Debate: Which Is the Best Staircase and Bathroom?

Every day at Needham High, every staircase is used by at least one of the hundreds of students present during an in-person week. Climbing or descending a staircase is something that students do in passing (literally), and they often choose the nearest staircase to transport them to their next class. Do students even care about which staircase they use? You may think that a staircase is simply a staircase and should be chosen based on location and convenience. However, I am here to tell you that you are wrong. There is a top-tier staircase, and it is the staircase to the left of the auditorium, which leads to both the 900s and the music rooms. 

Needham High can get extremely crowded, and sometimes it feels like there are always so so many people around you all the time. Where does one go when they require a moment of peace, quiet, and privacy? Let's call it the Art Department staircase, that's where. No one ever uses this staircase, so it pains me to write about it, as I do not want this typically private staircase to get discovered. I am gatekeeping stairs, yes. However, I will share it with you all. 

This staircase is the perfect spot to wander to when you need an escape from the Needham High social scene. Or when you need an escape from your math class. Either or. Feeling sick or stressed? Take a nice long walk to the Art Department staircase, clear your head a little, maybe sit down (the floors there are clean, as no one but me walks there). Bored during a lecture? Wander over to the magic staircase, maybe skip a little, too. Stuck in a crowded hallway with loud students? Slip into the secret staircase, which, I might add, is a lovely and narrow staircase, fitting only one student at a time—no more bumping shoulders with people. The Art Department staircase is also soundproof; as soon as you step one foot into the stair’s little hallway, all sound immediately ceases to exist. How tranquil is that?!? You may think that Needham High closed last year because of COVID. Well, innocent readers, that is a lie. Needham High closed the previous year because the student body's introverts were overusing the Art Department staircase. My beloved staircase got too crowded. Luckily, every student who has ever seen said staircase got their memory wiped by way of hypnotization and Google Classroom notifications.

As my fellow stair-investigator Christine Mittaz has pointed out, Needham High can also get very dreary, as it is simply another high school. Although, I must say that the Art Department staircase has somewhat of a magical element. When I look down the stairs into the unknown, I cannot help but be reminded of some secret passageways of a certain school for witchcraft and wizardry. Needham High? More like Hogwarts, am I right?

Ok. If this has not been convincing enough so far, I must add that the Art Department staircase actually leads directly to Needham High's best bathroom, the 900s bathroom. It's small, cute, smells fantastic, and has a killer view; it's the perfect bathroom. No one wants a depressing, fluorescently-lit bathroom, *cough cough* the 400s bathroom. No one should have to step on a chip and wade through the unidentified liquid on the floor (100s bathroom). And no student should be forced to walk through the labyrinth that is the 700s bathroom. It's in the corner of the 700s, so it is at the end of both hallways, and the lighting is extremely dim. Every time I walk in there, I feel like the lights will flicker and a ghost will emerge from one of the toilets. Now, the 900s bathroom has big, wide windows, allowing for lovely natural lighting, perfect for those self-timer photos. There is a swinging door for an entrance; no need to worry about someone peering in. The view is too amazing for words. I'll try, though. It does not show the street, and one can see a row of lovely houses and beautiful treetops. This morning, it looked like a view from Edinburgh, not Massachusetts!

The Art department staircase is truly a hidden gem, and I only hope that each student gets to experience its serenity. As for the 900s bathroom, I urge students to have a little reflection time up there, bring a canvas, and paint the landscape seen from the window. Both locations bring a little more joy to my day, and I hope they bring a little joy to yours.