Vonnegut (1962).
Everything was perfectly swell.
There were no prisons, no slums, no insane asylums, no cripples, no poverty, no wars.
All diseases were conquered. So was old age.
Death, barring accidents, was an adventure for volunteers.
The population of the United States was stabilized at forty-million souls.
One bright morning in the Chicago Lying-in Hospital, a man named Edward K. Wehling, Jr., waited for his wife to give birth. He was the only man waiting. Not many people were born a day any more.
The first five sentences make profound statements about the world, and then the story focuses on one man.
Here's an example from the beginning of Lamb to the Slaughter by Roald Dahl (1954).
The room was warm and clean, the curtains drawn, the two table lamps alight—hers and the one by the empty chair opposite. On the sideboard behind her, two tall glasses, soda water, whiskey. Fresh ice cubes in the Thermos bucket.
Mary Maloney was waiting for her husband to come home from work.
Now and again she would glance up at the clock, but without anxiety, merely to please herself with the thought that each minute gone by made it nearer the time when he would come. There was a slow smiling air about her, and about everything she did. The drop of a head as she bent over her sewing was curiously tranquil. Her skin—for this was her sixth month with child—had acquired a wonderful translucent quality, the mouth was soft, and the eyes, with their new placid look, seemed larger darker than before. When the clock said ten minutes to five, she began to listen, and a few moments later, punctually as always, she heard the tires on the gravel outside, and the car door slamming, the footsteps passing the window, the key turning in the lock. She laid aside her sewing, stood up, and went forward to kiss him as he came in.
The first paragraph describes the environment. The second paragraph mentions the main character. Things get moving at the end of the third paragraph.
A common way to make your plot exciting is to end a paragraph on an ambiguous sentence, and then in the next paragraph decide what to do by asking the question, What would completely surprise either the main character or the reader?
Perhaps your main character walks into a hotel lobby and the elevator dings. What happens next? Ask yourself what the main character couldn't possibly expect. Maybe the elevator doors open and out walks their grandmother, the President, or perhaps their doppelganger. Or maybe the doors don't open at all, and the elevator explodes. There are many ways the story can go at a juncture like this.
Read The Story of an Hour, written by Kate Chopin. If you're in a group or class, read it together with the people around you, pausing to discuss each section as indicated in the text. By the end of it, you should see one way of using time and transitions to add suspense.
Read 2BR02B, written by Kurt Vonnegut. After you finish, take a look at the last quarter of the story. There are several surprising plot twists and several places where the author could easily have taken the story in a different direction.
Foreshadowing is placing tidbits of information early in the story that help the reader anticipate the direction the story might go.
Here are several famous examples.
In Romeo and Juliet, before Romeo goes to the party he says, "I fear too early, for my mind misgives some consequence yet hanging in the stars shall bitterly begin his fearful date..." The play has a tragic ending.
Agatha Cristie titled one of her books, "Murder on the Orient Express". The reader is already anticipating murder when they open the front cover.
Near the beginning of Charlotte's Web, the rat finds a rotten egg. The goose tells him, "Be careful—a rotten egg can be a regular stink bomb!" Later in the book, it is used as one.
Foreshadowing can be direct, where the author gives some general information but waits until later to explain the details. Here are some common types of direct foreshadowing.
A bad dream.
A fortune or prophecy.
Thunder, rain, or any kind of bad weather.
A vague sentence fragment, such as "... not knowing what had happened at home".
Foreshadowing can be indirect, as well. Here are a few ideas of how.
The Indiana Jones movies open with the main character trying to attain a valuable artifact and failing, setting up his eventual success at the end of the movie.
The principle of Chekhov's gun states that if you're going to mention the gun above the fireplace when describing the living room, someone should fire that gun later on.
A song could be playing on the radio, and the lyrics could allude to future action.
Two common ways to jump forward or backward in time are flashbacks and dream sequences.
Perhaps the main character is about to give a speech to Congress, and they're nervous about talking in front of a national audience. Why not have a flashback to the day they transferred to a new high school, and they had to introduce themselves to their new classmates? They might recall the advice their teacher gave them, which will serve them well in the present situation, too.
Perhaps the main character is camping near a ruined castle that they're going to explore the following day. Why not have a dream sequence where they dream about walking into the dark basement only to find a sleeping bear, before they wake up drenched in sweat? The next day, when they actually investigate the ruins, they might scream after hearing some animal sounds, only to find out that it was only a few mice.
If you're making a jump through time, it's nice to show the reader that something has changed. One common way of doing this is with a section break. There are various ways of writing them, and here's a popular style.
* * *
The above example section break is three stars on their own line, centered, with a space between each star. Older books might use fancy symbols (e.g., ⁂ or ♦). Some authors prefer to add an extra blank line without any symbols. All of these are effective, as long as the reader can clearly see where a section break occurs.
Here's an example from The Great Gatsby by F. Scott Fitzgerald.
In addition to all these I can remember that Faustina O’Brien came there at least once and the Baedeker girls and young Brewer, who had his nose shot off in the war, and Mr. Albrucksburger and Miss Haag, his fiancée, and Ardita Fitz-Peters and Mr. P. Jewett, once head of the American Legion, and Miss Claudia Hip, with a man reputed to be her chauffeur, and a prince of something, whom we called Duke, and whose name, if I ever knew it, I have forgotten.
All these people came to Gatsby’s house in the summer.
† † †
At nine o’clock, one morning late in July, Gatsby’s gorgeous car lurched up the rocky drive to my door and gave out a burst of melody from its three-noted horn.
Dahl, R. (1953). Lamb to the Slaughter. Harper's Magazine.
Egan, J. (n.d.). ENG134 – Literary Genres. The American Women's College. Retrieved 2024.
Ehlers, A. (2021). 7 Reasons Why ‘What If?’ Is The Most Important Question You Can Ask As A Writer. Writers Write.
Farrington, M. (n.d.) Teaching Texts and Forms [MOOC]. Coursera. Retrieved 2024.
Fitzgerald, F. S. (1925). The Great Gatsby. Scribner.
Potter, B. (1902). The Tale of Peter Rabbit.
Vonnegut, K. (1962). 2BR02B. If: Worlds of Science Fiction, Vol. 11, No. 6.