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Video games are a great place to meet up with old friends or make new ones, and play is scientifically proven to build bonds of trust, but how do you start a spiritual conversation with someone who is just there to play games?
What NOT to do: Unless they have initiated a spiritual topic, showing a clear hunger for the subject in this moment, it isn't a good idea to hijack the conversation for an extended period of time (just like you wouldn't want someone to go on and on about an obscure movie that you don't care about). Even if they do bring up spirituality in some form, it is wise to try to prayerfully keep an eye on their endurance for heavy things and not outstay your welcome.
Instead: Think of conversation like a cork floating in water. Our natural state is to stay comfortably on the surface, but real connection and meaning is built when we get below the surface. It's good to ask questions that invite your friend to pull the cork into deeper waters, as long as we aren't forcing them.
3 Major Tips
3 Major Tips
With the Holy Spirit's leadership, you can sense where to take each conversation, but here are some powerful options...
1. Wondering Questions:
Get curious about their life.
You can start with your current activity. Ex. "What got you into this game?" or "Who first introduced you to video games?"
Show genuine curiosity for their life beyond the game as well. Without sounding like you're probing for ID theft info, ask them how they're doing and what life has been like lately. Listen carefully, and affirm their feelings and experiences. Look for points of overlap with your own life, and ask them to elaborate if they seem comfortable.
Looking for more ideas?
Doug Pollock writes a great book about creating a "God Space" atmosphere where people feel encouraged to open up about their lives and spiritual interest. In it, he lays out 99 Wondering Questions that you can adapt for your conversations.
2. Prayer Request:
People are rarely offended by the offer of prayer. It is opt-in (so they have permission to say "no") and communicates genuine care. Here's a sample script I have used in video games and even with servers at a restaurant:
"I'm someone who likes to pray. Is there anything I can be praying for you about?"
Depending on their reaction, you can quietly write down their prayer request or even offer to pray for them right there. Either way, you the Holy Spirit can give you discernment about how quickly you get back to the game at hand.
3. Sometime Question:
The word "sometime" is such a powerful way of broaching a spiritual conversation without pressure, and reserving a time in the future where they have fully opted in to talk about God. There are plenty of ways to put this, but here is one example:
"We've been friends for a while, but I've never heard about the spiritual side of your life (which is a pretty big deal to me). Sometime, I'd love to hear your story and tell you mine. Would that be okay?"
If they say they're not interested (hasn't happened to me), you haven't hurt them by asking. If they say sure, though, you can move back to surfacy fun for now and then follow up a couple days later with an offer for a specific time to grab coffee or hang out in the lobby/Discord to "have that spiritual conversation I mentioned."
When you do get to sit down with them, I recommend asking them these questions:
What religion did you grow up with?
Has anything changed in your faith?
What have you learned about faith and spirituality?
How interested are you in a relationship with God?
Could I share with you about my experiences?
If they opt in to learning about your perspective, share your own journey (testimony) and include the points of the gospel from the GodTools App.
Alternatives to the questions above could be Soularium Cards or Perspective Cards. I've had a non-Christian gaming friend pray that very night the seeker's prayer "God if you're out there, please reveal yourself to me." He then thanked me so much and asked to borrow the Perspective Cards to "use with all my friends, cause this was awesome!"
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