Tip 1: You realize why it becomes difficult after 6 months
I think we should first discuss an important topic: Falling in love. What is it? The first six to nine months of a relationship you benefit from a hormone storm in his body.
When a man meets you and he falls in love ... then his whole world is turned upside down.
He begins to feel all kinds of things that he has never felt before. Because every crush falls in love with something new.
He falls in love with you to his ears. And can do nothing but think of you. That sounds nice.
But when you look at what happens under the hood, you see that the car runs on a special type of fuel. And after six to nine months the tank is empty ...and the love car slowly comes to a halt.
Falling in love is the result of a collection of hormones and neurotransmitters
The chemical component of loveThese ensure that he becomes so obsessed with you that he cannot focus on anything else.
It also means that he can no longer think clearly, and sometimes makes decisions that he regrets afterwards.
But above all, he idealizes you:
You can't do anything wrong with him. He literally becomes addicted to you. As a result, he can no longer clearly evaluate how you are. And after six months, that suddenly worked out. That is a crucial moment:
Does he still like you when his brain tells him it's time for someone else? Is he willing to give up his freedom and single-shelf the moment he starts to see more clearly who you are and how you are put together?
If you have experienced men leaving you at this point: do not fear
It's not strange when men leave you at this point. And it doesn't have to mean that you were a bad partner, or that something is wrong with you.
It is purely due to hormones and neurotransmitters that men stay longer with someone who they actually think does not suit them. It is made very difficult for them to leave by their own bodies.
And if they still " disappear " from your life, that is of course painful.
But better late than never. Wouldn't it be horrible if you were to marry a man who would not go 100% for you?
Tip 2: Gain new experiences
Do you know what is addictive? Gaining new experiences.
It is so strong that after returning home, backpackers often have difficulty getting used to a slow life :
If you visit a new country every week, naturally bivouacing in the Netherlands will become a bit boring. The same people every time, and just back to work ...
That, of course, is nothing compared to an ongoing adventure.
But that does not mean that you cannot give him the "backpackers experience" when he enters into a relationship with you.
Go on an adventure together
That's why I suggest you take him on an adventure. For example to:
Your family. But his too.
Take a city trip together.
Or go on a longer trip or vacation.
Do workshops. From cooking to theater, everything is allowed.
Go to new restaurants or try other new things.
If you take the initiative, you become a source of adventure for him. And you have just learned that adventure is addictive.
Tip: check this and this list with more fun ideas and activities to do with him.
And what the result is?
for the tensionHe finds it exciting to be close to you.
“But Tim, I don't want to make him addicted to adventure. I want him to love me for who I am. "
I understand that. But do you think a man wants a relationship with a woman who is only sitting on the couch?
No of course not.
And I think you would prefer a man who goes out and about, and who has more to offer than a regular evening watching Idols once a week.
So if you want to date such a man, it is important to become multidimensional yourself.
Not only in the experiences that you have together, but also which sides you show of your personality:
Tip 3: Constantly show new sides of yourself
Different elements of your personality emerge in different situations.
You are probably a lot more polite with your parents than in the pub.
And at school or at work you are probably very businesslike. Unless you are a teacher or boss. Then you are probably pretty strict from time to time.
How to give him the tasting experience of your personality
If you are with him, you don't always have to be the same woman.
If you do new things, then this problem is largely solved. Because you are always in new situations and trying new things, new aspects of your personality are always emphasized.
But of course it can always be more and better.
That is why you should be aware of the emotional spectrum that you show him.
Men are much less aware of this than women. So as long as you don't go very extreme - borderline -like - you'll be fine.
How to show multiple sides of your personality
frustration-fall-in-love-menSo I don't mean that you throw stuff with you one moment and beg him the next if he might want to take you to the bedroom.
I mean that when you say what you think, you make him feel the emotional charge.
So in the bedroom you are sexy, when you talk to him about work you are strict. If he needs it you are sweet, or a little cold if you see that he needs distance.
If you combine that emotional diversity with where and when you tune in to him, you know that you are doing well.
It doesn't have to fall from the sky. It is the intention that you do it in a way that is an extension of your life.