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"I do love myself"
Photo by Sydney Gallup
With therapy and a lot of intentional work, I've learned what helps me manage body dysmorphia and the ADHD symptoms that make maintaining a healthy life hard. Healthy being a balanced diet that isn't restricting and workouts that I enjoy and are not forced.
With therapy and a lot of intentional work, I've learned what helps me manage body dysmorphia and the ADHD symptoms that make maintaining a healthy life hard. Healthy being a balanced diet that isn't restricting and workouts that I enjoy and are not forced.
So when times are tough, maybe I'm more depressed, I know when I'm able to get back on my feet that I'll be OK. When I'm in a low period is what I call it, I remind myself to be patient and gentle. And then when I'm a little more stable, life is a bit easier. I can stick to my routines. I'm ok.
So when times are tough, maybe I'm more depressed, I know when I'm able to get back on my feet that I'll be OK. When I'm in a low period is what I call it, I remind myself to be patient and gentle. And then when I'm a little more stable, life is a bit easier. I can stick to my routines. I'm ok.
All of that to say. It takes a lot of strength to go up and down, deal with managing all of these thoughts, and to feel all of these feelings.
All of that to say. It takes a lot of strength to go up and down, deal with managing all of these thoughts, and to feel all of these feelings.
With food, disordered eating, and ADHD I am not sure I'll ever get to eat without overthinking it. This cupcake will be enjoyed, but it will come with a lasting impact. I'll check my belly later that night to see how it looks. Depending on how I look will determine if I'll then panic about how much I've worked out lately. I might punish myself the rest of the week. If my body looks acceptable, I will tell myself it has to be maintained and I can't have more sweets for a while. I spend a lot of my time thinking about food in a multitude of ways. It's heavy. It's frustrating. This cupcake is frustrating.
With food, disordered eating, and ADHD I am not sure I'll ever get to eat without overthinking it. This cupcake will be enjoyed, but it will come with a lasting impact. I'll check my belly later that night to see how it looks. Depending on how I look will determine if I'll then panic about how much I've worked out lately. I might punish myself the rest of the week. If my body looks acceptable, I will tell myself it has to be maintained and I can't have more sweets for a while. I spend a lot of my time thinking about food in a multitude of ways. It's heavy. It's frustrating. This cupcake is frustrating.
"Neverending"
Photo by Sydney Gallup
“Looking into My Eyes”
Photo by Othelia Lee
Some say I possess a rare insight, Perhaps my dimmed vision reveals hidden sights. Perhaps my other senses, in their earnest quest, unveil the secrets the world forgets.
Some say I possess a rare insight, Perhaps my dimmed vision reveals hidden sights. Perhaps my other senses, in their earnest quest, unveil the secrets the world forgets.
(Painted by Rene Magritte; Photographed at the photo at the Metropolitan Museum of Modern Art in NYC)
(Painted by Rene Magritte; Photographed at the photo at the Metropolitan Museum of Modern Art in NYC)
Representation matters. I’ve been a Star Wars fan for almost 30 years. I went to Hero's Con in Charlotte this summer and brought my wheelchair. I had been having a lot of issues with walking and with breathing, so I knew I may need it after a long day of walking and standing. There was another person dressed as a Jedi and in a wheelchair. I asked to take a picture together, because even adults need to see people like them.
Representation matters. I’ve been a Star Wars fan for almost 30 years. I went to Hero's Con in Charlotte this summer and brought my wheelchair. I had been having a lot of issues with walking and with breathing, so I knew I may need it after a long day of walking and standing. There was another person dressed as a Jedi and in a wheelchair. I asked to take a picture together, because even adults need to see people like them.
"Charlotte, NC 2024 “Jedis can be disabled too.”
Photo by Kim Looby
“Daily Necessities”
Photo by Debra Bunker
Most people think of food and drink when they are thinking of their daily necessities. When I am having my bad days, I am never far from a heating pad or an ice pack to apply to my back for relief. I need added lumbar support and usually need to have my disability placard to get a space to park close to where I work. That is not always easy as there are not enough spaces for the number of people who require disability parking spots on campus.
Most people think of food and drink when they are thinking of their daily necessities. When I am having my bad days, I am never far from a heating pad or an ice pack to apply to my back for relief. I need added lumbar support and usually need to have my disability placard to get a space to park close to where I work. That is not always easy as there are not enough spaces for the number of people who require disability parking spots on campus.
My work is all in my hands. I use them daily to complete my data entry for my job. I am having difficulty due to trigger fingers on both hands. My left thumb has started to pain me, my left ring finger locks in place and sometimes I have to manually unlock it. I have numbness and tingling in my left hand that runs from my thumb to my pinky finger. I have to let my arm relax at my side to stop the sensations. I need carpal tunnel surgery on the left side along with the trigger finger release. I don't know what is required for the thumb yet. My right side has a trigger pinky only. My carpal tunnel on my right side was done last year and is almost pain-free. Using my hands to push anything causes me pain. First thing in the mornings are the worse, when the stiffness is significant and the hands just don't want to move. Driving can cause my left hand to go numb and so I have to drive with the right hand only.
My work is all in my hands. I use them daily to complete my data entry for my job. I am having difficulty due to trigger fingers on both hands. My left thumb has started to pain me, my left ring finger locks in place and sometimes I have to manually unlock it. I have numbness and tingling in my left hand that runs from my thumb to my pinky finger. I have to let my arm relax at my side to stop the sensations. I need carpal tunnel surgery on the left side along with the trigger finger release. I don't know what is required for the thumb yet. My right side has a trigger pinky only. My carpal tunnel on my right side was done last year and is almost pain-free. Using my hands to push anything causes me pain. First thing in the mornings are the worse, when the stiffness is significant and the hands just don't want to move. Driving can cause my left hand to go numb and so I have to drive with the right hand only.
I knit and crochet and that is painful especially since the fingers are then clenched closed as I grab and hold the yarn and needles. After a few minutes I must break and give my hands a chance to return to normal sensation with no pain and no numbness and tingling. It makes my projects take much longer.
I knit and crochet and that is painful especially since the fingers are then clenched closed as I grab and hold the yarn and needles. After a few minutes I must break and give my hands a chance to return to normal sensation with no pain and no numbness and tingling. It makes my projects take much longer.
I can no longer grab onto anything heavy with one hand. Two hands are required and even then there are times that it is difficult. I am constantly dropping things as the numbness and/or pain causes me to lose my grip on things quite easily.
I can no longer grab onto anything heavy with one hand. Two hands are required and even then there are times that it is difficult. I am constantly dropping things as the numbness and/or pain causes me to lose my grip on things quite easily.
I no longer am the first to offer a handshake when meeting someone as I have been hurt by the bone-crushing grip that some people like to give with their "firm" handshakes. It can make me cringe!
I no longer am the first to offer a handshake when meeting someone as I have been hurt by the bone-crushing grip that some people like to give with their "firm" handshakes. It can make me cringe!
“IT'S ALL IN THE HANDS”
Photo by Debra Bunker
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