Heros/Villains

We don’t meet people by accident. They meant to come across our path for a reason, like everything in life that happen for a reason, they meant to be to teach us something or to leave an effect on us, it doesn't matter if its bad or good, but eventually it’s a lesson and it might help you with your next experiences and relationships that we will have, so we need to take that chance of learning lessons and make every single person we meet and every experience we go through during our relationships a chance of learning a new lesson, that can actually help us learning how to deal with a similar situations that might face us again, it makes the wisdom that gives you the ability to determine things going with your side or against it, and after every lessons you learn, you become ready to embark on another fantastic journey with a new person.

People are an essential part in our lives, the number of people that we can meet is unlimited, we can always meet new people, but we got to know what kind of people should we meet, because not all of them are going to affect on us positively, we don’t want to meet those pessimist people, people who make you feel that it’s the end of the world, who always know how to put obstacles in your way and make you believe that you can't escape it anymore , who try to hurt you and make feel disappointed , who make you feel your weak, truly toxic people will never be worth your time and energy, they create unnecessary complexity, strife and stress, they want you to believe how the world is miserable, but not how fantastic it is. It's important to learn how to deal with different kinds of people, try to find the ones who make you feel the moment, who make you feel how beautiful your journey with life is going to be, and how everyday is worth to live, and you always have the opportunity to fix your mistakes and and improve your self, who make learn how to take the advantage from everything and turn it to something can make you happy.

Sometimes we meet a person and we convince ourselves that this the one that we always wanted to meet, and we make our mind believes that they are perfect by just ignoring their imperfections and anything wrong they do, but eventuality when we wake up, we notice how wrong we were, and how fake they are. We can never understand other people , and we never know how their real person is, the one behind the mask, because people are complicated, in a very complicated way which is hard to be described, with a bunch of complex feelings and emotions, thoughts and reactions to situations, you can’t really get to the point where you can completely understand someone, because there’s always something hidden. However, when you are really close to someone, and you have strong feelings to, you think that you know them well and maybe more than they know themselves, the real one of them is laughing at you, saying to you: who do think you are? you don't know me, I gave you the permission to know only this part of me, and you just know the things that I want you to know, the real me is someone that you will never get the chance to know, the real me is more complicated and different than what you can see, even if you know my life story, even if you spent a long time with me that makes you feel you know me enough, you can never know who the real me is, it’s simply way complicated that how it looks.

Oudi was born in 1990. He was a spoiled child, like any child being the first kid in the family, they used to buy him everything, the best food, clothes and toys, his birthday was such a special occasion, they wanted him to be so happy that day, even if he still at the age of one year and he didn’t know what was going on, but they were so happy that god gave them his blessing, and they wanted him to feel how much they love and appreciate him when he sees the pictures later on. They sat up a huge party to celebrate this special day, they invited their friends and his friends, despite that he doesn't really have friends at that very young age, but those kids who are in his age or close to it , they bought a big cake with his name and picture and that number one candle on it, everybody start singing and clapping and looking at him, his mom said “he was so shy, his face blushed, and he turned it to the other side immediately ”. When they finished singing, told him to blow out the candle, he doesn't even know what blowing out means. Everybody got him a gift, he was so happy when he saw that much of toys, he felt he own everything in this world and nobody can touch it, he felt so happy that day, but he didn’t know that this happiness is not going to last forever. They did the same thing or even more on his second birthday, until they felt that he’s a lone, even though they were trying to make him happy as much as possible, but they realized that he needs siblings to enjoy and have fun with.

At the day before his third birthday, his mom gave birth, it was the best gift to give him, he got brother, he felt happy, but weird, he’s not used to see his parent spoiling someone else, but at that time he didn't know that this brother will change everything, he’ll make everything completely different, he never knew that he’ll be always there for him, he will be the person of the saddest moment before the happiest ones, he will be with him and on his side through the thick and thin in life.They grew up and shared everything together. They used to dress up the same, they talked like each other, they were always together, what made people always ask about the other one if they see one of them by himself, without even think about it.

He lived and grew up in the United States till the he turned seven, at that time his dad realized that him and his brother can only speak English, and when someone talk to them in Arabic they respond in English, even though it’s not their parent first language, but they got used to it, their parent did not like that, they wanted them to have both languages, they decided that they should go back to their parent's mother land for a bit, but at that time Oudi’s dad couldn't leave the state because he has his job there, and he can’t afford the enough money for them to live if he quit , so they Oudi went back with his mom and brother. They lived there and they got used to it after facing a lot of difficulties that everybody would face when moving to a new place and starting a new life that is completely different than the one they got used to. He went to school and he start learning Arabic, he was a smart kid, he used to get high grades in all of his classes, and all of his teachers loved him.

At the age of seventeen he decided that he wants to go back to the united states and live with his father, so he can work with him and also finish his high school there. By the first two weeks of his senior year, his life got completely changed, and everything became different than how it was, life is not great as how it used to be. His dad didn’t feel well, he went to the hospital, and after only two days he passed a way, it was such a shock. His whole life just changed in two days, he has never expected that , but that how life goes, you never know what is going to happen an hour from now. That day was the hardest day ever, he never felt that way of depression before, he felt tired, and exhausted, he hated life, he thought that it’s not worth to live anymore. Losing someone who is so close to to you makes you feel that everything fell apart in front of your eyes, and you can’t do anything about it. He loved his dad so much, he was depending on him in everything in life, he spent most of his time with him, he was a great person, he used to teach him about everything in life, he did a lot to him and to see him a successful man in the future, but unfortunately, he couldn’t reach that moment, he left too early and suddenly without any illnesses , without any sign that can tells Oudi that he’s about to leave very soon, he just left peacefully, without even saying goodbye.

At this time Oudi carried that huge responsibility of being the oldest man in the family, life put him in that situation of being responsible of taking care of his mom and his three siblings, he had a hard time doing it, he was always trying to help his family to forget what recently happened, he always wanted to see his mom smiling, he hated seeing her tears when she remembers his dad and the way he died far away from her. It was hard for him, he kept moving between the United States and Jordan, until the day that he convinced his mom and siblings to go back to Chicago and live their with him. They eventually moved, and life became better. Now he sees them easily, and at least he doesn't feel alone anymore, but who knows maybe he still feels lonely without his father with him after these years, maybe that seeing his family reminds him of everything happened, maybe he can’t describe the sadness that he feels or he doesn't want to show it to them, by wearing the mask of being the strong man who can handle everything, and maybe he really forgot, maybe he’s doing okay and he’s happy with his life. Who knows what’s going on. His young brother said “ He's such a wise man, he experienced a very hard times, he always makes my think deeply, spending time with him is like spending time with an old man with mind full of knowledge and wisdom,even though he's still young. He has a different way of thinking about things in life, and he always tries to teach me lessons that can help me”.

When we can’t understand ourselves sometimes, how do we want to understand other people?! It’s just impossible. We don't know how they feel and what they're going through. People are complicated, and sometimes you can’t even recognize them, you can’t just judge them from the way they act, or just the way they look, they are complicated, and their complexity makes who they are as individuals.