In a society not rendered humorless by ideology, everyone privileged to be ruled by so masterful a comedian as Donald would be sporting Trump attire and accessories.

In a society that has been rendered humorless by ideology, it is arguably one’s cultural duty to foster liberation from ideological humorlessness by flaunting Trump attire and accessories.

Princetonians for Trump are here to help. In this section, we facilitate your purchase of the tools of liberation.

For those who prefer to shop in person rather than online, and to do so as near as possible to the font of inspiration, three venues seem noteworthy:

First, the gift shop of Trump Tower, at 721 Fifth Avenue in Manhattan, a physical retail venue of The Trump Store, a largely online vendor:

Second, the Trump Boutique at the Trump National Golf Course in Mar-a-Lago, Palm Beach:

Third, White House Gifts, at 701 15th St, NW, in Washington, only one block from Donald’s humble pad on the Potomac. Discreet cannabis consumption is now legal is the District of Columbia, so at White House Gifts, one can lawfully relish the delights of Trump attire and accessories properly prepared.

Need we add that we earn no commissions from this? Appreciating Donald is its own reward.

However, for those not fortunate enough to attend Princeton, and thus not already awash in all the money one could ever want, Donald has created boundless opportunities. Why does one find no orange and black Trumpwear at the Princeton University Store, no pink and green Trumpwear at Lilly Pullitzer?