One of the most important things you’ll ever learn about sex, relationships, and even everyday life is this: your body belongs to you. No one has the right to touch you, pressure you, or make choices for your body without your clear permission. This is called bodily autonomy, and it means you are the one in control of what happens to your body.
It doesn’t matter if someone is older, more popular, someone you’re dating, or even someone you care about a lot—your body is still yours. You get to decide who touches you, how, and when. And you have the right to say no at any time, even if you’ve said yes before.
Consent means giving permission for something to happen. In relationships and in sexual situations, consent means that both people clearly agree to what’s happening—and that they’re doing so freely, without pressure or fear.
Here’s what healthy consent looks like:
It’s clear: A simple “yes” or “I want to” that isn’t confusing.
It’s enthusiastic: The person actually wants to do it, not just going along with it.
It’s specific: Agreeing to one thing doesn’t mean agreeing to everything.
It’s reversible: You can change your mind at any time, and that’s okay.
Saying nothing, freezing up, or not resisting isn’t the same as consent. Consent should be active and honest.
Consent isn’t just about sex. You practice it in small ways all the time:
Asking before hugging someone.
Waiting for a friend to say it’s okay before borrowing something.
Checking in before posting someone’s photo online.
These everyday examples help build respect and communication skills that matter in more personal situations later.
Giving consent can be simple:
“Yes, I want to.”
“I’m comfortable with that.”
“Let’s try that.”
But it’s also okay to set boundaries:
“I’m not ready for that.”
“Can we slow down?”
“No, I don’t want to.”
If something doesn’t feel right, you don’t need to explain or apologize. A “no” should always be respected.
It’s just as important to ask for consent as it is to give it. A good partner checks in with questions like:
“Is this okay?”
“Do you want to keep going?”
“Are you comfortable?”
Asking shows care, respect, and maturity. It might feel awkward at first, but it gets easier with practice—and it builds trust.
When both people feel safe, respected, and in control, experiences—whether emotional, romantic, or physical—are healthier and more meaningful. Consent helps protect people from being hurt or taken advantage of. It also builds stronger, more respectful relationships.
Even if you’re not thinking about sex yet, understanding consent now will help you in friendships, dating, and all kinds of relationships.
In short:
Your body is yours.
No one can touch or pressure you without your permission.
Consent is clear, ongoing, and can always be changed.
Respect goes both ways.
Coming up next, we’ll talk about understanding your own body—and how getting to know yourself can help you make informed, confident choices. But first, take a moment and show yourself what you have learned.
Thinking Questions.
1. Why is it important for a person to be allowed to say “no” without needing to explain?
2. How can a person tell when someone’s consent is not truly free?
3. Describe a situation (real or imagined) where someone changed their mind about consent. What should happen next?
4. In what ways can learning about bodily autonomy affect how someone treats others?
5. How can a person respond if someone doesn’t understand their boundary?