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‘Know thyself!'
Temple of Apollo, Delphi
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AYESHA
Grappling with the recent loss of my mother, and seeking solace, I accepted a role in a play where my character also experiences parental loss, hoping to find catharsis in portraying such emotions.
Initially, immersing myself in the role seemed therapeutic. Yet, as rehearsals progressed, the lines between fiction and reality blurred. Scenes evoking grief reopened painful wounds I wasn't ready or able to confront. My emotional turmoil spilled over into rehearsals, disrupting the dynamic of the whole production.
My attempt to use the play as therapy backfired, causing complications for both myself and the production. Struggles with my grief hindered my performance and strained relationships within the company.
Recognising the need for support, the director and production team addressed my situation with empathy. Despite their efforts, I realised I needed more time to heal and stepped back from the production, causing a major headache for all involved. In retrospect I feel that there are questions I should have asked myself, and honestly answered, before accepting the role.
Ayesha
PRE-PRODUCTION
If you are working professionally, it may be beneficial to contemplate the following questions before committing to a role or production. If you are an actor in training, consider these questions, and perhaps collaborate with a tutor or director to receive guidance if you have concerns about taking on a character. Sometimes our desire to take on a role prevents us from being honest about whether we have the capacity to take on work or certain roles.
Questions to consider before accepting a role:
What motivates me to take on this role?
What do I aim to learn from portraying this character?
In what ways am I similar to this character, and how did these similarities develop?
How do I differ from this character, and what led me down a different path?
Do I have any mental health issues that might make me vulnerable? If so, what are they?
Are there any unresolved issues of mine that may be triggered by the character's journey?
Does the play contain themes that could be challenging for me at the moment?
What mental health professionals can I contact if needed for support during this role?
What social support will I have while portraying the role?
Do I feel confident and able to communicate with the director if challenges arise?
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