Rutland Teacher of the Year 2010-2011

I was so honored to be voted on by my peers as Rutland's 2010-2011 Teacher of the Year. As Teacher of the Year I was asked to write a paper and in writing the paper I feel like I grew as a person and an educator. I would love to share with you some of my paper. Anyone who knows me...really knows me...knows that if I am anything...I am honest. I hope you enjoy my thoughts as much as I enjoyed writing them.

Tell us your "Philosophy of Teaching"

I believe that getting an education is the most important thing that anyone could do to better themselves. I graduated from high school in 1989 with a GPA of 1.77. I did not learn to read until I was in fifth grade, so I never excelled in school. Because of low grades and lower self esteem, I never pursued furthering my education. In the years to come, I became a mother, and through the eyes of my children, I was taught the most important of life’s lessons: have enough patience and you can learn anything. In understanding what the problem is, you can solve it. By staying consistent, you will always know what to expect and even though it is nice to have someone there to help you through the rough spots, only you, believing in yourself, can make a difference. That became my life’s motto and my philosophy of teaching.

When I decided to go after my dream of becoming an educator, it was those life lessons that kept me moving toward my dream. Being a student, mother, and wife during college took a lot of patience. I remember nights when I would have to wait to do my college work until the kids were in bed. I used to keep a notepad handy and jot down things while cooking dinner and folding laundry.After patiently waiting for bedtime, I would finally get to sit down and bring life to my papers.

It took some time to figure out how to do it all. I’m a perfectionist and I always put 110% into anything that I do. I was now wearing three hats of responsibility and it was becoming impossible to give enough attention to each of my life roles. I had high expectations for myself, so giving less to any of them was not an option. I finally understood what the problem was and how to solve it. I was trying to do everything at the same time, so I needed to add a set of routines to my life. Juggling all three hats was not easy. I made a schedule and I stuck to it. I counted on that consistency to keep order in all three areas of my life. I have to be honest when I say that there were many nights when I wanted to give up. Those were the nights when I thought about that fifth grade girl who had the courage to learn how to read when all her classmates were reading to learn. If I could do that surrounded by peer pressure, I could certainly lose some sleep to create more hours in the day to make this work. I believed in myself enough to make my dreams come true. I received my Bachelor’s degree in December of 2005 where I graduated with honors at a 3.6 GPA. I went even further to receive my Master’s degree in May of 2007 where I graduated with a perfect 4.0 GPA.

My philosophy of education comes from those life lessons; patience, understanding, consistency and self-worth. To become an effective teacher, I believe that every one of these points have to be met.

Patience comes with teaching kindergartners to stay in line. It is teaching first graders to read. It is helping third graders to learn how to multiply. It is dealing with the hormones of junior high and trying to teach algebra. It is understanding that parents need our support, not judgment. It is helping students learn from their mistakes while knowing we still care. It is handling the diversity of students and helping each of their individual needs.

Educators who understand the developmental stages of children hold the key to dealing with student behaviors. Problem solving comes with the understanding of what the actual problem is. A child who cannot read as well as the other children needs an understanding nod that it is okay. A child who is overly active needs the teacher who understands that they need to move around. A child who didn’t have breakfast needs a teacher who understands that basic needs have to be met before academic learning can take place. A child who is angry and throws a pencil needs a teacher who knows that he just lost his mom to cancer and that he is just crying out for help. The biggest understanding of an effective teacher is in knowing when to teach reading, writing and math and knowing when to just teach children. Teachable moments occur every day and that teaching does not come from a textbook.

Educators must be consistent, or students will never know what to expect. If students know the outcome of behavior and they know you will enforce it every time, they will learn very quickly that there is a consequence or reward for their actions. If you tell your students that this is going to happen today, then it is your job to make it happen. Consistency in the classroom is important for students. You cannot expect children to reach your expectations if you keep moving the target each day. Consistency builds independence. Most importantly, if students learn that you say what you mean then they will come to count on it.

Teaching children to believe in themselves comes through praises, pats on the back and encouragement. Students have to learn that the worker is the learner. If someone else does all the work, you are not learning. It’s not the final grade that makes you smart. It’s what you learned along the way that stays with you forever. My favorite quote is, “My teacher thought I was smarter than I was…therefore I was.” With enough encouragement, children will develop self-worth and that will help them to succeed in anything they set out to do.

Every morning when I step into my classroom, I remind myself to always have patience, understanding, consistency and self-worth in the day-to-day teachings of my students.

Discuss what you consider to be your greatest contribution and accomplishment in education.

My greatest contribution and accomplishment to education is having the courage to share my story with others and to admit that I do not have all the answers. My hope is that I will impact as many people as possible through hearing about my journey and what it took for me to become an educated person. When I tell people that I did not learn to read until I was in fifth grade their reaction is that of blame.

“You must have had bad teachers.”

“Didn’t your parents know or care?”

“Didn’t you try in school?”

"It must be because you were on the free lunch program"

Blame is not the message I want to dwell upon. The message I want to share is, “How did I get all the way to fifth grade without anyone’s awareness?”

As a kindergarten student, I remember when I felt “different” from the other kids. At first we all struggled to learn the letters and sounds of the alphabet, but then when everyone’s “ah ha” moment happened I was still saying “huh?” I wanted so badly to understand. The teacher obviously did not like it when I would get things wrong, so I would listen and listen, until finally I figured out something that helped me. Oh, it didn't help me learn to read, it helped me keep my secret. If I watched and listened carefully, I could memorize what the others said and it would appear that I knew the sounds. I would even memorize stuff like the letter ‘a’ is written on a card that is torn at the bottom or written in green ink. My teacher would test during nap time. She had a set of flash cards with letters and we had to tell her the letter and the sound it made. She would whisper our name to come back to the back table with her one by one. I would pretend to be asleep so I could lie there and listen to the others first. When I thought I knew the answers, I would wiggle around and then she would call my name. I would recite those letters and sounds to get a smiley face on my paper and a big smile from the teacher, which was much better than that exasperated breath she would blow when I got things wrong. Well, there were a few times when she must have shuffled the cards and I was lost, but I just pretended that I needed to go to the restroom and I would stay gone until I was sure rest time was over. That’s how I survived initially without anyone knowing my little secret.

As I moved up in grades, it became easier and easier to hide my secret. We took turns reading so I would count ahead to where it would be my turn to read and try and connect the words to what others were reading and pray that I could come up with something when it came my turn to read. If I couldn't, then I would have a coughing fit so I would be sent out for water and then I would stay gone for a while. Tests were a piece of cake! I had trained myself to cheat with my eyes and no one ever knew I was looking at someone else’s paper. I did get a reputation as a goof off, since I always did something stupid when all else failed. I would hear teachers talking about me sometimes saying that I just didn't try and they couldn't get my parents to take off work long enough to come in and talk about things. Their attitude about me only helped me in hiding my secret. My ending grades proved I was worthy to pass, but I never learned a thing except how to cheat and keep my secret.

When I started fifth grade my teacher did something that was devastating to me. She actually wanted to get to know me. She actually got to know my family! She found that we had a family of seven kids and both my parents had to work in order to make ends meet. She even stayed after hours to meet with them so they did not have to miss work. Mrs. Tribble taught everything in small groups, and made games for us to play. She tricked me into giving up my secret! We were playing bingo and everyone had different words so I couldn't memorize or cheat. I didn't want to leave because it was a game. I still remember her slowly seeing my frustration and sliding her finger to the matching words on my sheet. At the end of that day she called me back for a talk, just one on one. She looked at me and said, “You can’t read”. Those three words changed my life forever! Mrs. Tribble set in motion many things to help me that year. I was retained in 5th grade, and she spent endless hours helping me catch up. I remember sitting at my special table, where I had headphones so I could listen to phonic sounds and read phonetic books while the others in class did different class work. Each afternoon she would walk me through step by step what the others had learned that day and she wrote out those same directions so that my mom could help me at home. She cared about me and what I learned, so I wanted to care and learn for myself. During my two years in her care she had awakened in me a passion to read, so when I wasn't in school I was reading anything I could get my hands on.

Now, the next seven years of my schooling were not very easy. I had a lot of trouble keeping up. After I left Mrs. Tribble I was sort of lost in the system. Everyone just expected me to be like everyone else so I struggled in silence. I found out years later that Mrs. Tribble had passed away. I never again found that comfort zone with another teacher until my daughter started kindergarten and my faith in the school system was renewed. Mrs. Marlette Carey welcomed me into her classroom as a parent, and I fell in love. I saw firsthand how one teacher can make all the difference in a child. She encouraged me to get my teaching degree and helped me make the connections to get the ball rolling. One teacher again had changed my life forever!

In college I was again faced with a renewed faith in education. That is where I learned that offering students’ encouragement, expecting them to succeed, and always being there to listen and guide them is just as important as teaching the curriculum.

I remember walking into Cumberland for the first time. I was greeted with the question, “Are you a graduate student?” I was 32 years old, so she assumed I already had my undergraduate degree. Well, I was not knowledgeable at the time so I said, “Yes, I graduated”. She explained the difference, but I was mortified! I remember excusing myself to run to the bathroom so that I could get out of this college where I apparently had no business applying. That is where I met Dr. Whitefield. She was talking a mile a minute and I was so captivated by her! Before I knew it, she had me in the admissions office, met with financial aid and signed up to get my Bachelor’s degree in education. She introduced me to Dr. Ruckman and I still remember what she said, “I want to introduce you to a wonderful young lady who is going to make the education department proud.” He smiled at me and welcomed me with open arms. I was in awe at his excitement for teaching.

In the years to come, I met many professors just like them and was held to those high expectations, so I strived to make them proud. I was given advice and encouraged every day without fail. I went from a 1.77 GPA from high school to a perfect 4.0, due to the fact that I wanted to be this person that they saw in me. I wasn't the smartest person, but I learned how to work hard for what I wanted, which made all the difference in the world. My professors thought I was smarter than I was…therefore I was! I have been out of college for five years now and I still stay in touch with my professors. If I have questions I always get a response that is loaded with advice, encouragement, and surrounded by a dose of love. A few weeks ago I asked for recommendation letters from some of them and it is amazing that after five years they could not only remember me, but remembered specifics…they took the time to know me and that has left an impact on me forever.

I tell the story of my education to bring awareness to the table. Blame is not the issue. Awareness is the issue. I do not believe that I had bad teachers. I feel that I had teachers who were unaware of the best strategies to reach me. I made a promise to myself that when I became an educator, I would bring awareness to all educators, parents, and administrators who were willing to listen. Awareness comes in a huge packet in education. It is not only having the educational background to teach curriculum, but also having the heart to understand that all students are different and offering more than is expected.

I do not have all the answers, but I am willing to go that extra mile to learn all that I can to enable me to be aware of all things that might help me to be the best teacher I can be. Then I will try to share that knowledge with everyone with whom I come into contact.

What makes you the person you are today?

Living and surviving through things that you didn't think you could, makes you the person you are. Overcoming struggles in life makes you appreciate life and keeps you in positive spirits about what you have and it makes you stronger for having the strength to survive.

My dad was an alcoholic, and it was tough to live in an environment where my mood was based on that of another, who had an addiction. My dad always worked hard and instilled that work ethic in me, even through his addiction to alcohol. He has been sober for 12 years now, and each day I think how hard that must have been for him. It taught me that courage comes, through admitting your faults and working toward correcting them.

The year I graduated high school, my mom had a car wreck that left her with many problems including short and long-term memory loss. She had to learn how to walk and talk all over again. She will never be the person she once was, but her strength has taught me that life may not turn out like you expect, but you have to make the best of what you have.

In June of 2009, my husband passed away in his sleep from congestive heart failure. I learned many things from this experience. First and foremost, I learned that you never know how strong you can be, until being strong is the only choice you have.

Overnight, I became a single mom of two, and everything I had known for the past 18 years had disappeared. My friends and family were amazing to me, and they taught me the biggest lesson in life through their generosity and selfless acts of kindness.

My husband and I had struggled financially because of his health issues, for years prior to his death. Our house was literally falling down around us, because little things had to be overlooked, due to medical expenses and those little things became bigger problems. I felt as if I was living two lives.

When I came to school no one ever knew what I struggled with at home. I was taught growing up that material things are not important so I never complained and accepted the cards life had dealt. I was embarrassed to share, because I felt like we should be doing better since I had finished my degree and tried to better our lives.

After my husband’s funeral, I was approached by Chuck York, Gene Jones, and the principal at my school, Yvonne Kittrell, who offered to help me rebuild my house. I was so embarrassed, and I felt sick that this part of my life had to be noticed in such a capacity. I had always been the giver and not the taker, and it was difficult for me to change roles. Mr. York is the assistant principal’s husband at my school and I also went to high school with him. Mr. Jones is a former parent, and his wife and I graduated high school together. I taught both of their boys during their first grade year. All three of these families put in motion a task that I am still in awe of to this day. The community donated and helped to rebuild my home for me and my children, as well as helped financially to pay for my husband’s burial expenses. Countless hours of work and time went into the biggest home makeover I have ever seen.

My sister and her husband offered us a place to call home during the reconstruction, and their love and support helped us through the toughest grieving we had ever experienced. My colleagues at school gave me grace and support to grieve, while I still kept the consistency of the only place in my life that was not in upheaval…my classroom! This experience left me with the most powerful of lessons:

    • true friends accept you without judgment

    • there is no shame in asking for help

    • strength comes from many different places

    • family is there for you without fail

    • God gives you nothing you cannot handle, but carefully places people in your life that will help you up when you feel like you’re falling

The Jones’ boys were here during the rebuilding of my home. They wrote their names on one of the boards that made the door to my bedroom. They told me that it was so I would never forget them, because I was a good teacher to them. Each night, when I lay my head down in that bedroom, I think about that statement and I pray and cry at the same time. I cry happy tears for the blessings I have been given, and I pray to never go a day without paying forward to others the same kindness I have been given.

All of these hardships have made me the person I am today, and I am proud to say that I still keep a positive attitude about life, and I never forget where I came from and how far I have come, or the people who have stood by my side to help me make it through.