Compared Child

Microsoft OneNote has been my best friend for this project.

Using the kanji lyrics I obtained from Google, I singled out unfamiliar vocabulary and grammar. With reference to romaji lyrics I found on Genius.com, I searched for the meaning of the words using Jisho.org. Along the way, I will add the unfamiliar vocabulary into my glossary. As for grammar, I made simple notes alongside the lyrics in OneNote. I made use of Japanese blogs like Tofugu, and language learning forums like HiNative and Italki to understand Japanese Grammar.

This was challenging to do as I found every other word as unfamiliar, and I had to search it up on Jishou.org for its meaning one at a time which was very tedious. I had to put my patience and discipline to the test as I am usually quite a hasty person who prefers to rush through things.

[Chorus 1]

Ahh, compared child, compared child,

I already knew it long ago

That I am more inferior than her

Don’t say it, I already know

So don’t compare, no, don’t compare,

Just leave me alone!

My left side is hurting me

I am so distressed ~

[Verse 1]

Somehow, I feel a gap between us

I am living but I keep pushing beyond

A B C D E F G

No matter which choice I choose

There’s more ways for failure

I got injured again

[Pre-Chorus 1]

Pain, pain, go away

Thoughts are meaningless things crosses my mind

Without thinking, I let go and weep

I hope whichever put an end to this and give me relief

I want to throw this all away

[Chorus 2]

Compared child, child

I already know

It is my fate that anyone will call me an idiot and stop me for cherishing anything I like

And that’s why I want to give it all up

Just leave me alone

But my dreams are coming out

Isn’t it so funny?

[Verse 2]

Only for a brief moment, just for a little while

I am facing the true me

V W and X Y Z

No matter which side I stand on

My failures merely stands out

Ah, its getting worse

[Pre-Chorus 2]

It’s dark, it’s dark, I am so afraid

I can’t even feel my body move

Mist covers the things that I love the most

The girl beside me raises her flag

It’s too dazzling

[Chorus 3]

Compared child, compared child

I am nevertheless living

I cannot produce any great results yet I am pushing forward and living

And so I breathed and close my mouth

Just leave me alone

My eyes close

It’s the end

[Bridge]

Parallel lines intersect

Hey, just leave everything outside behind

It’s impossible!

[Chorus 4]

Ahh, compared child, compared child

I already know

I understand that at the end of the day I won’t go unrewarded

So don’t care about me don’t talk to me

Just leave me alone

If only I know from the beginning

That I would hate you

Compared child, compared child

This is what I say

A conclusion I conveniently make when I can’t see anything around me

That’s why please remember, don’t forget

I really love you

You stopped breathing and hugged me

Our hands linked together

TUYU had published their own translated English lyrics accompanying the Youtube video. However, I saw that there are artists covering "Compared Child" in English using their own translation, and I was inspired to do the same.

I made use of TUYU's official English translation, as well as JubyPhonic and Rachie's lyrics to interpret the song. I also chose to take a more literal approach instead of taking liberty to make the song flow better.

In the last chorus, Bera-chanw as communicating to Kura-chan. From 周りが何にも見えなくなって勝手に決めつけてるよ, Kura-chan realised that her being inferior is the not the truth, rather something she assumed when she feels anxious or overwhelmed. Bera-chan also tells Kura-chan how much she love her and it was a moment of acceptance. As Bera-chan appears to be a different colour of Kura-chan, perhaps it was more of a moment of self-acceptance.

The chosen colour for the music video is a cool pastel blue, usually associated with sadness and hence conveyed the depressing theme behind the song lyrics pretty well. The chosen background are commonly associated with academics, such as grided paper and circles typically used in mathematics. Kura-chan also wears a sailor uniform, commonly associated with Japanese school girls. 

A black cat appeared several times throughout the music video. Although black cats are usually considered unlucky, in Japan, it is the opposite. In Japan, black cats are considered good luck and is a talisman against bad luck. We'll explore this more in the Culture section below.

A golden-colored version of Kura-chan appeared later in the music video. Just like how in English we call a promising and talented young child the “golden child”, it could be that Bera-chan symbolises the 金の卵of Kura-chan. Kura-chan may felt compared to the best potential of herself and felt that she could not achieve her best self she had in mind. In the music video, we can also see the two blocking each other’s mouth, as if trying to symbolise that they are each hindering each other. 

Towards the end, Bera-chan told Kura-chan she loves her very much and accepts her for who she is. Bera-chan’s warmer color consisting of brown, gold and red convey the warmth in these words, whilst Kura-chan’s cooler colors consisting of blue, white and navy blue conveys the despair she felt. In the color wheel, blue is the opposite of orange/yellow (which is also known as complimenting color). This perhaps signifies how Kura-chan and Bera-chan are the opposite of each other, and yet they compliment each other well.

 I remembered the first TUYU song I resonated was this song. A song about the constant feeling of inferiority. No matter what Kura-chan do, she feels that she will always fail.

 I used to be a straight A student, but now sometimes I am struggling to pass a subject. I always feel that I am never enough as compared to my past self. The emotional “無理だよ” conveyed how impossible it is to accept myself as enough.

Kura-chan was not comparing herself to her peers. Instead, she was comparing herself to the best version of herself. She had high expectations, and when she doesn’t reach them, she felt hurt. In the end, she understood that her efforts will not go unrewarded. Even when she didn't achieve her goal, she had gathered rewards along the way like new experiences and lessons learnt. 

When one is overwhelmed, it is easy to get carried away and think that we're a failure. Hence, it is always important to remind ourselves that these thoughts are not true, and we should always learn to accept and love ourselves.