Oldman,
When I was in high school, I became very active in a Baptist youth group. It was a huge church, much larger than the Lutheran Church I attended. The youth group was also huge. This was confounding to me. Once past confirmation, Lutheran youth generally disappear from church until some time after college when they sheepishly return with 2.3 infants requiring baptisms. But evidently, Baptist youth groups contain a higher proportion of really fine looking girls (that aren't already pregnant) than Lutheran youth groups do thus keeping attendance high. Also, a kind of siege mentality may contribute to an inflated sense of closeness amongst the participants. In any case, some of the more gung Ho missionary types were encouraged (by scores of youth pastors) to take the church's Adult Evangelism class (led by the minister of evangelism). I was not encouraged to take this class because I was not the world's most outgoing teenager. At least I think that's why - perhaps they were suspicious of my Lutheran pedigree. In any case, I signed up for the class (perhaps motivated out of spite), and somehow convinced the minister of evangelism that I was sincere.
There was quite a bit of Bible study designed to show how the Bible clearly tells us that evangelizing people with the '4 steps to Peace with God' pamphlet is exactly what Jesus wants. After much prayer, we were led to formulate our own individual personal testimonies. (And this is the big point I've been leading up to). The minister of evangelism said, "The powerful thing about personal testimonies is that nobody can argue with them." And, really, unless you're rude enough to tell somebody they're a liar, this pretty much turns out to be true. It is very hard, and not very profitable to argue with somebody's personal experience.
I read that chapter you recommended in Hebrews that had the list of people who are used as examples of faith. Some of them are pretty obscure, and it seems to me that there must have been other sources for some of this material besides the Old Testament. Of course I had to go back and read most of the whole book to start filling in context…and I have to say the attention paid to Melchizedek for his small cameo appearance in the Old Testament seems extreme. But seriously: The story of Abraham usually impresses me. I hope I am able to get up and move, to travel without a clear destination in view - if God should ask me. But that's the point. Abraham really did have a 'personal relationship' with God. If I am to believe my bible, they talked. God actually asked him to do things. They argued and negotiated for the fate of Sodom. They struck a deal/made a contract. They ate bread together.
Or did they?
Who were those three guys at the Oaks? Did the story get embellished as it was retold?
Iteration 1: Three guys visited the tent the other day.
Iteration 2: Three mysterious guys visited the tent and told me things they couldn't possibly have known.
Iteration 3: Three angels appeared at my tent and told me what my future was.
Iteration 4: Three visitors at Abraham's tent were an early archetype of God or the trinity.
It's an important question because:
Either - Abraham had faith based on a personal relationship (and you don't.)
Or - Abraham had faith based on a personal perspective (Just like yours.)
On one hand, some of the examples contradict the idea of faith without evidence. Moses saw God. Abraham became a father. Joseph saved his family.
Gosh, I remember I once did a sermon at chapel that contrasted the faith of the miracle ridden Old Testament patriarchs with the faith of Christians today infused with the Holy Spirit, pondering which might be the greater miracle or the greater faith.
Ultimately, I think stories of faith sound better and more appropriate if you write them closer to the end of your life, from a perspective where it is possible to draw some conclusions, if only because the possible plot twists are much reduced. But consequently, there is always the temptation to wax poetic - to put a little bit of gloss on it.
I just honestly don't see how anyone (besides joseph, mary, and several disciples) can claim to have a 'personal relationship' with Jesus. I think in your last email, you compare your personal relationship with Jesus to your personal relationship with your wife. It either makes me feel sorry for your wife, or makes me wonder if she is also invisible. Do you really have a wife? Or do you infer her presence from letters she wrote to someone else? See, you've put gloss on your story. Your personal experience allows you to suppose Jesus as an imaginary friend, as real (evidently) as your wife.
If I seem skeptical - well, it isn't that I don't believe you.
I don't have any evidence, I'm an ass, and yet I still cling to god - or try to - like I imagine Jacob did when he wrestled that night before going to meet Esau. Though the intended "hall of fame for heroes of Faith" section didn't speak to me, Chapter 4 did. "Today, when you hear his voice, do not harden your hearts." Or "For the word of god is living and active…."
Though I won't be trying to convince people to pursue personal relationships with Jesus, I will continue to seek God and to seek God's will and encourage (hopefully by my actions) others to seek something bigger than themselves. I'll try to continue to formulate and refine some of these crude thoughts I've thrown your way. I hope I haven't antagonized you. Thanks for the prayers.
scott