Matthew 1:18-23
18Now the birth of Jesus the Messiah took place in this way. When his mother Mary had been engaged to Joseph, but before they lived together, she was found to be with child from the Holy Spirit. 19 Her husband Joseph, being a righteous man and unwilling to expose her to public disgrace, planned to dismiss her quietly. 20 But just when he had resolved to do this, an angel of the Lord appeared to him in a dream and said, “Joseph, son of David, do not be afraid to take Mary as your wife, for the child conceived in her is from the Holy Spirit. 21 She will bear a son, and you are to name him Jesus, for he will save his people from their sins.” 22 All this took place to fulfill what had been spoken by the Lord through the prophet: 23 “Look, the virgin shall conceive and bear a son, and they shall name him Emmanuel,”
Romans 5:1-5
Therefore, since we are justified by faith, we have peace with God through our Lord Jesus Christ, 2 through whom we have obtained access to this grace in which we stand; and we boast in our hope of sharing the glory of God. 3And not only that, but we also boast in our sufferings, knowing that suffering produces endurance, 4 and endurance produces
character, and character produces hope, 5 and hope does not disappoint us, because God’s love has been poured into our hearts through the Holy Spirit that has been given to us.
As we continue our Advent theme of HOPE, we look to Joseph’s part in the nativity story. He is often overlooked and pushed to the side but paying attention to how he dealt with unexpected and at least initially disturbing news is helpful. Upon hearing this shocking news, he immediately acts and seeks to resolve the situation as a man of faith would do. Now, Joseph is well aware of the Deuteronomic code which outlines all the purity laws in Deuteronomy, including that if any woman, even while engaged, is accused of adultery she would be tried, along with her fiancée and both would likely be stoned to death.
Joseph's solution is to “dismiss her quietly”. That's to protect and save Mary, and most probably himself. And, as much as we want to or do judge Joseph, we recognize the ‘problem solving’ that Joseph enacts. And we're no different. We recognize that problem solving is helpful, especially when we're up against it; when we're blindsided by something that's difficult, embarrassing or even inexplicable. We, too, create a strategy and then act and resolve the problem.
Sometimes the solution resolves whatever difficult or painful thing has happened, but more often than not, life's unexpected, difficult surprises are things we just have to learn how to endure. Sometimes they're short-lived. Sometimes they're long-standing. Sometimes we are able to easily pivot. Sometimes there are things we need to learn how to adjust to and that takes time and courage and often more resources than we can muster on our own. If we pull apart and slow down this narrative a little more, we might actually even be able to relate to Joseph a little better. Verses 18-20 don't reveal the time frame and what was really going on inside Joseph's head emotionally and mentally and spiritually; the upheaval that was going on in him and Mary as well.
So, before we rush to the good news in this story and hear the good news from the angel to Joseph in a dream, let's imagine how we would cope in a difficult situation. There's always some sort of shock and/or deep disappointment, a ringing of hands, worrying, sleepless nights, complaining to at least one or more trusted people, perhaps seeking advice from experts and, of course, researching the topic ad nauseam on the internet. Or maybe just becoming catatonic, retreating from loved ones while we sort through our own emotions. We assess our options and list the pros and cons of what to do. These actions and activities can go on for a short or a prolonged period of time, depending on what kind of news we're dealing with. But then, when we're ready, and we've done all of our research, then we're ready to execute the plan and share that with others.
Well, in this story, I’m not so sure. I think there's something missing from Matthew's telling of this story. Although, we know, Matthew's goal is always to talk about the fulfillment of the scriptures through Jesus’ carrying out the scripture and the law. Aha! That's the piece that's missing in the discussion! What’s missing is the fleshing out of the righteousness of Joseph. So who is he? He's a faithful Jew. He puts his whole trust in God. He also knows all of Deuteronomy, especially Chapter Six, which Jews still call the ‘Shema’. And some of you may know to this day Orthodox Jews attach the Shema on their arms, called phylacteries, inside the foreheads, inside their hats, around their waist and the Shema is: “Love the Lord God with all your soul, with all your spirit, with all your might.”
And that's what Joseph did. He loved the Lord God with all of his soul and all of his might. And that's what helped him get through. It also means that because of that Joseph had hope. He didn't wring his hands too long. He didn't worry and spend time researching and strategizing. He put his hope and his trust in God. He put his hope in God and God's promises, even though he couldn't see yet what was to happen. Even facing, probably the worst thing that happened in his life thus far, he still stood firmly in God's care, even in the midst of a surprise, suffering and the unknown. He drew strength from God, because he knew the strength came not from his own strategy and his intellect, but from God. And God's promises and what it meant for him and Mary is for us too. We too can endure disappointment and upset and derailments, because we, too, can stand firm in God's promises even when we don't yet see or hear the outcome. We can still receive the strength that comes from enduring difficulty and the character that comes from enduring which is what Paul is proclaiming in Romans. The strength, the character, the endurance that we get? all those things happen, not because of our minds and our research, but through God’s grace. We receive a hope and a trust that God will find a way where there seems to be none. God will show a path in the midst of a jungle. God will show us a vision, even in the darkest of the night. God will bring light in the deepest and the darkest night sky, that only God’s light can overcome. That light is Emmanuel, God with us.
I was with some very dear friends, recently, and I hadn't seen them in a while. In fact, I hadn't seen them since their son took his own life at the age of 23. I did his service. I had him in youth group many, many, many years ago. And, in the aftermath of their loss, they sought therapy. They sought to deal and cope with their heartbreak as best they could. But when they sought out a resource, one counselor warned them that 50 percent of marriages end when a child takes their own life. How is that helpful??? That doesn’t offer hope!
So, I asked them recently, “How are you guys doing?” They said, “Well, you were right. It is day by day and breath by breath. But you know what? Because of our faith and because of our church, our marriage is not weak. It is stronger than ever, because they stood in the grace and the hope promised to them by God. This hope and this promise comes to us in a small child who comes not only to take away the sins of the world, but to salve our wounds and give us the strength to stand and be strong in the midst of our suffering, and our fears, and our anxieties, and our catastrophizing about the future, and our guilt about the past. All that can be overcome, but only if we have the courage to stand like Joseph did and wait for God to show up. Emmanuel, God with us. Thanks be to God. Amen.