Giving back involves a certain amount of giving up. -Colin Powell

This week was a climax. I figured out that I’ve been stuck on my research project for no good reason. I mean, this whole time I’ve been hung up on the fact that I am without a mentor. Since I haven’t done any completely independent research before, this was partly justified. But I still had yet to learn how to get mentorship and help on my own.

I was frustrated last week because I’d tried to conduct a six hour long experiment and it ended after only two hours because my results were turning out to be pretty poor. I blamed myself for this; I thought I’d done something wrong and was prepared to try again tomorrow. But then, someone told me that the plate reader, which measures my results, might be broken. Then I was really upset with myself because I ended the experiment simply because I thought I screwed up. I didn’t even consider that it could have been something else.

One of the PhD students in the office asked me “mako ve?” (How’s it going), and I told her what happened. She said that it’s important that I learn what I can from this experience, and that just because I couldn’t get help from my assigned mentor, doesn’t mean I couldn’t get help from someone else in the lab. She and other lab members have been saying repeatedly that laissez faire is how Prof. Schroeder runs his lab. The lab members collaborate with each other to interpret results and solve problems, and only meet with Prof. Schroeder as a guide. I felt better after this; I asked the PhD student to review my results with me later. She pointed out things I didn’t even think of, which was great because now I could move forward. But it was also a bit frustrating; regardless of how I shift my perspective on this issue, I do feel I should have received better guidance in this project.

I went with my roommate to meet my friend from NJ at free salsa lessons downtown. The program, called Media Noche, operates completely through volunteers and trains people from the basics and upwards every Wednesday at 8:30. Everyone was really engaged and it was super fun; sadly I only have a few weeks left here. Maybe I’ll try more salsa when I get back to the US.

Afterwards, we went to this place called Taco Slash, and passed this beautiful display of colorful strings (cover picture); I think someone told me they were put up to celebrate gay pride. It was so unique; in Japan, often there were night festivals with lamps hanging from strings as you walked through the streets, but this was different. I didn't realize that Haifa has a 'nightlife' as well.

We went to Ethiopian food too! It’s so nice to find guys who enjoy good food because I feel like being a “foodie” is often seen as a girl thing. But that’s a lie, guys love food. Anyway it was so good, I loved injera (the bread) and the potatoes. We had this interesting conversation with one of the cooks there, who is actually Colombian. She moved to Israel, and told us how she learned Hebrew mainly by listening to Hebrew songs. She listened so much she got sick of all the music, but it really helped her get a feel for the language. Now, she is trying to do the same with Ethiopian. It struck me how motivated she was to learning a new language; it sounded like really hard work. I remember how one of my labmates, an Arabic woman, had said that I probably don't feel as motivated to learn new languages as non-English speakers since English is spoken everywhere. I guess she was right.

I went to HaMis'ada Shel Ima with the UConn guy from my lab and a postdoc who I know through Prof. Cohen-Karni. I was interested to hear why people choose postdocs and how they choose their topic of research. I’m not sure I want to do a postdoc. I still want a PhD, but recently I’ve been feeling that professorship is not for me. Prof. Schroeder has five startups, 30 lab members, and a family to take care of. Meanwhile I can barely handle a few classes; I try really hard to do everything but I always stretch myself too thin and get upset. I want time to live. I know why he does it though, Prof. Schroeder. It’s because he loves the work and he doesn’t want to let anyone down-he knows we all need him. The last time I felt that way was when I captained my high school Science Olympiad team. The problem was, SciOly ended up consuming my entire life and it wasn’t good for me in the long run. But I really want to find work I love. And I don’t think I’m there yet. Maybe some of the new classes I’m taking next semester will help me make that decision.

There was a heavy metal party for the end of the semester in the Student Union. I went and danced a lot, and said goodbye to some friends. In the end we all gathered around the piano at the student union and sang happy birthday in our native tongues. It was so cool, there was German and Taiwanese, Swiss, Hebrew, Hindi, Czech, and English. I will miss all the people that I met here :(

I finally made it to Talpiyot! SJ had told me about this market near Hadar that has insanely cheap veggies and meat. I also wanted to go to see where the locals buy their food, so Friday morning I went right before Shabbat with the UConn guy from my lab. He took me to this sandwich place called Bracha's first. Bracha's is a small shop near the Ethiopian restaurant with a red awning, run entirely by an elderly woman named Bracha. You tell Bracha you want a sandwich and she'll make you one, never mind what's in it. It was very tasty though. This dad came in with his son, and was saying that he'd come here his entire life and now it was time for him to pass on the tradition. He took a picture of his son with Bracha, and then they had their sandwiches and left. I think his son was very confused about it, but I thought it was really sweet and highly amusing.