Issue #16

In a shocking and unprecedented act of violence, Zelda, the iconic video game character, robbed a bank and nuked Ohio with semi trucks driving off skyscrapers.

The incident occurred on Wednesday, May 18, 2023, at the First National Bank of Hyrule. Zelda, dressed in her iconic green tunic and wielding her Master Sword, entered the bank and demanded all of the money in the vault. The bank employees complied, and Zelda fled the scene with a bag full of cash.

Zelda then drove a semi truck to the top of a skyscraper in downtown Hyrule. She loaded the truck with nuclear weapons and drove it off the building. The truck crashed into the ground below, detonating the nuclear weapons and leveling the entire city block.

The blast wave from the explosion traveled for miles, leveling buildings and killing thousands of people. The city of Hyrule was completely destroyed, and the surrounding area was left in ruins.

The United States government has condemned Zelda's actions, and a manhunt is underway for her capture. Zelda is considered to be armed and dangerous, and the public is advised to contact the authorities if they see her.

The incident has left the world in shock and disbelief. Zelda is a beloved video game character, and her actions have caused widespread fear and uncertainty. It is unclear what her motives were, but it is clear that she is a dangerous and unpredictable individual.

The world is a different place now that Zelda has nuked Ohio. The future is uncertain, and it is unclear how the world will recover from this tragedy.