Influencer Spotlight Amanda; Bonghitsbigtits

High! My name is Amanda, but most of you may know me by my hilarious social media handle: Bonghitsbigtits.

I'm too close to 30 and I'm a loud and proud Latina! I was born in Miami and raised throughout Miami, New York, and New Jersey. Currently, I happily reside in Michigan as a single mom to the wildest almost 5-year-old boy. Online, I tend to share a lot of my personal life, including cannabis, comedy, (single) motherhood, sobriety, trauma and so much more.

Growing up, my father was in the military and that made it hard to stay in one place, make (and keep) friends, etc. I went to three different high schools in three different states for three separate years. My social anxiety has turned me into a recluse. I get my interactions and socializations through Instagram mostly. Once I became comfortable online, I realized there were so many beautiful connections I had made. That prompted me to keep being myself. I have zero issues having hard discussions, holding people accountable, helping others relate and heal, teaching others and just helping people in general. All the while I'm cracking jokes (laughter is the best medicine), crying, healing, helping, and surviving.

Unfortunately for me, I've suffered. A lot. Yet somehow, I've overcome some of the hardest obstacles life could throw anyone's way: addiction/substance abuse, being a single parent, toxic parents/family, assault, trouble with the law, loss/grief... it hasn't been an easy road. When I was 15, I got addicted to heroin. For 6 grueling years, I was down a hole I never saw myself coming out of alive.

At 21, I got sober for the first time. Being the stubborn asshole that I am, I refused rehab/addiction treatment - I just wanted to do it myself. It took a few tries, some relapse episodes, and a couple of years to really get it down. At 26, I ended up relapsing after 5 years of sobriety. I had recently broken up with my son's father and sent my son to live with my parents 6 hours away in Michigan.

I stayed back in Wisconsin and tried to navigate life and save some money to take care of my son on my own. A year flew by, I got screwed over by my would-have-been landlord and ended up packing my things into a U-Haul and coming to Michigan to live in my parents' basement while once again, trying to get sober.

(story continued here)

Coming back to my parents' home was NOT ideal. Throughout most of my life, my parents have contributed to much of my mental and emotional trauma. That made withdrawal and my depression skyrocket. Having immigrants for parents is not always delicious food and culture - a lot of the time it is toxicity, trauma, and abuse. I feel as though that doesn't get discussed enough so I started speaking on that a lot this past year.

Come to find out, I'm not the only daughter of immigrants who never met their expectations due to wanting to be my own person. I realized I was not alone, and I was shattering the silence most women who share the same familial issues kept. My most noticeable trait is that I talk, and I keep it real. So, the way I continue to break stigmas and heal is by using my voice and allowing others into my world. Sharing the heartbreaks of life with others who experienced similar things is so healing in such a beautiful way.

I've learned to embrace all the negative because speaking on my experiences has helped others. When I realize the impact I made on people, I knew I had found my peace. I found my tribe: people who loved me, supported me, respected me. I was comfortable opening up and sharing my life with others because oftentimes, it was helping others.

That's my favorite part of social media for me - knowing I have made an impact and helped others. Knowing there are other single moms out there who feel hopeless, confused, nervous. Knowing there are other addicts in recovery looking for safe, non-addictive ways to get off substances. Just knowing that I have these awful experiences that I can use in such a beautiful way is what keeps me online and yelling into my phone on the daily.

To sum it all up, I'm here to help others realize that while life can be tragic... it is still possible to survive. I'm so honored to have connected with some of the most beautiful souls thanks to social media. I'm lucky to have the platform I do to be able to continue spreading authenticity, accountability, possibility, and cheerfulness. Come along for the ride, you'll have plenty of laughs, some tears will be shed but, in the end, we're going to be just fine.

Peace and love,

Amanda @bonghitsbigtits

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