I gathered a lot of this information as a way to document what was helpful (and harmful) for me, and it would have been a useful resource to myself when I began my journey to motherhood. With that in mind, where some are now may be much different from where I was then. But I believe knowledge is power and hope that others can discern in this webpage anything that might be relevant to them. 

 My main upshot is that small and simple practices early on in the pre-conception and/or newborn stages of babies can have great impacts on the level of stress associated with motherhood (and the child's growing up).

Below I detail some practices that I discovered and value for improving the health outcomes of my babies and my comfort in pregnancy. I find the prospect of influencing the creation of bodies empowering, and these are some ways I feel I can impact this process for the better. 

If I were trying to conceive, I would take the following steps: 

1. CLEANSE 

Order Fertility Cleanse from Natural Fertility and perform this cleanse starting on the 4th day of my next cycle (I do NOT try to conceive during this cycle--trying to fertilize an egg after toxins have passed during this entire cycle optimize the egg's condition). I love how I feel from this and sensing built-up toxins/excess hormones/stressors leaving me. (Consider the Male Fertility Cleanse as well). (A cleanse is to support an overloaded liver in eliminating toxins; I like Dr. Maren's explanation of the problem of and solution to environmental toxins). I also wouldn't worry one second about "losing" a month in trying to conceive--this is well worth the 30-days and makes up for lost time through increasing prospects of pregnancy and the baby's long-term health in my opinion. That said, if my past year hasn't been stressful, and I've lived and eaten cleanly (avoided toxins and had mostly organic food), then I would be open to skipping this step. 

2. NOURISH 

Nourish egg health (starting the month after the Fertility Cleanse) via some daily supplements: 

[1] choline/inositol supplement (for fetal brain/spinal chord/memory function), 

[2] magnesium (to reduce stress levels on myself and eggs; it seems to help with metabolism and thyroid function), 

[3] CoQ10 Ubiquinol--I get this from Trader Joe's for $19.99 (to combat oxidative stress on eggs), 

[4] Omega 3 supplement--I just get it from Trader Joe's for $9.99 (to improve egg quality), 

[5] Vitamin D--from Trader Joe's for like $6 bucks (I tend to be low in this; it's useful for optimal pregnancy outcomes and bone health) 

[6] Probiotic--The $10 version from Trader Joe's is good enough for me, but any version with Lactobacillus, Bifidobacterium, and Bacillus would probably work (to combat bad bacteria and create good strains in reproductive regions, though some research suggests gut health is better in people who do not take probiotics--I'd be open either option being right for me.)

[7] Consider using Resveratrol occasionally--I haven't ever used this but recently learned about its antioxidative and anti-aging effects on eggs. It's also found in grapes--that may be a better way to tap into this resource.  

[8] Always take a prenatal vitamin. Rainbow Light has been a convenient choice for me. 

3. BALANCE 

If my cycles are not predictable or I feel out of balance, I consider strategic supplementation with herbs (also after the fertility cleanse). Balancing my cycles improves my chances of conceiving while improving my mental clarity and energy levels. A convenient way to balance is through the Fertilicare program. If I don't conceive during the cycle with Fertilicare, I consider it a recalibrating cycle, and then keep many of the herbs in Fertilicare out of the subsequent cycle, because some of its herbs may help with uterine contractions for menstruation--what I don't want when trying to conceive (but very useful for getting cycles/hormones back on track). So, below are herbs I would feel okay to use in cycles where I'm trying to conceive (after using all the herbs in Fertilicare to reboot my cycles/hormonal balance if needed). 

Follicular phase (days 5-14): 

Vitex (helps regulate estrogen and stimulate ovulation), 

Dong Quai (angelica sinensis is antioxidative and anti-inflammatory for female reproductive system) [I take just one capsule though bottles suggest a serving is two]

Rhemania (supports FSH and release of a healthy egg), 

Luteal phase (day 15-28 [or up until menstruation/positive pregnancy test])

Vitex (helps moderate length of luteal phase to improve chances of sustaining zygote)

Maca (for helping with hormonal levels and antioxidative effects)

This scripture inspires my strategic use of herbs: "and the herb, . . . all things which come of the earth, in the season thereof, are made for the benefit and the use of man;  . . . yea for food and raiment, . . . to strengthen the body and to enliven the soul. (Doctrine & Covenants 59:17-20). 

To that end, when pregnancy is achieved, use of these herbs should stop. 

4. EAT 

I'd eat intentionally with the goal of preparing a nourishing environment to grow a baby. This study outlines the need for lots of fruits and vegetables, high quality grains, fats, and protein and minimization of sugar and simple carbs. The Neurological Health Foundation also outlines optimal eating for pre-conception and pregnancy based on research studying pregnancy outcomes.  

The goal behind all these things is to prepare my body as an environment where a baby could grow--a low-stressed, relaxed, and healthy home. Though some of this may seem overwhelming, for me they ultimately reduce stressors on my body. I also love proactively creating the baby's first environment/home on earth. These are some ways I feel empowered to influence the creation of new life. 

I recommend reading Making Babies by Sami David and Jill Blakeway for the way it prepares women to optimize the health of their eggs. It is pretty consistent with my experience but backed by a doctor's perspective. It is a better resource than I am because it addresses different approaches to egg health and fertility that are appropriate for a variety of body types. 

The Neurological Health Foundation has great pamphlets and recipes for women preparing to concieve and during pregnancy that inform their food choices and potential toxin exposure. It seems to be backed by great research. 

https://neurologicalhealth.org

It Starts with the Egg by Rebecca Fett also seems like an important read for optimizing egg health. 

Dirty Genes by Ben Lynch addresses epigenetics and how pregnant woman can control lifestyle factors to improve genetic outcomes for their children and "clean" genes for themselves. 

No matter the genetic predisposition of babies, establishing healthy sleep habits can build great resiliency in (and a more joyful relationship with) babies. So if no special effort is made to improve egg health before conception, I still take heart. Healthy sleep can do wonders for babies and mothers! When I cared for my first newborn, I thought he would just sleep, and I was in for a rocky three years. I learned on my second baby that they can sleep a lot if given the right conditions at the right time. 

For the first three months of my babies' lives, I plan to pretty much never leave the house for more than 45 minutes at a time. That way, I am sure to be present at the baby's transition from sleep, to eating, playtime, and sleep again. (They can't stay awake for more than about 45 OR 90 minutes at a time. Putting them in bed when they are sleepy but still awake is so important for building sleep independence). I reference Polly Moore's book when this is relevant. I also value Happiest Baby on the Block (the movie was good enough for me). (This video from an Oprah show is also interesting for understanding newborn cries.) 

Strategic swaddling is also critical for my children's self-soothing. Some swaddles are designed to improve self-soothing. I haven't tried them, but I'd be open to giving them a go. I learned this from one of my labor and delivery nurses, and it works great with my Aden and Anais blankets. It allows babies to keep their hands near their faces while preventing them from startling themselves awake. After 3-4 months, I like transitioning them to the Baby Merlin Magic Sleepsuit. 

My lifestyle before and during my first pregnancy was way different from my others. My first baby also had a pretty unstable first three years with frequent moving for grad school and internships (though love and attention from two adoring novice parents was constant). I contrast my lifestyle during those years with those of my other children because my oldest child's immunity is very different from my others and caring for him was much more stressful. His health from 0-3 directly impacted my ability to pursue professional goals and enjoy leisure time. The love for him and thrill of being a mother carried me through those years, but had I made some doable changes years earlier, I suspect he could have been spared the viruses he endured every month for three years, and I could have slept through the night much sooner and worked predictable hours. 

Things I did while preparing to conceive my first baby and throughout that pregnancy included a vegan diet and high-stress job. I wish I would have had the high-protein, low-sugar diet outlined later and had learned to manage my stress better with things like yoga or changing my commute or job. 

In my first baby's infancy, I didn't follow any sleep schedule and I nursed him to sleep and anytime he wanted in the day or night. I swaddled him with arms pinned to his side, which he hated, so when he was only a few weeks old, I stopped swaddling him completely. He did not sleep enough during his first three years of life because I didn't provide a consistent environment or time in which he could rest. He relied completely on me or driving in the car to get to sleep. And I never slept through the night for about three years. We co-slept to make nights bearable for me. Some moms can nurture like this, and I thought it was just fine at the time. But now I see how different a baby's disposition, health, and my well-being can be if I had maintained the integrity of his sleep schedule (following guidance from Healthy Sleep Habits, Happy Child--a must have! Babies' sleep needs change quickly, so this walks me through what to expect each month). I also wish I had swaddled more effectively with a self-soothing position. I wish I would have provided a darker room in which he could sleep, used a noise machine, and followed a wake--eat--play--lay down pattern as a newborn in accordance with their circadian rhythm.  At about 3-4 months old, I wish I would have used a Baby Merlin Magic Sleepsuit while transitioning from the swaddle. 

Rearing him was more stressful during those years than it was for my subsequent babies at those ages, but he turned out wonderful despite my inadequacies! I love kids' resilience, and perhaps he is uniquely sensitive because of my approach to motherhood at the time. I still wish I would have taken steps to improve his health and sleep, but hope for a happy life is still certain amid imperfect execution of establishing healthy habits early. 

Fertility was an issue for me, and eventually I realized how toxic of an environment my body was. I didn't know it at the time, but as I tried some changes below, I could finally sense that I could control the stress and toxins in my body with lifestyle choices. I could also influence the balance of my hormones, which impacted my mental clarity, weight, energy, and of course fertility. 

I read "Taking Charge of Your Fertility," which was an excellent source for helping me identify when I was truly fertile and target problems in the length of my luteal phase. With this information, I was empowered to eat a certain way during different times of my cycle to support the estrogenic forces in the follicular phase and the need for progesterone during the luteal phase of the cycle. (For example, I wasn't afraid of peanuts and soy products when estrogen was the dominant hormone, but after ovulation, I avoided estrogenic foods and ate foods that help remove phytoestrogens like broccoli, cauliflower, greens, and the other excellent foods for fertility below).

When my cycles were irregular/nonexistent, my doctor prescribed a regime with progesterone and clomid. This worked, but had awful side effects. If kickstarting my cycles ever became a problem again, I would turn to something like this FertiliCare program, using herbs strategically in an intended cycle. I used something like this prior to one pregnancy and successfully regulated my cycles in addition to feeling balanced and energized.

Below I discuss a diet that I found facilitated hormonal balance and fertility before conceiving. This worked well for my body type and needs. The Making Babies Book can help others discern if what I found important would be important to them. Themes of the diet include organic foods, healthy fats, whole foods, no grains (unless sprouted), no refined foods, and absolutely no sugar. It also involves avoiding plastic (avoid using plastic utensils, cups, and Tupperware).

 Section (a) lists what I’d expect to eat for meals and snacks, (b) discusses phytic acid and grains, (c) presents some foods that affect hormones, and (d) provides a suggested grocery list.

Breakfast: organic cage-free eggs, fruit

Snack: nuts (soaked), fruit

Lunch: salad, veggies, avocado, beans, olives, pasture-raised cheese

Snack: green smoothie (1 cup orange juice or almond milk, or combo of the two, 2 big handfuls of greens, 1-2 cups combination of frozen mango and/or berries)

Dinner: grass-fed beef, tomato, salad, fermented food like sauerkraut

Alternate snack or dessert: brownies made of walnuts, unsweetened coconut, honey or dates, cocoa powder, eggs, salt, butter and/or coconut oil, and baking soda

Flavor any of the above with cold-pressed olive oil, honey, vinegar, salt, pepper, or sugar-free and MSG-free seasoning

Phytic acid naturally occurs in grains, beans, and nuts as a pesticide (I believe), but it also prevents absorption of vitamins and minerals when one consumes it. But it can be minimized from these foods by soaking. For example, I soak dried beans in filtered water for 24 hours before rinsing and then cooking. I soak walnuts and almonds in filtered water and a tablespoon of salt for about 8 hours; then I rinse, and store the nuts in the fridge or freezer. I could soak grains, but I find it cumbersome, so I simply avoid eating grains at all because of the phytic acid present. I often eat canned organic beans instead of cooking my own beans, and I just rinse them well in a vinegar-water solution spray in a colander. Sprouted grain flours are available, and when I do eat grains I usually limit them to Ezekiel Bread or food I make myself with One Degree flour or oats. 

Certain foods are dominant in estrogen and progesterone. So I minimized eating foods with estrogen altogether (because phytoestrogens were excessive for me but progesterone was typically harder to get), and progesterone is super important for supporting a healthy luteal phase, which was a weakness for me. But if I did eat estrogenic foods, I only ate them in the follicular phase and never in the luteal phase.  Below are some of my takeaways:

 I avoided estrogenic foods like the following (especially in the luteal phase, but I’d possibly consume some in the follicular phase):

• Soybean oil

• Garbanzo beans 

• Peanuts

• Flax seeds

• Peas (I think)

• Anything inorganic

• Unsoaked grains

• Sugar (always avoided)

• (probably more, but these are the ones I remember)

I’d try to never eat the following:

• No grains (If I did have grains, I made sure they were soaked/sprouted to remove phytic acid) 

• No sugar

• No MSG

• No artificial sweeteners

• No corn syrup

I’d consume progesterone rich foods:

• Organic broccoli

• Organic beef

• Organic chicken

• Avocado

• Sauerkraut

• Other fermented foods

• Dark leafy greens

• Soaked almonds

• Eggs

• Bananas

• Potatoes

• Pumpkin

• Watermelon

• Squash

• Molasses

• Grapefruit

• (I’m sure there’s more, but this is what I remembered)

Some foods can be unusually estrogenic if not organic, so below are my standards for when I’d insist on organic and when I was okay to consume regular (generally, foods with thick peels or root vegetables are okay to me if inorganic)

I’d only eat these if organic: 

• apples

• berries

• spinach 

• coconut oil (only unrefined)

• grass-fed cheese 

• grass-fed butter

• grass-fed beef

• pasture-raised chicken

• pear

• grapes

Better if organic:

• Peach

• Pear

• Carrots

• Figs

• Dates

• Cold-pressed virgin olive oil

Okay if not organic: 

• Avocado

• Mango

• Orange

• Olives 

• Watermelon 

To make eating for fertility more likely to happen, I prepared below some shopping lists and where I’ve found the best value in the Salt Lake area. 

Costco shopping list

• Organic dried figs (especially good for husband to eat)

• Organic dried apricots

• Walnuts

• Almonds

• Raw unrefined honey

• Organic super greens

• Organic frozen mango

• Organic frozen berries

• Organic frozen vegetable medley

• Organic unrefined coconut oil 

• Organic grass-fed beef

• Organic chicken (I get the thighs)

• Organic bananas

• Organic canned green beans

• Organic canned black beans

• Organic canned diced tomatoes

• Wild-caught canned salmon

• Canned tuna

• Organic butter

• Organic cage-free eggs

• Olives

Smiths

• Organic coconut flour, flakes, or shreds

• Organic unrefined coconut oil (I’ve heard mixed reviews about this, but I ate a lot of it while trying to conceive, so I’m in the camp that it’s okay and even good). This is also available at Costco

• Organic potatoes

• Organic unsweetened almond milk

• Orange juice

• Organic lentils

• Organic dates (in bulk section)

• Organic apple cider vinegar

• Organic mustard (no sugar added)

• Organic canned peaches

• Organic canned pears

• McCormick rotisserie chicken seasoning (no MSG)

• Organic grass-fed cheese

Other good shopping options are Trader Joe's, Sprouts, Natural Grocers, and Walmart. Also, I use a wide-mouth jar and cut some plastic mesh to fit under the ring, which serves as a strainer when draining water from rinsed nuts, making it convenient to soak and rinse nuts.

I was truly surprised by how wonderful I felt after stopping use of commercial products--It was like my whole body could breathe. My husband thought I went crazy, and it seemed pretty extreme. But it was so simple that it was worth trying for a month to see if I felt a difference--I did. Some of these changes didn’t need to be made forever for me, but I think they made a difference in improving egg health, preparing a healthy non-toxic environment for my babies to develop in, and facilitating mental clarity. 

These were some of my favorite changes in hygiene:

1.     No conventional hygiene products (to avoid toxic chemicals)

2.   Homemade toothpaste composed of coconut oil, baking soda, calcium carbonate, parsley seed oil, and tea tree oil (Recipe by Wellness Mama here, I think this Earthpaste toothpaste would also be good). Some are pretty abrasive, and I don’t love any of the toothpastes I’ve tried—I just know I can’t go back to Crest and Colgate, and I focus on simple products free of SLS, glycerin, stevia, and artificial colorings. 

3.     Basic soap (Ivory is okay to me [but not Irish Soap, Dove, etc.]), but the best was a hemp soap I got from a natural foods store). Hemp helps hormonal balance. I also enjoy Dr. Bronner’s Hemp Citrus or Baby Mild Pure Castille with a foaming pump if I can’t find a bar I like. I use this for hands and body.  

4.  Sometimes I consider following up soap with a baking soda exfoliate in the shower (unless high quality soap like the hemp is used, then I do baking soda exfoliate before using soap). This is basically rubbing baking soda on myself and rinsing—I know it’s odd, but it seems to serve as a natural deep cleanser to help remove toxins from low-quality soap. 

5.     I used basic soap on my hair (by basic I mean one with maybe coconut oil and olive oil with some lye--really simple). Hopefully a more desirable replacement exists, because this isn’t  the best for my hair. I continue to experiment around. Using vinegar as a conditioner is effective, but not fun. I did this just temporarily when I was really motivated to be completely natural. 

6.     I use a natural deodorant, like Schmidt’s at Target. I also loved one I found at a health food store, which contained coconut oil, baking soda, and clary sage (clary sage is an essential oil that helps with hormonal balance I believe).

7.     I don't really use makeup, but as natural makeup as possible helps me minimize stress on the body from toxins. Natural Grocers may have some good options. 

8.     I stopped using hair spray (I found I didn't need it anymore with the use of soap instead of shampoo, and if I did, I used a homemade hairspray with water, aloe vera, and epsom salt)

I think using these supplements finally tipped the scale in my favor when fertility was a hurdle. Here is what I consider using BEFORE CONCEIVING to help with hormonal balance and egg health:

1. Magnesium – All my pregnancy books talk about the importance of magnesium and how hard it is to get. I found EASE Magnesium spray an effective way to obtain it. Its purpose is to help cells do their jobs. I love this, and I prioritize having sufficient magnesium. 

2. Maca – I honestly don’t know too much about this supplement, but it was recommended in a lot of the resources I reviewed, so I took it, and I assume it helped.  

3. Cod Liver Oil – I forgot why this is important specifically, but I need a lot of healthy fats and some of the best fats come from liver. I don’t recommend the source that I used in one pregnancy (Green Pasture Fermented Cod Liver Oil due to likely rancidity). I’ve heard good things about this one. If I don’t do Cod Liver Oil, I try to take some form of DHA. I currently  use Nordic Naturals. 

4. Prenatal vitamin – Almost any should do if it excludes maltodextrin and artificial sweeteners. I’ve used Rainbow Light. 

5. Probiotics – I think this helps digestion and gives my body good bacteria to help keep my future baby and me healthy. I’ve used Hyperbiotics Pro-Moms, Hyperbiotics Pro-15, and Bio-Kult. Right now, I like the probiotic from Trader Joe’s.  

6. Vitex – I did not use this, but I have since learned about it, and it may be beneficial. 

These are supplements I take DURING PREGNANCY. Some above are harmful to take while pregnant. 

1. Prenatal vitamin. I like Rainbow Light and Garden of Life. 

2. DHA—I watch the Vitamin A levels and sources in these, because too much preformed vitamin A hurts a developing baby. (Vitamin A from food sources [e.g. beta-carotene] isn’t harmful at levels above 10.000 IU from what I read, but preformed versions [e.g. retinol]  can be harmful above 10,000 IU a day). Otherwise, DHA during pregnancy seems to be a pretty standard recommendation. Right now I use this Nordic Naturals 690 mg dose. 

3. Probiotic

4. Occasional spirulina—the Utah healthline advises against taking this, given the lack of regulation and potential for contaminated sourcing. So I just take it occasionally if I was low on greens in my diet that day. 

5. Magnesium

6. Dates--this is not a supplement, but I make a point to consume them in my third trimesters of pregnancy for the scientifically proven effect they have on preparing my body for labor. 

While preparing my body for conception, I try to do the following: 

1.     Get 15-30 minutes of sun

2.     Avoid exercise beyond caring for my children and taking them for walks. 

3.     I make a concerted effort to breathe in from my nose instead of my mouth. 

4.     I avoid cold drinks and cold food--they produce phlegm, which throws the body out of balance. So I make sure all food and drink are room temperature or warmer. 

5.     I avoid using and eating from plastic dishes.

6.     I don't eat after 8 pm.

7.     I sleep right when I feel tired, and otherwise ensure I have enough sleep.

8.     I didn’t pick up yoga until I was pregnant in my third trimester with my second baby, but I recommend it. I think there are practices for fertility, but really most yoga seems to support healthy blood flow and strength. I spend at least 30 minutes a day stretching (usually 10-minute flows at three different times during the day). I love MyYogaWorks, but Boho Beautiful on YouTube has also been a go-to free resource for me. Yoga has been critical for optimizing my energy generally, improving flexibility, and supporting recovery from bearing children. 

I regularly read scriptures, pray, and maintain positive relationships with those close to me. This helps me minimize stress and anxiety and maximize clarity and peace of mind. 

I tried these habits after reading tips from Wellness Mama, Nat Kringoudis, and others including Hannah Hepworth. I also read "Taking Charge of Your Fertility," which was an excellent source for helping me identify when I was truly fertile and target problems in the length of my luteal phase. I’ve now come across Hethir Rodriguez’ website, and a lot of her info coheres with my experience. For some more resources on food prep, nutrition, and/or natural hygiene products, Nourished Kitchen and CaiteyJay may be useful. I also occasionally refer to Weston A. Price for a recommended diet for fertility and the organization’s pep talk for addressing infertility. 

I'm passionate about motherhood and the joyful experience it can be! These are some ways I feel I can influence it to be less stressful and a healthier experience for all involved. I hope others find joy in their journeys of motherhood and empowerment to influence their experiences for the better.