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Marriage Counselling Calgary

Marriage Counselling Calgary  is an effective ways to recapture connection in your relationship, finding again the friendship and intimacy you once shared.

Everybody knows that “relationships require a lot of hard work”. Let’s be honest: that’s one of the most overused sayings in regards to relationship advice.

But in spite of that fact, many couples refuse to actually put in that hard work. They invest in their homes, their cars, their vacations and their children, but fail to invest significant time and resources into strengthening their relationship.

That’s where marriage counselling calgary can help: at Living Well,we use one of the top three most recognized forms of couples therapies to facilitate healing, create understanding and recapture deep friendship and intimacy once shared. While it can’t promise results, our therapists are dedicated to helping you discover what is left in your relationship and how to salvage and rebuild that, if you both choose to.

Which methods do we use? Why are these methods so successful? Read below to find out how we help to strengthen their relationships:

Gottman Method


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John M. Gottman is a world-famous psychologist. He became well known by being able to predict with over 94% accuracy whether couples would divorce. He was also named one of the 10 most influential therapists of the past quarter century.

The Gottman Method of relationship starts by laying out a few fundamental goals, including:

-Increasing intimacy

-Disarming conflict through verbal communication

-Enhancing respect and affection

-Removing barriers which create a feeling of stagnancy in conflicting situations

-Creating a heightened sense of empathy and understanding on all sides of the relationship

In order to do that, Gottman outlines a number of practical procedures, including building “love maps” which express each partner’s worries, stresses, joys, and hopes. Other steps include building a positive perspective to problem solving and creating shared meanings and stories across the relationship.

Our professionally-trained counsellors walk couples through each step in order to meet all the goals outlined above. The end result is a happier, healthier, and more fruitful relationship which is equipped with the tools needed to manage conflicts and enhance trust.

Imago Couples Therapy


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Imago is another popular form of marriage therapy which involves delving deeper into the unconscious thoughts of each partner.

The marriage counselling calgary combines spiritual and behavioral techniques with western psychological methodologies. The ultimate goal is to arm couples with the tools they need to empathize with one another while also building common bonds between them.

One of the key concepts of Imago is developing the Road Map, also known as The Imago. This map is a blueprint of each partner’s journey through life. An important goal of Imago therapy is to make each partner understand – and facilitate – the other’s roadmap.

Emotion Focused Therapy


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Emotion Focused Therapy, or EFT, is a short-term method which typically involves between 8 and 20 sessions.

EFT is similar to cognitive behavioral therapy in that it treats emotions as the guide to our behavior. By learning how to manage these emotions, we can better control our behavior and lead healthier relationships.

A relationship may have started off on the right foot. But over time, even a healthy relationship can devolve into a clash of negative emotions. When partners constantly experience negative interactions with the other, it makes the healing process extremely difficult.

Thanks to emotionally-focused couples therapy (often shortened as EFT-C), many couples have been able to recapture the love and understanding in their relationships.

But the main benefit of EFT-C is that it’s the most empirically-validated form of couples therapy. Experts suggest that 70% to 75% of couples are able to move from the “distress” phase to the “recovery” phase during EFT, and that 90% of relationships show “significant improvements”. When compared to other couples therapy methods, EFT also tends to have the lowest chances of relapse.

Not sure if you want to start

An Assessment might be a great place to start. Ask to work with one of our Gottman-based couples therapists for a 3-Session Assessment. (Gottman Method only)

marriage counselling calgary may be the best way to save your relationship. However, taking the first step is rarely easy.

That’s why we encourage some couples who are unsure to start with a three session assessment. Over the course of three 90 minute sessions, our professionally-trained therapist will communicate with both partners to determine the best way to approach counselling. Typical assessment sessions include the following:

First session: 90 minute discussion together.

Second session: Two 45 minute discussions with each partner separately.

Third session: 90 minute discussion together where the therapist will talk about the strengths and weaknesses in the relationship. Then, the therapist will advise the couple on the research behind relationships and illustrate what makes relationships work. From this point the couple knows more about their relationship, and the therapist’s approach, and can decide if they want to do the work of counselling together.

Ultimately, this gives the couple a science-based, informed approach to counselling instead of simply an opinion.

Some couples continue with therapy following this assessment, while other couples may walk away with the valuable lessons they need to live a healthy relationship, or may choose to part ways should they decide that there is too much in their way to move forward together. In any event an assessment can lead to a greater informed choice about whether to proceed in investing in the relationship.

Is your partner hesitant to start the counselling process? During the assessment sessions, we can demonstrate the value that can come from couples counselling. If you are interested in a three-session assessment, please mention it on our appointment request form. Additionally all Living Well therapists do offer a free 20 minute consultation to start if you’d like to meet your therapist before getting started.

Sensitive to LGBTQ and Faith-Sensitive Requests

At Living Well, we can happily accommodate couples from all walks of life. Couples can request an LGBTQ-affirming therapist or a therapist sensitive to their faith perspective if needed.

 

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Why talking to a counselor could save your marriage

Why a Counselor

Getting closer to life can be tough when you are in conflict with your spouse. A conflict could arise due to the violation of personal, financial, sensual, psychological, or other aspects related to each other. Your thoughts are propelled by resentment for each other and your married life is on a rocky road. Your instincts may not allow you to listen to each other, leave alone the attempt to understand.

But somewhere within your (sub) consciousness, you are still in love. You (couple) may want to break up due to many reasons. They could be related to personal, family, kids, and many others. Then you’ll need a counselor who can reduce the bitter resentments between the two of you.

The probability of opening up your mind and heart with a stranger (counselor) is more since there is no clash of egos. So, the possibilities of getting a solution to save your marriage become more than your expectations.

Who is a Counselor?

A counselor is a person with vast experience in understanding human psychology, conflict management, clinical therapy, and family therapy. S/he may have a master’s degree and a license to work in that capacity.

Impartial Approach: A marriage counselor aims at restoring your marriage back to healthy condition. S/he is always impartial in approach. S/he listens to both of you in privacy and lists out the real problems. Sometimes s/he may seem to be harsh on you while advising. However, it’s an effort to make you realize your mistakes before pointing a finger at your spouse.

Ego Healer: A marriage healer is an expert ego healer. In the broader context, ego is the personal identity of an individual. It is a protection mechanism to safeguard you from physical and psychological invasion by others. When out of control, it can destroy relations (especially marriage) and destroy families.

A counselor can identify the sensitive points in your conflict where both of your egos have crossed the limits. S/he can suggest you how to “Let Go” and accept each other as you are. She will suggest changes in attitude, approach, and prejudiced opinions about each other.

Change Maker: A counselor can be a change maker since s/he will teach you how to think from your spouse's perspective. For these, both of you need an open mind and a willing heart to listen and put things into action. The changes can start with you (as an individual) and your spouse may see and experience them. S/he may also advise you to stay physically away from each other for a while (the kids can go to their granny and grandpa if you have any).

The counseling sessions may continue for weeks or months. The human psychology is such that when you don’t have the dearest one (though in conflict) with you, your heart stars missing that person. A counselor can use the age-old formula to bring peace and cooperation between the two of you and probably bind you with each other again.