Summary: Summer is here at the Smash Castle, and Greninja left his room for once to bask in all the female life.
Original publish date: June 7, 2025
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It was a warm afternoon at the Smash Castle. The younger ladettes had gathered, some splashing in the water, others lounging by the poolside... well, the pool was just a huge hole in the dirt filled with water, but close enough.
Min-Min sat cross-legged on a pool chair (actually a log), in a towel and not quite ready to dive in. "Soon," she kept saying to herself.
Across the "pool", Pyra and Mythra stood on the shallow end steps, half in the water, both wearing bikinis that didn't leave much to the imagination.
"This is so stupid," Mythra grumbled, toeing at the water with mild disgust. "There's literal sewage in this water. Yuck."
"Relax, Mythra," Pyra said, her voice soft as usual. "It's good to take a break once in a while. Besides, look around. It's a..."
Pyra looked around. The sky seemed nice, but all the ruins in the distance were not beautiful looking.
"...not a bad day," Pyra mumbled a lot quieter. "It could be worse."
Not far from them, Lucina sat on the dirt's edge, dipping her legs in, in a much more modest one-piece.
"Are you gonna get in?" asked Zelda, lying on her back in the water in a bikini, eyes closed.
"I'm just here to survey the area."
Zelda raised her eye. "Survey? From what?"
Lucina shrugged. "You can never be too vigilant."
Zelda chuckled. "Sure."
And then there was Jigglypuff, at the water's edge, one hand on her hip, looking completely out of place in a cute little floatie she'd insisted on wearing around her middle. She eyed the group with her usual sharpness.
"You know," Jigglypuff said, "this whole 'let's relax by the pool' thing would be way funnier if one of you, like, accidentally drowned."
Mythra smirked. "Indeed."
Jigglypuff raised an eyebrow, a smirk playing on her lips. "I was thinkin' of you, Brit." She swam to the pool edge and picked her phone up from the dirt. She scrolled to a saved picture on her Twitter, of french fries covered in cheese. Not even melted, just cheese. "What the hell is this?
Mythra snorted. "Don't you Americans eat pancake burgers? I saw that once, at McDonalds."
Jigglypuff shook her head. "You guys eat baked beans on toast. And not as like, some dumb novelty. Literally you eat that shit for breakfast."
Mythra was silent
Lucina sighed, splashing her feet lightly. "I sense conflict. Cease and desist."
Mythra stuck her tongue out. "Boo," she said, as Jigglypuff splashed some water on Lucina.
From her floating spot, Zelda lazily streched her arms. "There's peace in enjoying a moment of stillness, Jigglypuff. Lucina's right about that."
--
Now let's go away from the pool, to the surrounding bushes. There we meet a ninja froggy, Greninja. He was crouched, completely still, watching and adjusting the focus on his phone. He was taking pictures, carefully snapping shots of Zelda adjusting her bikini top, Lucina stretching, Min Min dippin' her feet in the water, still not entering
"Zamn… look at those feet," Greninja whispered, tapping the screen to snap a picture. "Gonna save this one for later... hell yeah..."
He frowned. These girls were hot, but he was still looking for one...
"Sheik didn't come out?" sighed Greninja. "Aw..."
He turned around, and started to slither away. But his foot brushed against a twig, and snapped. He bit his lip, and his eyes went bug. He froze in place, no more movement.
Lucina's head snapped towards the sound. "What the hell?" she asked, sitting up. "Anyone else hear that?"
Zelda glanced in the direction of the bushes. "You're right… I thought I heard something too."
"And you girls said what I was doing wasn't necessary," said Lucina. "Safety is always important."
She stood still, waiting for other people to concede. No one did.
"...Okay, Min-Min? Come with me."
Min-Min stood up. She stretched her oversized ARM out, it snaked thru the air and in the bushes.
In the bushes, the hand grabbed Greninja's abdomen. "GRENI-?!" he screeched. Not loud enough for most outside the bush to hear, but-
"Ooh, I caught one," said Min-Min. She treated the arm like a grapple, and zoomed in. Lucina followed her.
The two girls made it in the bushes, and saw Greninja, stumbin' to his feet, shaking off a few leaves. He was still clutching his phone. Lucina and Min-Min just stared at him, eyes narrowed and frowning.
"What were you doing in there?" said Lucina. "Pretend I don't already know."
Greninja shrugged. "Oh, just takin' pics of you girls. You know, for… later," he said in his signature hoarse wheezing.
Min Min's eyes narrowed. "What the hell do you mean 'for later'?"
Lucina crossed her arms, glaring.
Greninja blinked, completely unfazed. "Yeah," he wheezed, "I'm gonna jerk off to 'em later. You girls are hot."
Lucina's mouth hung open; against her best wish, she chuckled. Just a teeny bit. She regained composure fast tho. "W-What... what the-"
Min-Min moved her arm back. "You're not going to lie?"
"Why would I? I-I never li-liiie," wheezed Greninja. He took a second to cough.
Min-Min threw a fist into Greninja's chest, grabbed him, and threw him back, sending him flying into the pool.
Greninja flailed in the water for a second before surfacing, grinning like a idiot. "Worth it," he wheezed, clutching his phone above the water to keep it dry.
Lucina, arms still crossed, shook her head in disgust. "We should definitely report him to someone."
Min-Min shuddered. "Yeah. Samus?"
"Yes, that would work. She's always been good with this type of stuff."
She and Min-Min walked into the Smash Castle. Meanwhile, at the dirt pool, Jigglypuff, Pyra and Mythra noticed Greninja.
"Hey there, uh, what's yer face?" said Jigglypuff. "I haven't seen you in ages."
"Finally left your cave?" added Mythra. She poked his stomach. "You hungry or somethin', twig?"
Greninja chuckled. "A little, but who has time for that?" Wheeze. "I'm always watchin' bitches, ya-ya dig?"
"On your phone?"
"...Yeah," said Greninja. "And my computer, but y'know, it-" he coughed. "It counts."
"I'm leaving," said Mythra. "Summer's ruined for me." She got out the pool.
"Ditto," said Jigglypuff, puffing up and flying away.
Now it was just Pyra and Greninja. Greninja turned to Pyra.
"You like frogs?"
"Yeah."
"Wanna keep me as a pet?"
"..."