CURTAIN opens. A sign posted announces the “Kyrgwhatistan state fair, now in it’s 500th year. Featuring the Lost German Children’s Choir”.
Children: (sing)
Liederhosen, liederhosen ya ya mein her
Kaput kaput en eisendrathen mayor nein der...
(They stop, one of the children tells a bad knock knock joke, then they continue.)
The Boss
Okay. Okay. Enough for today. You’re scaring the customers. And me.
A Worker
Boss, there’s a man here to see you about the choir.
The Boss
Oh, really? Mmmmmm. (aside) Probably wants his ticket refunded. Tell him I’m not here.
(The Piper approaches him from behind, The Boss turns and shrieks mildly.)
I just got back! Wait a minute. You’re the wandering musician who left these warblers here 490 years ago. Long time no see.
The Piper
Yes, I’ve returned for the children. Not to mention my career in show business. These children and I have a
date with destiny. Hollywood’s looking for a group of singing joke tellers for George Lucas’ next movie.
We’re a shoo-in.
The Boss
How delightful. But there is the matter of their contract, eh?
The Piper
Simple. I buy back the contract and cut you in for a percentage.
The Boss
Done. Give it to me in gold Florins please.
The Piper
Now, let’s not be hasty. I’ll wire you the funds as soon as we receive an advance from Mr. Lucas.
The Boss
How can I trust you? You told my ancestors you’d return in a week,or so. That’s a mighty long or so.
The Piper
You’ve heard the expression “Pay the Piper” haven’t you? Well there you go. You know I’m good. Anyhow, it doesn’t look like you’re doing so good with them here.
The Boss
These “Knock Knock” don’t translate into Kyrwhatastan very well. Okay. They’re yours.
Choir Person 1
Are we getting out of here?
Choir Person 2
Are you taking us to Hollywood?
The Piper
Not exactly. We may have to warm up in a few places first:
Choir(sings)
