It's important to recognize and treat mental illnesses in children early on. Once mental illness develops, it becomes a regular part of your child's behavior. This makes it more difficult to treat.

But it's not always easy to know when your child has a serious problem. Everyday stresses can cause changes in your child's behavior. For example, getting a new brother or sister or going to a new school may cause a child to temporarily act out. Warning signs that it might be a more serious problem include

• Problems in more than one setting (at school, at home, with peers)

• Changes in appetite or sleep

• Social withdrawal or fear of things he or she did not used to be not afraid of

• Returning to behaviors more common in younger children, such as bedwetting

• Signs of being upset, such as sadness or tearfulness

• Signs of self-destructive behavior, such as head-banging or suddenly getting hurt often

• Repeated thoughts of death

To diagnose mental health problems, the doctor or mental health specialist looks at your child's signs and symptoms, medical history, and family history. Treatments include medicines and talk therapy.

NIH: National Institute of Mental Health

https://www.nimh.nih.gov/health/publications/children-and-mental-health/20-mh-8085-childrenmenthealth_157169.pdf

Remember: 

• You don’t have to be an expert

• Some topics can be a bit difficult or awkward to discuss with your children. Perhaps you’re not sure quite what to say, or how your child will respond. For many people, mental health can be one of those topics. You might imagine this kind of response.

1. Seize the moment 

It might be over a meal, during a car journey, or during the commercial break while you’re watching the TV together. These informal spaces can be great opportunities to talk about serious topics in a more relaxed atmosphere.

2. Explain that we all have mental health

Mental health is about our range of emotions and how we cope with our lives. Our mental health can fluctuate, just like our physical health - over the course of our lives, or even from day to day. 

3. Start small 

You don’t need to set aside hours to chat. Just opening up the conversation makes a big difference.

4. Mental health is positive too 

Mental health isn’t just about mental illness, it is also about wellbeing. You could chat about things that aid wellbeing, like talking, exercise, chill out /'me' time, time away from social media and homework pressures. Mental wellbeing doesn’t mean feeling happy all the time. It’s about feeling able to cope with life’s ups and downs.

5. Talk their language 

None of us are always familiar with the terminology around mental health or mental illness. But young people will most likely be familiar with the idea of feeling stressed, depressed, low or anxious. They might also have encountered eating disorders or self harm among their peers or in the media. Explain that this is part of what we mean when we talk about mental health.

6. Depersonalize 

Research suggests that young people often find it easier to think and talk openly about a hypothetical situation rather than their own feelings and experiences. So, instead of asking them direct questions about themselves, you could ask ‘how someone might feel who is stressed about XYZ?’ You could talk about soap opera, tv or book characters. 

7. Link to other types of stigma and discrimination 

Explain that just as other types of prejudice or discrimination (such as discrimination on the grounds of race, age, gender, sexual orientation or disability) are unacceptable, so is mental health stigma and discrimination. We can make a real difference by being open-minded and non-judgemental.

8. Show you’re happy to talk and listen 

Above all, let your child know that if they are worried about their own mental health – or the mental health of someone they know – they can come and talk to you about it and you will be there to support them.

9. Learn together 

It’s OK not to know or understand things. You could always suggest that it’s something you can learn about together. 

10. Check out the resources 

There are lots of resources on the internet, and you might find it useful to hear from people who have had these types of conversations with their children before.