MarkD

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Groomsman: Mark DHow long have you known the groom? (Or what’s your relationship to the groom?)I've known Chris for as long as I care to remember. Our relationship is strictly professional.Using 1 word describe the groomSalty. What is the most annoying thing about the groom?His elitist, liberal, Ivy League education.

The best characteristic or trait about the groom?

His ignorance makes him bliss.

What is the first image that pops in your head when you hear "Chris Khalil?"

Disney's Goofy.

How many times have you seen the groom cry?

Three. One of those times was to the movie Airbud.

Which TV/movie/book character does the groom best represent in real life?

The old man from The Old Man and the Sea by Ernest Hemingway.

What was the best time you had with the groom?

The best time I had with the groom was when we shared a sofa bed in Ocean City, Maryland for 2 nights.

Where were you when you found out about the groom’s proposal?

Probably surfing the web and drinking orange juice.

What was your first thought when you found about the groom and bride’s relationship?

That is going to be the biggest wedding. Ever.

If the groom had to choose between watching a football game or talking with his bride, which do you think he'll choose? If you chose talking with bride, how many years/months/days before that'd change?

Watching football. Football is only once a week for a few months a year. Yostina is there every day. Forever.

Who wears the pants in the relationship?

They both wear pants because they are a healthy couple that do not discriminate based on gender. That also means that they'll both be wearing skirts.

Who would kill who first if the bride and groom were stranded on deserted island?

Yostina would kill Chris first because he doesn't know how to fight and he's so tall and conspicuous that he'd never be able to hide himself.

Which fictional father do you see the groom closely resembling as a future father?

Darth Vader.

How many kids do you think they will end up with?

Three.

Who is more likely to play the "bad cop" when disciplining the children: the bride or the groom?

Yostina will definitely be the bad cop. But more often than not, she and the kids will probably be disciplining Chris.

In a game of Connect Four who would win?

Every game of Connect 4 will always end in a tie. Same is true for Tic, Tac, Toe and Rock, Paper, Scissors.

Who should be more scared of their in-laws, the bride or groom?

Chris. The Mattas are nice but Uncle Misho's knowledge of audio equipment means that everything in Chris and Yostina's house will be bugged so that he can find out if Chris is saying anything critical of his daughter and, more importantly, the Republican Party.

Do you have a funny story about the groom that you'd like to share?

Chris is getting married in a few months.

Any last wishes or comments to the groom?

It's never too late to move to Indiana.

"There is no relationship between human beings so close as that of husband and wife, if they are united as they ought to be."

-- St. John Chrysostom, On Marriage and Family Life, Homily 20