Social Emotional Learning

Week of June 15 - 19

Dear Benson Hill Families,

We made it to the end of an eventful school year! At the end of the year, I like to take time to have students reflect on their growth. For primary students, because their memories are not so great, this reflection often comes with tangible reminders, such as before (September) and after (June) writing samples and photos, as well as various charts and awards documenting their achievements. I also like to make sure that students take time to write meaningful thank you notes to the staff that have helped them grow academically, socially, and emotionally, throughout the school year.

Learning how to say thank you, verbally or in writing, is a valuable skill that lasts a lifetime. Several scientific studies have shown the physical and psychological benefits of practicing gratitude and it’s never too early (or too late) to start this practice. The SEL lesson for this week will focus on practicing how to say thank you and writing a thank you letter. If you have any questions about this SEL lesson, or any SEL lesson on this in-home learning page, please reach out to Ms. Lao, Benson Hill Elementary School Counselor: jillian.lao@rentonschools.us. I wish you all a safe and fun summer! Sincerely, Ms. Lao 😎

Activity

1. With your student, create a list of persons that have helped them learn and grow this school year. For some students, it might be easier if they start with a small list and if the time is narrowed to the past three months (COVID-19 school closure). Have your student explain the specific behaviors they appreciate in these persons. For example, your student may be thankful for their classroom teacher because she always took time to provide feedback on their work on Seesaw.

2. Have your student practice saying thank you by following this script.

“Thank you, (person’s name), for (person’s action). I felt (positive feeling) when you (person’s action).”

Example: “Thank you Ms. Lao for meeting with us every week for group. I felt special when you listened to me in group.”

*Make sure your student is looking up and using a sincere tone of voice.

*Plan for a time they can express gratitude to this person.

*Positively reinforce their effort.

3. Another way to practice gratitude is to write thank you notes. You can use the bolded script above or the templates below. For students who are not fond of writing, you can have them draw a picture related to what they are thankful for. For example, if they are thankful for their teacher’s weekly Zoom meetings, they can draw a picture of their teacher on the Zoom meeting or a picture of their teacher with flowers. Please feel free to practice using these templates and have your student come up with creative ways to deliver their thank you notes. Have fun!

4. For more ideas on how to help your student practice gratitude, such as gratitude journals or a daily gratitude practice during dinner time, watch this Teaching Gratitude video from the Greater Good Science Center.

Week of June 8 - 12

Dear Benson Hill Families,

Developing a growth mindset is critical for academic and social-emotional success. Students with a growth mindset believe that their skills can improve with practice. They don’t give-up easily and they learn from their mistakes. The opposite of a growth mindset is a fixed mindset or the belief that you cannot improve your skills with practice. Students with a fixed mindset give-up easily and don’t like receiving feedback. If you’ve noticed that your student has a fixed mindset in certain academic and/or social-emotional areas, now is a great time to start working on a growth mindset.

This week, we will focus on teaching students the difference between a growth mindset and a fixed mindset as well as a few strategies to help them integrate a growth mindset into their thinking and behaving. Modeling and coaching a growth mindset is also important work for the adults in your student’s immediate lives; to learn more, please read this Parent’s Guide to Encouraging a Growth Mindset and Coaching a Growth Mindset infographic.

Activity

1. With your student, watch this video and discuss the difference between a growth mindset and fixed mindset. Highlight the benefits of using a growth mindset. It might be helpful to pause the video after key ideas and discuss its relation to your student’s life. You can also use these handouts to help your student make the distinction.

2. One strategy to help develop a growth mindset is to turn negative statements around by adding the word “yet” at the end of each negative phrase. Review this poster with your student and add the word “yet” whenever you hear him/her message a fixed mindset.

3. Another related strategy is to practice using growth mindset self-talk when working on challenging academic and social-emotional tasks. Take a look at this list of growth mindset statements and write down a few on post-it-notes. Post the notes in your students work area or calm down area.

4. Asking the right questions when you need help can also assist in developing a growth mindset. Have your student practice asking these questions instead of just saying “I need help” when s/he is stuck:

· What is another strategy I can use?

· What is my next step?

· How can I get better?

5. Remind your student that no one is perfect and that everyone makes mistakes. It’s comforting for students to know that mistakes are a part of life and expected. For more ways to help your student develop a growth mindset, please read the following infographic: 25 Ways to Build a Growth Mindset.

If you would like additional information or if you have any questions about this or any SEL lesson posted on this website, please contact Ms. Lao, Benson Hill Elementary School Counselor: jillian.lao@rentonschools.us.

Week of June 1 - 5

Dear BHE Students and Families,

Last week, we learned that assertive communication is a skill taught to all Benson Hill students. This week, we’re going to focus on two skills that are also taught school-wide using our SEL program, Second Step – Empathy and Compassion. At BHE, empathy is feeling or understanding what someone else is feeling and compassion is empathy in action; the result of empathic feeling and understanding. Compassion is showing someone that you care.

Cultivating empathy and compassion in our students takes team work. Students need to recognize its value at home and at school. To nurture these skills at home, please read the tips in the yellow box below. If you would like additional information or if you have any questions about this or any SEL lesson posted on this website, please contact Ms. Lao, Benson Hill Elementary School Counselor: jillian.lao@rentonschools.us.

Activity

1. Review the Second Step empathy poster with your student. Highlight the definition of empathy and the questions in the thought bubbles – these questions are meant to facilitate empathic thinking. Provide your student with examples of times you have felt empathy and have shown compassion. Positively reinforce or recognize times your student demonstrates empathy and compassion.

2. Listen to the read aloud Stand in my Shoes: Kids Learning About Empathy by Bob Sornson. Have your student stop the video each time Emily demonstrates compassion and have s/he explain:

1. The compassionate words and actions

2. How others’ feel as a result of Emily’s compassion. In the end, explore how Emily feels at the end of the book?

3. Listen and dance to the Second Step music video Walk, Walk, Walk and answer the following questions with a partner:

· What feelings were mentioned in the music video?

· What do these lyrics in the music video mean to you: “Walk, walk, walk! Walk in their shoes. Try to see what they’re seeing?”

· Practicing empathy means walking in someone else’s shoes. What do you think it would feel like to walk in your teacher’s shoes? How do you think they might feel about teaching students during the school closure? How about the adults that live with you? Your siblings or cousins?

4. For additional activities please visit the following website: Pathway2Success and Making Caring Common Project.

Week of May 26 - 29

Dear BHE Students and Families,

Assertive communication is a skill taught to all Benson Hill students. From Kindergarten to 5^th Grade, students are taught that assertive communication is a skill for learning and a way to respond to hurtful and unsafe behaviors. Our school-wide SEL program, Second Step, defines assertive behavior as asking for what you want and need using a calm, firm, and respectful voice. Assertive communication also includes body language. For primary-age students, assertive body language includes 1.) facing the person and 2.) standing with your head up and shoulders back. Being assertive does not come naturally to many students; it’s a valuable skill that needs to be practiced.

If you have any questions about this or any SEL lesson, please contact Ms. Lao, Benson Hill Elementary School Counselor: jillian.lao@rentonschools.us.

Activity

1. Review the differences between passive, aggressive, and assertive with your student. Use this PowerPoint to help your student distinguish between all three types of behaviors.

2. Have your student practice recognizing passive, aggressive, and assertive behaviors in books and movies. Below are some read alouds to get started:

· The Recess Queen by Alexis O’Neill

· Me First by Helen Lester and Lynn Munsinger

· The Little Red Hen by Paul Galdone

· The Three Billy Goats Fluff by Rachael Mortimer and Liz Pichon

3. Practice using assertive behaviors using the scenarios below. If your student is struggling to find assertive words, have them use a Bug and Wish with this format.

· Asking your teacher for help with work.

· Asking your friend to stop teasing you.

· Asking your sibling if they can share or take turns with the ipad.

4. Positively reinforce times you see your student using assertive behaviors.

5. Additional reading for adults: Assertiveness and Stress Management and Learn Assertive Communication in 5 Simple Steps.

Week of May 18 - 22

Dear BHE Students and Families,

During the past three weeks, we reviewed the Second Step calming down strategies (positive self-talk, counting, and belly breathing) in addition to related strategies such as grounding and square breathing. This week, we will review Kelso’s Choices, our school-wide conflict management curriculum taught in Kindergarten – 2^nd grades and reinforced in our intermediate grades. Kelso’s Choices are nine strategies students can use to solve small problems. Small problems are problems that students are strong enough and smart enough to solve on their own. Big problems are scary and dangerous and students must report it to an adult they trust.

If you have any questions about Kelso’s Choices, please reach out to Ms. Lao, Benson Hill Elementary School Counselor: jillian.lao@rentonschools.us.

Activity

Review the Kelso’s Choices poster with your student. Discuss the difference between a small problem and a big problem based on the description above. Help your student identify adults they can go to for help – at home and at school.

Emphasize that when a student encounters a problem, and when they don’t know if it’s big or small, that it’s o.k. to let an adult know. It’s ultimately the responsibility of adults at school to make sure students are safe regardless of the problem type.

Discuss and practice using all 9 Kelso’s Choices with your student. If needed, please use these guidelines.
Have your student practice using Kelso’s Choices and reporting big problems to an adult by using the role-plays below. After reading each scenario, have your student look at the Kelso’s Choices poster and pick a choice to act out.

Note 1: Students are taught that tattling is when you want to get someone into trouble and reporting is when you want to keep someone safe. Taking a big problem to an adult is reporting.

Note 2: Students only role-play the pro-social behaviors. Adults can role-play negative behaviors.

*A student is throwing rocks at recess.

Big Problem = Report to an adult.

*A student steals form the teacher’s desk.

Big Problem = Report to an adult.

*You walk into the restroom at school and see a student playing with matches.

Big Problem = Report to an adult.

*A student keeps bothering you and you’ve tried to make it stop many times.

Big Problem = Report to an adult.

*You and a friend get to the drinking fountain at the same time.

Small Problem = Kelso’s Choice.

*You and a friend can’t agree if the 4-square ball was in or out.

Small Problem = Kelso’s Choice.

*A friend keeps taking and using your markers without permission.

Small Problem = Kelso’s Choice.

Have your student teach Kelso’s Choices to a family member or friend. They can use these handouts to create lesson materials.
Have fun!

Week of May 11 - 15

Dear BHE Families,

We’ve been learning about the Second Step, calming down strategies during the past two weeks and this week we are going to learn about the 3^rd Second Step calming strategy: counting. Slowly counting to a certain number helps students calm down by removing them from the problem and having them engage in a different activity (counting) before returning to the problem. Ideally, by the time the student returns to the problem, they are calm and ready to problem solve. From my experience, it helps students to use counting in addition to another calming strategy, such as a belly breathing, self-talk, or grounding, and examples of each will be included in this lesson.

If you have any questions about our school-wide SEL program, Second Step, or emotion management strategies, please reach out to Ms. Lao, Benson Hill Elementary School Counselor: jillian.lao@rentonschools.us.

Activity

1. Review the Second Step How to Calm Down Poster with your student and highlight that counting is the calming strategy of focus this week. Emphasize that it’s o.k. to have strong feelings, but it’s not o.k. to be mean.

2. Model counting by slowly counting to 10 and slow counting backwards from 10. Discuss with your student if s/he thinks this is a strategy they can use to calm themselves. Ask them which number they would like to reach and if they would like to count forward or backward. Maybe having this Hundreds Chart ready to use will help.

3. Practice counting with self-talk and belly breathing by following along this video: Counting Breaths. Variations include 5 Finger Breathing and Square Breathing. Practice one or all of these strategies when your student is calm and be ready to guide them in using these strategies when they are upset.

4. If you want to try another calming strategy that includes counting try The 5 Senses Grounding Technique.

5. Remember: Learning how to calm down takes practice and trying to figure out which strategies work best for you takes time. I’m really curious as to which calming down strategies work best for you. If you want, please e-mail me (Ms. Lao) and let me know what you think: jillian.lao@rentonschools.us

Week of May 4 - 8

Dear BHE Families,

Last week, we learned about belly breathing to help ourselves calm down. This week we are going to focus on using positive self-talk as a calming down strategy. Our school-wide SEL program, Second Step, defines self-talk as talking to yourself quietly or in your head. Negative self-talk is unhealthy and unhelpful (examples: I can’t do this! and This is too hard!). Positive self-talk is healthy and helpful (example: I can do this! and Mistakes help me learn!); it can be used to help you stay focused and to calm you down.

Activity

1. Review the Second Step How to Calm Down Poster with your student and highlight positive self-talk. *Emphasize that it’s o.k. to have strong feelings, such as anger, but it’s not o.k. to mean.

2. Define self-talk and provide examples of positive/healthy self-talk negative self-talk/unhealthy.

3. Discuss the consequences of negative self-talk (giving-up; feeling sad or scared) and the consequences of positive self-talk (trying your best; feeling happy and calm). *Emphasize that when you are feeling strong feelings (such as anger, fear, or jealousy) thinking in a positive way can help you calm down. Use this anchor chart and this popular image to help make the point.

4. Decide on an activity or situation that typically elicits your student’s strong feelings. Decide on 1-2 positive self-talk statements your student can use before your student engages in this activity and when strong feelings emerge. Write it down and remind your student use this self-talk often. You can also use these cards to help you figure out positive self-talk statements.

5. Remember: This is going to take practice

Questions? Comments? Suggestions? Please reach out to Ms. Lao, Benson Hill Elementary School Counselor: jillian.lao@rentonschools.us

Week of April 27 - May 1

Dear Families,

During this unpredictable and stressful time, I’m sure you’ve been reminded about the importance of managing emotions, a skill that takes practice for both adults and children. At Benson Hill Elementary, we teach Kindergarten - 2^nd grade students how to manage strong feelings using our school-wide SEL program, Second Step. Belly breathing, counting, and positive self-talk are three calming down techniques highlighted in the program and each strategy will be an area of focus in the coming weeks.

This week, we will focus on learning how to Belly Breathe (also known as Diaphragmatic Breathing). When we’re stressed, we tend to breath in a shallow manner. Reminding ourselves and our students to take slower and deeper breaths, begins to calm our bodies – heart rates begin to slow down and muscles become less tense.

Activity

1. Review the Second Step How to Calm Down Poster with your student. *Emphasize that it’s o.k. to have strong feelings, such as anger, but it’s not o.k. to mean.

2. Watch the following video with your student and follow along with the Belly Breathing instructions.

3. Check each other’s Belly Breaths – remember that the belly comes up with inhales and flattens with exhales.

4. Decide on times during the day to practice belly breathing.

5. Decide if you want to help remind each other to use Belly Breaths when strong feelings arise.

6. Support each other with kind words when you practice calming down strategies.

Extension Activity

1. Watch a baby sibling/cousin sleep. See if you can notice their belly rise with each inhale and out with each exhale.

2. Review Belly Breathing regularly with your student. This music video might help keep the message alive.

3. Visit Seattle Children’s Hospital Website to learn more about the Deep Breathing and Abdominal Breathing.

If you have any questions about this lesson, please don’t hesitate to reach out.

Sincerely,

Ms. Lao

School Counselor

Benson Hill Elementary

Week of April 20 - 24

Dear Benson Hill Families,

There’s a good chance you’ve heard the term “SEL” multiple times this year and you’re probably wondering: What do the letters stand for? What does it mean? SEL stands for Social Emotional Learning and (as the name suggests) is the process in which students learn and apply social and emotional skills. More specifically, SEL includes building skills in self-awareness, self-management, and self-efficacy in addition to skills in social awareness, social management, and social engagement.

At Benson Hill Elementary, we recognize the value of SEL and believe it’s just as critical as Reading, Writing, and Math (to learn more about its benefits watch this video). As a result, I’ll be posting new SEL lessons at this site each week. The lessons are meant to be completed with a family member, so that students have support in real-life skill application. If you have any questions, would like more information, or would like feedback on your students SEL work, please don’t hesitate to reach out.

Sincerely,

Ms. Lao

School Counselor

Benson Hill Elementary

jillian.lao@rentonschools.us

The Never-Never Rules

All 1^st and 3^rd grade students in the Renton School District are taught the Second Step: Child Protection Unit. This unit includes a lesson on The Never Never Rules, a compilation of rules to help keep themselves and our community safe. The lesson below is designed for Kindergarteners, 1^st graders, and 2^nd graders. It reinforces self-management skills and reinforces responsible decision making.

Activity:

1. Review the Never Never Rules with your student

2. Listen to the Never-Never Song as a family

3. Pretend your student is in a situation when a Never Never Rule is broken. Have them practice how to refuse and say “no” to an unsafe situation.

4. Talk with your student about the importance of reporting unsafe situations to you and other trusted adults.

Discussion Questions:

1. Which Never Never Rules have you used this week?

2. What would happen if everyone decided not to follow the Never Never Rules?

3. Who can you teach the Never Never Rules to at home?

If you have any questions about The Second Step: Child Protection Unit, please reach out to Ms. Lao, Benson Hill School Counselor: jillian.lao@rentonschools.us

Week of April 13 - 17

Hello Bobcats! We hope you had a fun, relaxing, and safe spring break! How are you feeling today? What is one reason you feel that way?

We have planned some activities to help you stay busy, and we hope you enjoy them!

We miss you all very much!

Love, Ms. Lao, Ms. Bland, Ms. Olivia, and Ms. Rambo

Social Emotional Learning Activity

The Yucky Bug by Julia Cook is a new way to teach kids about what they can do to keep themselves and others healthy. Click the link below to access the video and feel free to use the discussion questions and follow through activities to keep this powerful message alive.

The Yucky Bug by Julia Cook

Discussion Questions:

1. What are the Magic 5? Pick one and Re-teach it to a Family Member.

2. What are different ways you and your family are staying safe?

3. When you're feeling scared like Junior, what can you do to feel better?

4. What do you like about staying home and healthy? What do you not like?

5. What are some fun activities you have been able to enjoy while avoiding the Yucky Bug?

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