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“2019, Charleston, IL. Before: Bike”
Photo by Kim Looby
The picture with the bike above was in 2019. I spent 6 months training for a 154 mile bike ride. I rode 200 miles a week and did 3 hours of weight training every week. What I don't know yet at the time of this photo is that I’ll find out I have a hole in my lung and experience my first paralysis episode 3 months after this picture was taken.
The picture with the bike above was in 2019. I spent 6 months training for a 154 mile bike ride. I rode 200 miles a week and did 3 hours of weight training every week. What I don't know yet at the time of this photo is that I’ll find out I have a hole in my lung and experience my first paralysis episode 3 months after this picture was taken.
Now I often have to walk with a cane or I don't walk at all. I have not ridden my bike since 2019 after a decade of riding. There are many days where I can’t leave my apartment. I temporarily lose functioning in one of my legs and have to drag it behind me, or my hips are in so much pain that every step is painful and I will pay for this over the next 24-48 hours. I should not be walking when I’m like this but sometimes I choose my mental health over my physical health.
Now I often have to walk with a cane or I don't walk at all. I have not ridden my bike since 2019 after a decade of riding. There are many days where I can’t leave my apartment. I temporarily lose functioning in one of my legs and have to drag it behind me, or my hips are in so much pain that every step is painful and I will pay for this over the next 24-48 hours. I should not be walking when I’m like this but sometimes I choose my mental health over my physical health.
2022, Arthur, IL. After: Cain”
Photo by Kim Looby
"Possibilities Awakening"
Photo by Javonne Green
As a new dawn arises, I have the choice to lay dormant or cultivate life….
As a new dawn arises, I have the choice to lay dormant or cultivate life….
"There Go I"
Photo by Javonne Green
One thought, one step, one decision from throwing it all away……
One thought, one step, one decision from throwing it all away……
“The long and winding trails”
Photo by Debra Bunker
At a campus celebration for University Employees, a free lunch was offered. All I saw was that the end of the line was way down a set of stairs and that it was winding here and there till you got to the food line which was several hundred feet away. Having a walking disability that curtails the ability to maneuver the stairs to get in line, plus the pain involved in simply standing in lines made me not even participate as I could not climb the stairs, stand in the line and walk that far at that time.
At a campus celebration for University Employees, a free lunch was offered. All I saw was that the end of the line was way down a set of stairs and that it was winding here and there till you got to the food line which was several hundred feet away. Having a walking disability that curtails the ability to maneuver the stairs to get in line, plus the pain involved in simply standing in lines made me not even participate as I could not climb the stairs, stand in the line and walk that far at that time.
These succulents are healthy and happy, they have chutes that generally bloom once each year. I didn't notice them right away, as they were tucked in by other plants and I only noticed their blooms. I was happily surprised to see succulents in Alaska, something I realized I wasn't expecting. My reprieve from society is noticing the tiny details in nature. This moment felt nice.
These succulents are healthy and happy, they have chutes that generally bloom once each year. I didn't notice them right away, as they were tucked in by other plants and I only noticed their blooms. I was happily surprised to see succulents in Alaska, something I realized I wasn't expecting. My reprieve from society is noticing the tiny details in nature. This moment felt nice.
"Just like home"
Photo by Sydney Gallup
"Pollution"
Photo by Chase Rankin
It’s easy to ruminate on the negative aspects of my disability. These negative thoughts are pollutants that quickly turn the brain into an inhospitable biohazard.
It’s easy to ruminate on the negative aspects of my disability. These negative thoughts are pollutants that quickly turn the brain into an inhospitable biohazard.
"New Rules"
Photo by Shai Nickerson
Fibromyalgia makes rest essential, and in these slow moments, I find peace.
Fibromyalgia makes rest essential, and in these slow moments, I find peace.
"Shaky"
Photo by Sydney Gallup
Sometimes it's easy to look down and avoid eye contact, but it's also something I wish I didn't have to do. Being around people can be nice and I love speaking up about important issues, so social anxiety makes that all more challenging. I experience nausea, I may cry, I shake, my back goes numb, and my heart rate is high. My feet are a view that I love and hate. The edited double layered photo hopefully creates the sensation I feel when I'm anxious.
Sometimes it's easy to look down and avoid eye contact, but it's also something I wish I didn't have to do. Being around people can be nice and I love speaking up about important issues, so social anxiety makes that all more challenging. I experience nausea, I may cry, I shake, my back goes numb, and my heart rate is high. My feet are a view that I love and hate. The edited double layered photo hopefully creates the sensation I feel when I'm anxious.
"Fallen Little AirPod”
Photo by Mariama Abubakri
Oh to be a fallen little AirPod caught by a bed of leaves. Saved from the abysmal darkness just below.
Oh to be a fallen little AirPod caught by a bed of leaves. Saved from the abysmal darkness just below.
To be supported by so many yet always feeling so close to the edge.
To be supported by so many yet always feeling so close to the edge.
To be a little AirPod…
To be a little AirPod…
"Bright Side"
Photo by Chase Rankin
Despite the hardships of my disability, I try to remind myself of the positives and the beauty that is present in everyday life.
Despite the hardships of my disability, I try to remind myself of the positives and the beauty that is present in everyday life.
“Flight of the Bumblebee”
Photo by Mariama Abubakri
Spinner of my dreams.
Spinner of my dreams.
Study together makes it seem,
Study together makes it seem,
I’m just like everyone else and can just be.
I’m just like everyone else and can just be.
"Natural Mirrors"
Photo by Shai Nickerson
Each ring of the tree tells a story of endurance, each woodpecker hole a battle scar—every day with chronic illness adds to my tale of strength.
Each ring of the tree tells a story of endurance, each woodpecker hole a battle scar—every day with chronic illness adds to my tale of strength.
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